I am miserable, no girlfriend, no point of life?

[Anonymous]

I am feeling down and out right now...

The biggest problems I have are:

1. I dislike my career and cannot go back to school

2. Girls don't like me

I feel so undesired by girls, I am 24 and never have had a girlfriend, sex, kiss or even holding hands... It's pathetic, I am a little bit shy... I do try to go out, make small talk, I don't really drink... but girls just don't like me, some find me attractive but I know as soon as I talk to them, they don't like me because I am shy...

My other problem, which I feel is linked to my no girl problem is my career.

I went to school for a couple years, for something I disliked ( I am terrible at my job and dislike it)
So I am stuck working at this job..

My mom is single and so I have to pay bills to support her and myself...

So my job is pretty good paying, so I am able to that, but I am unable to move out or get my own place...

And I have no idea what jobs/careers are for me, I just don't find interest in that many activities, hobbies or fields...

And I am busy with work, after work I am just exhausted and need to rest up for my next shift... it's burning me out...

I feel like, there is not a girl in this world that likes me... They just don't I am so lonely...

If I lift the focus away from girls, what is the point of life?

I have a job, I pay all my bills, so what? I just do this for the next 30-40 years? What is the point of that?

I am just bored, miserable and lonely...

Updates

+1 y

Thank you for all the answers, I wish everyone could have MHO!

I feel a bit better now,

I am going to commit to a new hobby, and just keep going at it...

Going to try to find a better job and research careers that I might like.

Going to save up, and maybe go back to school in the future...

And going to take a break from dating for a little while...

[Negrodamuss]

I can understand your frustration. I've had a similar experience, especially while i was in university. The thing is, things will only change if you put in the effort to make it change. It won't change simply because you wish it to. You're at an advantageous point in your life and in history. Never before was it easier to make a radical change in your life (whether it be completely switching your career, moving to the other side of the planet, talking/courting any girl you choose, etc.

Not too long ago, we couldn't do all these things due to societal and economical constraints. I say you start doing things differently, and taking advantage of what you've got. You have a good paying job, which means you can probably start saving money. As for your mom dude, im sorry to say but she is a grown woman and should be able to support herself, unless she has some major illness that keeps her from doing anything. I mean, do you want to live the rest of your life for her, or do you want to live it for you? Because trust me, she's already lived her life. You can't get much of what you want if you are still tethered to her. Save some money, travel to places where you've always wanted to visit. While doing so, experiment with new things that may interest you so you can figure out what your passions are, and take it from there

Where women are concerned, from what I've learned over the years is that they really do value a guy who has his shit together and seems to be going places/has a future. For one thing, if you start doing more of what i outlined above, you'll naturally feel more confident in yourself. Confidence comes from within, and i find the best way to feel more confident is to have some successes under your belt to draw from which reminds you why you have a right to feel confident. They don't need to be large successes, just things that you're proud of. Basically, if you can become like the most interesting guy alive (you've seen the commercials i hope), you'll be a lot more attractive to women once they learn more about you. Lastly. ill leave you with a video. This guy called James marshall is one of my biggest role models when it comes to figuring out women. If you want to get something out of women (love, sex, companionship, etc) you need to start caring and researching about women want. If you know what women want, you can start giving it to them, which will allow them to give you what you want

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-juyEIgwhGQ

[RexCatholicissimus]

You're coming at this from the angle that another human being is dictating your happiness. I know it's a pretty common and somewhat annoying response but rating your self-worth based around some chick not being into you isn't a good way to approach things.

As a man you're given an opportunity that women aren't, you CAN actually live your life outside of base physical looks and you can strive for some other meaning. I would recommend one in particular but I'll assume it's not the one you want to hear, so at that point I would just say rate yourself by the knowledge you seek or your intellectual prowess.

I get it, you want girls to like you cause it's a nice feeling to know others wanna spend time with you and it's certainly not a bad way to live your life, but other options are available to you and I'd say they're options that are almost exclusive to you as a male. Just my thoughts on it, anyway.

