Worst pick up line you've ever heard?

I just want to hear the weirdest, funniest, most outrageous pick up lines you've ever heard or that someone said to you :) Please & thank you!! :)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • From a website I wil not reveal
    "Roses are red, violets are twisted. Ready or not. You're about to get fisted."
    "Would you help me with my math homework? I think I know a formula. You have to add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide your legs and pray you don't multiply if I am correct."
    “You are almost as beautiful as my sister. But well, you know, that’s illegal."
    "Sorry, I thought this was the men's room. Still, while we're alone in here..."
    "You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."
    "You have a better body than my dead great-grandmother!"
    "You don't sweat much for a fat chick."
    "Hey baby, want to socialize your means of reproduction?"

    "You know, pants are a vestigial organ. Yours look infected."
    "I have a rare tropical disease which will kill me unless I have sex within the next half hour."
    "Bet you 100 quid you can't turn me hetero."
    "The doctor's pretty sure the antibiotics worked this time."
    "You're hotter than my daughter."
    "You have 206 bones in your body. Want one more?"
    "I lost my keys. Can I check your pants?"
    "If you were a woman, I'd so have sex with you."
    "Are you a slave girl? Because you look like you should be."
    "Are you free tonight or will it cost me?"
    "Roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at poems, nice tits"
    "Hi, I'm part Native American, would you like to ride my totem pole?"
    "Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van"

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Most Helpful Girl

  • too many to count!

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What Guys Said 21

  • Wanna play train? You sit on my face while I chew chew

    Excuse me, do you buy your clothes on sale? Cause they will be 100% off at my place 😏

    here's a bonus that I've actually used and it worked lol: If you were a vegetable youd be a cutecumber,

    pbs.twimg.com/.../QqeyOiYT.jpg

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  • my personal favourite: "does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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  • the funniest one I ever heard was.. Went to take my dog for a walk but he did not want to go.. do you want to go for a walk.. lol

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  • Those clothes look nice

    But they'd look better on my bedroom floor
    Oohhhh!!!

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  • I was at a bar with a few guys from work... when an old man walked up to a 350lb guy co-worker of mine and said, "You would look good sucking my cock". We laughed are asses off as my other buddy knocked him out.

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  • "You bring the Netflix I'll bring the chill"
    A guy didn't say this by the way... which made it Weird... hot... but weird.

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  • "So it's your first time in Vegas? Want to have the full Vegas experience lets go up to your room."
    Hooker when I was at the hotel bar. Said no thanks

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  • I'm the biggest lady-killer in Buffalo since O. J. Simpson

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  • Worst pickup line.
    "Hello, how are you?"

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  • "Do you have any Nitric Oxide on you? Good, coz I don't wanna hear NO. "

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  • Are you WiFi.. I feel very connected to you.

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    • LOL :) Sounds kind of dorky but still kind of cute lol :)

  • I got to place a call to Johnny Bravo
    BadPickUpLines (Johnny_Bravo )
    (programming pun)
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RnotacXVAlg

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  • I want to stick my penis in your vagina.

    Strangely enough it worked. Lol :P

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  • If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

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    • I heard that one before lol :) Have you ever used a pick up line on anyone? What was it? :)

    • I have actually and it's the girl I'm going out with atm! XD It was, You know how they say nothing lasts forever? Be my nothing. :3

  • Do you smell carbon dioxide? Because you make me really faint.

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  • You are so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line.

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    • Probably the best pick up line that might actually work lol :) :P

  • "The food here is good, just like what I make at home."
    The only dish she could make was instant noodles.

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  • complete silence

    when the girl is giving alll the signs

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  • Of course I've never received any... but I'm just postin' here in order to show ma respect towards to those guys who hit on ya...

    Yes even if their lines were ridiculous... and even if ya were laughin' behind their backs... at least admit they were brave... brave enough to speak and make a move...

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    • That's what I always say lol :) Some pick up lines actually work on me because they're either really cute or I appreciate their effort lol :) The trick is to deliver it in a very confident manner because otherwise the girl can sense your hesitation and it won't have the desired effect :) I appreciate a good pick up line but some are just terrible lol

  • dont be silly. women dont give pick up lines. not to me at least.

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    • I've never seen a girl deliver a pick up line lol :) I think that's more of a guy thing

  • I think the worst i've heard... and they're sort of related, are the following:

    1)
    There are 20 letters in the alphabet right?
    - No 26
    Oh, I forgot, U R A Q T
    - That's still 25
    I'm gonna give you the D later

    2)
    Looking for a stud? All I need is U, cause i already got the S T D

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    • Aww I actually like those LOL :) Then again I'm pretty easy to impress lol

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    • I love that LOL :) I like the clever ones that aren't super obvious :)

    • :))) I like these too.

