Have you had feelings for someone you don't want to be with?

I am really confused/hurt/sad and overthinking about a girl.

I had fell in love with a girl, she did not feel the same way about me. Unrequited love.

So I was very hurt, and slowly would get over her, then relapse, and that cycle continued.

I slowly saw how incompatible we would be, and we are just very different people and if we did have a relationship it would be nothing but problems.

If there was an opportunity to date her, and be in a relationship I don't think I would go for it.

But at the same time, I still have feelings for her and love her. I am really confused and have never felt this way before.

Has anyone else had feelings for someone they don't want to be with?

Any input into what is going on? Any advice?

Thank you,


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It may be that you genuinely love her but realise its unrealistic to be together. Your love doesn't blind you to reality. You know in your heart you wouldn't be happy together. Sometimes we do love the wrong person , because you can't be together due to having different goals in life, and incompatible in many ways.

    It seems the only thing standing between you both is reality. Your heart hasn't clouded your own judgement.

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    • Thanks for the MHO

    • You're welcome... I was thinking about that... my mind is fighting my heart...

    • Yeah I can relate to that. It's one hell of a battle. I hope things work out for the best for you

What Girls Said 5

  • I guess in a way I have. I just dated someone casually and I knew going in that it would most likely not work, he is way younger. It was weird because usually I like someone a lot or not at all. With him I liked him, but did not have crazy feelings for him. But he disappeared on me when he got a new job and since then it has been bothering me and I have wondered why? I still wanted to hang out and have fun with him, maybe if he initiated a serious relationship I would have, maybe I just assumed he wouldn't want something serious with someone so much older? It is confusing but I feel like a relationship would have been doomed as well. I don't know what to tell you, I am equally confused.

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  • Yeah, I have a crush on a guy who I know is no good for me. I wouldn't call them "feelings", more like this huge desire to be physical with him and a wishful thinking that he will change. I would never be in a relationship with him but can't help but burning inside every time I see him or talk to him.

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  • Yeah, I have.

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  • Why you don't want to be with her?

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    • I did at one point, would have done anything to get her.

      I found out she had a boyfriend, and that she was just leading me on.

  • If you don't want to be with her then there is no point in being sad

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What Guys Said 1

  • Yes.

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