Is he just not that into me?

I have been hanging out with this guy for about a month and a half. He is much younger than me so I have blamed a lot of this on his age but maybe that is not it. We see each other 2-3 times a week, he works down the street from me at a restaurant and we usually stop by each others places then go out after. However, he has not asked me out on an official date or even asks what my schedule is like. Also, we have texted each other a couple of times but we do not do that regularly, so a few days will go by where I don't see him or hear from him. I am also not texting him though. I actually don't feel like I have much to text him about, but general consensus is that he would be texting if he is thinking about me and I think at this point it would be nice to add that element, but I would want him to instigate that. I don't want to in case it bothers him, maybe he thinks the same about me? Or is that an excuse, because he would if he wanted. One night he texted and wanted to hang out when he thought I was off of work but he was drunk. Lol. We became intimate starting a couple weeks ago, and he is very respectful about that, he never seems to even want to leave the next day unless he is working and we always hang out beforehand. When any couple begins intimacy, I feel it is normal to have a lot of sex at first and pretty much every time you see each other... but I also do not want it to only become about that, and now, all affection leads to that. So I am confused, it is really new so am I just trying to rush things and he is still feeling it out? Or he already knows he is not that interested?


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What Guys Said 1

  • He is just respecting you on a mutual level. If you wanted more attention you could just ask for it and he would try to fit it in. He's honestly just in his position not wanting to seem maybe "needy" and seem like he's the one taking advantage of you.

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What Girls Said 1

  • You have been"hanging out" or are you guys officially a couple? If not then It could be he only wants sex. If you say you blame his age, it's possible he has a fetish or something because you're more mature than he is. But you should talk to him about it. You're too old not to grasp the things you want in life, even if you have to be selfish sometimes. Ask if he still is interested and tell him how you feel.

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    • I did know at first that because of the age difference this would just be fun, but of course it wouldn't have gotten this far if I did not like him on some level. We hung out for awhile before having sex and I kind of initiated it (it had been a long time!). But like I said, he definitely does not treat me like a booty call, he is very respectful in this regard. He is a guy and of course wants sex and in any dating situation, when you start doing that, it is all you want to do, me too! I am just cautious of it not becoming all about that.

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