Girls, How to get my boyfriend give me a title and buy me more expensive gifts?

I have been dating with my current boyfriend for 5 years. We are both 28 at this time. Our parents and friends know and support our relationship. We are living together and share the bills equally. Although I am JUST his girlfriend, I do all duties of a wife such as cooking, doing laundry, and also buying gifts for our families and relatives on holidays. We split the costs but I do all the thinkings.
Our family are not rich like millionaires but we can afford buying designer brands occasionally. I am employed but he has no income because he is a full time student.

My concerns:
a. Most of our friends already get married and have kids. They keep asking us about ours. He said we would after he graduated and got a stable income. But that will be 3 years from now and there is no guarantee that he will get married with me. In our culture, having a title in a relationship is important especially when we have sex before marriage and everyone knows we live together. My friend suggested me to tell him about performing a formal tradition between 2 families to announce that I am his-wife-to-be. I told him about this idea couple times and he hesitated of doing it. He is committed in our relationship but he is not ready for giving me a title.

Should I push him for this? Should I be angry if he doesn't want to give me a title?

b. He never buys me expensive gifts that cost more than $200. He does not spend much for himself neither. I feel jealous when his sister (a hooker) receives LV, Gucci, etc. from her short-term boyfriends from time to time. She is not committed to anyone but she can receive expensive gifts from people. She also asks her parents (my boyfriend's parents) for her own expenses. I asked my boyfriend to buy me a LV bag (<$2000) and he told me to wait until he gets income. But that will be 3 years from now! And who knows if we are still together until that time?

Should I push him to buy me expensive gifts? Should I be angry if he doesn't?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Stop sounding like an entitled baby. You can go be a hooker too and get gifts from people who pay you for sex, but you don't want that do you? He has a perfectly good reason for not doing these things.. HE HAS NO MONEY. It's a GOOD THING that he's aware of his finances and his monetary capability.

    Getting married without both people being financially stable is a terrible idea. If you want the ceremony that's fine, though from a guys perspective it's like "well I already know I want to be with her, why is this such a big deal" and it probably also costs money that he doesn't have. You already live together and you already call each other boyfriend and girlfriend, those are titles.

    Getting a $2000 LV bag is ridiculous. You don't need it. And just because he can't get it for you doesn't mean that he loves or values you any less.

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What Girls Said 22

  • 1) if you've told him that a title is important to you, but he still won't give you one, perhaps there are other reasons.

    2) you sound like a spoiled child and a gold-digger. just be grateful that he gives you anything at all, as you don't seem to know the difference between needs and wants. in fact, that's likely the reason he won't give you a title- he probably sees how irresponsible you are financially and isn't willing to go into debt for you, ergo you don't have a future together.

    (he probably also thinks that any ring he gives you won't be good enough unless it's the shiniest and most expensive. see #1.)

    probably not what you wanted to hear, but it's the truth.

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  • ...

    This is why men think women are materialistic pieces of shit. You want men to buy you expensive gifts? Become an escort.
    grist.files.wordpress.com/.../mouth-vomit-barf.gif

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  • You sound entitled. Don't do anything in a relationship "in exchange" for his gifts. Do it because you want to. If you don't feel appreciated, break up.

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  • hahah This is why you date rich not down! lol hahaha Jealous will get you no where hun and you simply cannot force a man to give you the world. I had to learn that way with my dad! You really can't change a person mind. Once they made it its hard to negotiate! Trust me I've tried to keep my ex-bf... Hell I think I did everything possible but he wanted to break up and that was it. You simply can't win when someone made a stand. It sucks but that how it is.

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  • you're dating the wrong guy. you are not going to magically turn this guy into a gift giving guy with a lot of money who wants to marry you. if you have already talked to him about what you want, and he is not providing that for you, then you are free to walk away and find someone who will

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  • I think it's kinda concieded of you to expect him to buy you expensive gifts not everyone has 2000 dollars laying around to buy a bag for his girlfriend plus if he has no source of income where do u expect him to get the money from I'm not taking sides cause I don't know you and him or the whole situation but u should be more understanding of that plus if u want the bag so
    much buy it for yourself and don't wait in him to buy it for you

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  • Why should he shower you with gifts? I hate women like you, you're shallow and grasping. Why don't you buy him gifts? What makes you so special? If you want luxury items then go and turn tricks!

