I met a new guy and I want to make him my boyfriend. But he's popular and I've heard he's had lots of fwbs and hookups. He's fucked his female friends too. What can I do to make him commit to me fast instead of dating and hanging out like how I usually do? I don't want to compete for him.
I see two options. A. become one of his "pod" and be treated like the rest. I don't think that is going to work... why would he just pick you when he has a herd of females and more coming? B) Be different. Be enticing, intreaguing, peak his intelligence and desires, and then hold your boundaries. Respect yourself before him and let him know you are a quality person, not to be used and abused. He will either respect that or move on.
I think option B could work if you can paint the right picture for him. But be forewarned, its going to be work holding him. Its possible, but expect a lot of work on his part and yours. pain and suffering is good, but know it is coming... if you want book references and youtube links where I got this view, lmk.
You can't MAKE him do that. He can choose it, if he feels it's in his best interest.
My advice is this:
You KNOW you're attracted to him. Forget that for a second. What about him? How mad is he about you? Because if he's not very attracted to you already, I doubt you can change that. It just doesn't work quite the same for guys in my opinion.
But if he's attracted to you a lot, don't have sex right away. Take your time. Don't make him suffer, just take your time.
For him to want to stay with you, you have to offer value. Something that makes him really happy, that he can't get anywhere else. You need to be very much yourself, in other words. Unique.
I was once with someone who was an amazing listener. That is one example of a skill I doubt I'll ever find anyone who can compete with. That is the stuff love is made of.
Are you better than all his hoes and side-chicks? Smarter, more successful, better looking than all these girls? If so, he'll be easy to snare... If not, sorry... Try something a little closer to your league...
I don't think you want this kind of a guy. If you do end up with him, by the sounds of it, it'll end in heartbreak when he cheats on you. He is clearly accustomed to getting whatever girl he wants and it's only a matter of time before you've become just another item.