What Girls Said 19

  • When I had lived in New York, Apparently the 'New Line' was Not just Words but With... Walking along side of you and is Opening up Friendly convo.
    Following m, e into a store I needed to get something, He kindly Offers "Can I get you anything?"
    I smiled politely and declined as I mosied around and when he saw that I was not Interested in Anything he had to 'Offer' me, he left.
    Good luck and Great question. xx

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  • This is a real thing a man said to me at work:

    "I like your lipstick. I'd like to lick it off."

    Them lines doe.

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    • Lol :) I give them credit for being bold enough to try but it just never works lol :) Ever.

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    • I laughed my ass off when he said it to me. I think I humiliated him by accident.

    • If you'd called his bluff, do you think he actually would have tried it? "Oh yeah? You wanna try it RIGHT HERE, buddy?"
      mahah

  • Worst: "Are you a gem? Because you're still a piece of rock formation at the end of the day. Gems are overrated as hell."

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  • Not a line so much, but the whole situation. At this party, this guy that last weekend hooked up with my friend, wouldn't let me alone. He was all like "You're really pretty. You're probably way out of my league" so I told him, I remember him hooking up with my friend and he said "well she's not here right now"

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    • Ew lol :) I don't think I like him very much lol :)

  • the worst chat up line a guy asked me years ago in a night club while i was getting some drinks for the guy i was with and my self, as he was standing next to me he started to feel my bum and asked did you hurt your ass when you fell from heaven angel? to say i poured a full pint of cold larger over him and told him not so polite kind of way to keep his hands to himself before i shouted RAPE in the middle of a very crowded night club he soon disapearred

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    • That's absolutely horrible. What kind of person touches a total stranger and doesn't even apologize for it? That's disgusting and I would have probably slapped him across the face so hard that my hand would hurt too lol :) I'm glad you poured what you had all over him ahaha :)

    • when i poured my guys pint over him and shouted rape all his mates laughed and made a quick exit with him

  • "Are you a parking ticket? Because you have FINE written all over you!"
    That is probably the worst I've heard... so cheesy

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    • Ahahha :) I don't know. I appreciate a guy who can make me laugh so I wouldn't mind too much lol :)

  • Thanksgiving Day. I was coming back from dropping food off at my sister's house. Ran into a group of guys on the corner of my block. One of them goes "damn, can I get some of your stuffing?" And like clockwork another one followed up with "real shit, can I stuff your turkey?" I'm like you guys have holiday oriented pick up lines? Wtf is this shit?

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    • LOL :) At least they were being festive ahahaha :)

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    • Did you ever hear a pick up line that you liked or actually worked? Lol :)

    • Lol it's rare that guys use pickup lines on me. They usually are trying to get the 411 on one of my friends.

  • There's something on ur butt... my eye's!-_- really mf? lol it's the last line I heard that was a bit sexually so it's bad.

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  • So what about the polar bear?
    What polar bear?
    The one that broke the ice.

    And

    That dress would look great... on my bedroom floor.

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    • Lol :) Those are pretty strange ahaha :) The funny thing is that some guys actually think they'll work

    • The first one I cringed so hard I felt physically unwell haha, then I just walked away!

  • "My doc said im Lacking Vitamin U"

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  • When I was in high school, I had a male friend who use to tell me a pick-up-line a day. The worse one had to be "I put the STD in stud now all I need is you."

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    • Lol unfortunately that one is actually pretty funny lol :)

  • Funniest I've had: guy walks up to me licking his fingers... "You're like KFC, because those breast and thighs are finger licking good"

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  • My name is Adam, is your name Eve?

    I was like... Wtf... And what's funnier is that his name really was Adam lol.

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    • LOL :) That's kind of cute I have to admit lol :)

  • guy: do you believe in love at first site?
    me: No
    guy: ok let me go and come back again
    ... xD

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  • "That dress looks aweful! Take it off, now😉" yes, yes he winked! Lmao

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    • Lol :) Kind of funny though

  • ALL & ANY pick ups lines are bad to me + totally predictable + completely boring.

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  • Do you lick your own pussy, does the cat likes it

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  • Lol that some guy wanted to be my dildo so I can ride it all day, I don't even own a dildo actually.

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  • "You're so beautiful I would eat the corn out of your sh*t". No joke. I wanted to throw up.

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    • That's gross on so many levels lol :) Hopefully he didn't expect that to work ahaha

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