So my boyfriend (who I've been dating for 3 months now) is being really jealous and possessive lately. I mentioned in passing that I'm texting my ex boyfriend because I wanted to be upfront and honest, and he blew it completely out of proportion. He was really angry with me and even threatened to throw my cell phone out the window. I honestly thought he was joking at first but he was dead serious. I was only texting my ex because we're still good friends and he needed me to pick him up at the airport because none of his friends were in town. He told me that I couldn't go to the airport to pick him up and wouldn't give me my phone to tell my ex that I wouldn't be able to make it. I couldn't even apologize or anything and I felt so bad and embarrassed that I started crying. My boyfriend just cursed at me and said I was being way too sensitive and then starting laughing at me before giving me his phone to make the call. He was blatantly making fun of me and then after he cooled down a little he bought my roses and apologized but I can't help but feel that he belittles me and sees my emotions as a sign of weakness. I feel sick just thinking about the whole incident. I don't know what I was expecting, but I guess I assumed he'd be more comforting when he saw me getting so upset. He bought me a new cell phone as an apology but I honestly think it's because he wants to keep tabs on who I'm calling and texting. I've never done anything to make him question my loyalty but he always says he doesn't trust me? Now he wants to read all my messages and hear my phone conversations with my ex. Am I blowing this out of proportion or is he really mocking how I feel? Please help me because I can't even think straight right now :(
Most Helpful Guy
Saying "I'm texting my x" is a threat! You don't go pickup your x boyfriend at the airport, he gets a cab for himself! The only way you do this is if you have your new boyfriend with you and he is involved in the decision to do so. Even then it causes issues. Are you ok with him fixing his x girlfriends car? Texting her about details of your relationship? I don't think you'd like it.
I tried this with my girlfriend as a prior girlfriend is my best friend. It causes problems, especially for people who are less secure. It is a threat and it will cause him to act out (he's showing immaturity, but you are young so no wonder).
you both need relational counseling together. It should be standard practice these days...1
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Most Helpful Girl
Unhealthy relationship. I would encourage you to leave. I think it's good that you were trying to be honest and upfront about what you're doing, and he definitely blew it out of proportion. He could have just told you he wasn't comfortable with it, or even offered to go with you to pick your ex up if he was that against it.
Also, cursing at me is a HUGE dealbreaker. I've told anyone I've ever dated that if they cursed at me I would probably leave. No one should talk to you that way, especially because you didn't do anything wrong. And making fun of you is a no no as well.
I dont think this incident is a huge deal, so I can't imagine how he would react if you actually did do something wrong. I think you should leave. He can't keep you around just by buying you things, and no one who loves you will make you feel the way he did over this.0