[hairydudesrock]

Find yourself a hobby or something that interests you and join a club where you can meet people and socialise. It's always easier to talk when it's something that is a shared or mutual interest. Or join an evening class. Even walking the dog if you have one is a good way to meet people especially if you join a dog training club. I suffer from poor self esteem and shyness but I push myself to talk to people and initiate conversation.

[Curiousness23]

I don't think you should feel so down, isn't there something you like to do in life? You cannot just simply resume your life to this, and you're 24 years old if you say some girls find you attractive then you can find one, and some girls like shy guys you know ~ :)

[Asker]

There is nothing that brings me joy in this world :(

I feel very down, I am not good at anything, I don't feel like doing anything anymore.

[Curiousness23]

Nahh don't say that, just remember one thing : "people live worse things that me" plus women are just women there are more important things, i've been through this and still think like that sometimes but i fingured like i saw myself so pathetic because i didn't find the courage to even go for a walk, do simple things, enjoy the little things, i like drawing even if i can't draw, running sometimes with music in my ears, singing, i love to sing, having internet friends instead of real people or some shit like that, this is if, life is made of those little things, if you wanna do things you need to stop thinking that way i know it's hard i'm like that too but u move, u just gotta move and get out of this boring routine, just try different things i dunno~ and talk to people only with those who won't judge you and who would support you~~~~

[Asker]

I like that, I have to break my everyday routine that I am stuck in!

And do things that I like, even If i am not good at them :)

Thank you

[Curiousness23]

You're really welcome ! I am really glad if i helped :D :) ;)

[Byakee]

I feel you man, but the purpose of life is not girls and making money, gotta find your happiness, look back to when you were a kid before you had any worries about anything what did you love to do what made you happy, like me I've only had one girlfriend and im 21 but, she's the only girl I've been with, i work all the time and i hate it but im pursuring musci becuase i love it and it makes me happy, gotta find your happiness dude

[Anonymous]

there is more to life than women. let me share a secret with you. even if you have the perfect job and girlfriend you'd still be empty and sad. i know people who had everything and suicided. if you lack true meaning in your life there is nothing that will make you happy and fill the inner void. i found my happiness in God. much more happiness than any person or material thing can offer.
also dont forget its not only you that dont go well with women. women themselves have their own passions, fetishes and psychological issues. its a two people dance so maybe its better for you that you dont get along with the specific kind of women you apporached till now. maybe your tastes have to change and mature... .

[MasterofPlebs]

Ah, you discovered what I did at age 18. I took the initiative from that point onward, and I, while knowing and believing that there is no point to life, am extremely content and pleased with things.

So, I would tell you to do the same. There's not much you can do, but there are some things you can do. Make it interesting, take some risks.

[Decentguy]

i know how you must be feeling right now, all i can say to you is if you can't change anything then dont stress about it, and dont worry about the girl, when the time will be right, it'll happen, or you can use any dating apps to find any girl.

[BertMacklinFBI]

man you are drowning in your own pessimism.

life ain't gonna hand you shit, you want a change in life? you have to start that change.

[Papier]

Try videogames. Worked for me, but only for a year. Maybe you will know what to do after that.

Maybe you will meet someone while playing a game. Who knows. Something is clear though.

30 years of the same thing won't happen.

[somethingoingon]

Make your life better before thinking about girls.

Trust me girls are looking for guys to use. Being unhappy with yourself will push girls away as its an indicator bad for survival to them.

No girl fucks a sad man

[bryon]

Girls do pick up on low self esteem and in almost every case it turns then off

[skeptic007]

well that's why you get no girls your shy
or you are extremely ugly it's one of the 2
but most guys aren't extremely ugly they look like regular guys

[Bluetii]

Totally understandable. What do u do for work? Also have you tried online dating?

[takumii]

Love yourself. Admire the sexy motherfucker you are.

[mrsingle]

In the same boat as you it sucks

[Dred1614]

What career are you in?