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  • A little entitled, are we?

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  • I am in a similar situation but i have no concern over money being spent on me. if anything its the opposite because it makes me uncomfortable when he spends the money even though we aren't married, but it makes him feel good to "help" me. i am concerned about not having a commitment while he is in grad school but there isn't anything I can do except wait that I know of. it makes sense not to get engaged while you are in debt for your education though. maybe your disregard to that fact has something to do with those reservations?

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  • Well, I do not think you should be angry, because anger makes you bitter in time. I think that even though you've talked to him about the way you're feeling, it seems like he still does not get just how bad you want that title. Don't lush it with him, men are weird when they feel like they are being backed into a corner (sorry boys but it's true and you know it! ). Give him some time to finish his schooling. And in the mean time spice up your love life and keep doing what you're doing, you've been together so long now that I believe you have nothing to worry about! I am having the same issue but I've come to the conclusion that I am happy just holding his hand, and if at the end of the day we do in fact get married then that will make me all the more happy. But, everyone is diffent!

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    • Push it with him**

    • Oh, and as far as the gift thing goes, it's always the thought that counts! People sell pocketbooks for 2000 dollars when they only cost like 5 dollars to make in a sweat shop across seas.. ask him to write you a love letter, that's more thoughtful

  • Do you ever sound spoiled. Man.

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  • He's not obliged to buy you those. It's a privilege. You can go be a hooker like his sister if you want such gifts.

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  • Please be a troll, please be a troll, please be a troll...
    On the off chance that you're not a troll, leave the poor guy now, so he can find a girl who is half decent, instead of a whiny, childish bitch.

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  • You sound like a gold digger. And if he isn't ready to give you a title, pushing him will not get you what you want. I suggest you wait if you really care for him. You sound really impatient and like you'e in a rush.

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    • i mean to be fair she said they have been together 5 years. so that isn't rushing but she still sounds petty

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    • I'm not sure she is in school. Maybe she doesn't understand the burden placed on him and that's part of the problem

    • @soupfairy Which is even more of a reason why they shouldn't get married yet. Partners should be understanding and if all she's worried about is herself, then the marriage won't last. Honestly, doesn't sound like his situation is being taken into consideration by her at all. My boyfriend didn't go to college, but even he knows how expensive and time consuming it is. That's why he didn't go.

  • 😂😂 looool @ConsultantIsBack @Joc4position check this out!!

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  • what? him buying you things shouldn't matter at all

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  • Marriage, you shouldn't have to wait till he graduates that would be a great first step. Kids, I would wait till income is stable. Spending money on expensive stuff, I really don't want to sound rude, but as long as he thinks of you and gets you gifts, who cares about the dollar value. I wouldn't even think twice about that, what if he is saving the buy you a ring that is amazing? Don't stress the gifts that's just materialistic nonsense, marriage is what I would push for.

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    • right, like when boyfriend knows I've had a bad day and brings chocolate and cheap wine? best guy ever!

    • @soupfairy agreed.. My boyfriend doesn't have the greatest job right now.. But I was sad and sick so he brought me every single canned soup Safeway had in stock.. Super sweet

  • Become a hooker like his sister and you get the expensive gifts. The solution is in your question.

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  • Are you tripping? You just said he didn't have a job and you want him to buy you gifts that cost more than $200?

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  • Please explain how he is supposed to by you expensive gifts if he is going to school & not working?

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  • I refuse to believe that there are people who put so much worth in material objects. That is quite painful.

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  • Now I ain't sayin she a gold digga but she ain't messin with no broke hitta ! 😂 Stop being materialist go be a hooker if you want that 2000 for a stupid purse lmao typical

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