Possibly getting back together with my ex?

I need some advice. Me and my boyfriend had been together almost 3 years when he decided to call things off with me to figure shit out in his life. This was almost 3 months ago. We only stopped talking for about a week or two while we tried to sort stuff out but we really missed each other. Since then we have talked about wanting to get back together but it has been really complicated. Lately things have been going pretty good, and we pretty much act like how we were when we were dating except we aren't official. I feel like even though we aren't together, if you want to be with someone you should be willing to prove that you are committed to them and only them wether you are together or not. He feels that until its official we are still technically single and free to flirt with whoever. I know he has a POF account and he knows I have a meetme account. I only use it to chat with people because I don't have a ton of friends and its nice talking to random people, which I've explained to him. I've even let him go through the messages and he can see I don't flirt with anyone and when someone flirts with me I stop talking to them. I decided to go through his POF account, with him watching, and the first message I click on he wrote some girl and mentioned how gorgeous her eyes were and they kept talking from there casually. I got kinda upset because I feel like if you are trying to get back with me why are you hitting on this girl? He got defensive and stated that I'm a girl so I don't have to try to talk to guys whereas its harder for guys and the only way to talk to a girl is to compliment her which I felt like is BS. I told him I hate his double standards and we ended up dropping the conversation. He also is adamant that he is going to go to strip clubs even though he knows they really bother me and his solution is just not telling me when he goes. I really want to make things work between us but I just don't know about these things. Any thoughts?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you like him and if he has changed from bad to good.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • He was obviously bullshitting you and he said that as an excuse. Men usually make such accounts because they hope they get laid.
    Anyway, I don't think you can make things work between you. He already lies to you and he wants to hit the strip clubs. What does that tell you about his character?

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What Guys Said 2

  • It doesn't sound like he really wants a relationship, it sounds more like he wants a friends with benefits sort of arrangement, where he can get all the perks of a relationship but still be allowed to go out and get with other people. I don't think it could really work, unless he changes dramatically, and even then, would he change for good or would he just continue to lie to you. If I were you, I would move on from him, he seems like a bit of a jackass.

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  • Bad move.. don't do it.

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What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

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