Would you STOP dating someone if your parents told you to?

Why? Or why not?

So here's the thing: I am currently, seriously dating my boyfriend (who's 34 years old) and I'm 21.

So, my parents and family know that I am dating someone and they are mad that I've been hiding him for the past months. They've been pestering to meet him. The thing is, I know they will NOT like him bc of his age. I know it! Mostly my dad. And I don't want them to tell me to stop dating him bc I care a lot of what they think :(

(I also hate hiding him, I know it hurts him) and this was one of the reasons why I've broken up with him before).


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Unless he has serious problems other than his age I don't see a problem w it. Yes your father may be upset for a while, but I think once he gets to know him as a man, especially in how he treats his daughter, I believe he will be ok w it. I understand the Hispanic culture as far as their influence on your life. But you only have one life, live it the way you choose to do so. Your father can only stay mad for so long, especially if he doesn't want to loose his daughter. Is your father older than your mother by chance?

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    • Haha. Actually my dad married my mother when she was 19, and he was 48.
      I know, I know.. he shouldn't care. But I know he will care for my bfs age, mostly bc I am his baby daughter and he will forever see me like that (unfortunately)

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    • Yeah, about that. My parents are divorced. Clearly it didn't work out. Now my dad is dating a woman who is 20 years younger.
      LMAO! So true. Men can be such hypocrites lol

    • * like mother, like daughter*

Most Helpful Girl

  • No i'm not doing this for anyone 😒😒 why?
    1. I'm not a baby and i can be responsible for my choices 😕😕
    2. If he's a good guy then why should i stop dating him just because someone else wants me to 😒😒
    3. If we're really happy and in a serious relationship then my parents should be happy for us not to make some excuses such as age gap or skin color or anything like that 😁😁😁
    4. It's my personal life not someone else's 😄😄
    Anyway you're an adult and you know your boyfriend better than anyone else even your parents and if you're happy then don't leave him for someone and your parents should deal with it. 😳😳😳

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What Guys Said 22

  • No, not me. But for girls is way more complicated...
    Does you boyfriend have done something, or is into something that your paents might like? If yes, you can start with that argument.

    Do you really see yourself with him in the future? Yes? It' a big big biiig YES? Then it has to be done, they will have to swallow it, and he must do everything that's possible to conquer their respect. He can't avoid them, he need to eat with them, do stuff together and help them when is possible. That's the way to go.

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  • My parents would never tell me to stop dating someone, though if they knew that she was bad for me, they would not be shy about telling me how they feel.

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  • I guess that's a benefit of living pretty far away from my parents. They only know what I tell them about my personal life

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  • I know it's easy to think your parents are being irrational pricks for restricting your dating life, but it's not such a bad thing. The world would have a lot fewer welfare queens and fatherless children if bullheaded young people didn't have to have it their way all the time.

    You're better off just introducing your date to your parents to begin with, because hiding them only makes your relationship seem more dubious. The age difference may startle them a bit, but it's more likely they're looking at the guy's character and level of responsibility before all else.

    If I had a child, I would allow them to date who they want, but would make it clear that they're getting kicked out if they get in trouble with the law or have unprotected sex and end up with a half-loser (or whole-loser, really) bastard child. Harsh penalties can often prevent even harsher situations.

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  • No, If I'm into the girl... I would want them to be nice... and if they had a problem... keep it to themselves.

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  • It's my life, they have no say in it.

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  • Hahah well probably not

    I'd say like, I'm going to go hang out with some friends. And then I end up taking the train, to the date

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  • No I wouldn't stop dating someone and you shouldn't other.
    It's your private life and has fuck all to do with anyone else.

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  • Only if I believed the reason why they wanted me to dump her was legitimate. If they just didn't like her and didn't have a very good reason for it then I'd keep dating her

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  • Yes. I wouldn't want to create conflict in my family. Odds are, I'd never become involved with someone my parents wouldn't approve of.

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  • can't like everybody. shouldn't keep you from not introducing him. eventually they'll accept him

    i'm guessing you live at home. if you do well in school, then you can ignore their demands to stop dating him.

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  • you're 21, and its your life. Its your choice. If i were in your shoes, and they told me to stop i would tell them to F off.

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  • No, because I make my own decisions.

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  • It depends how much you love your partner. If just met / casual relationship, I would leave it.

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  • Nope its not their business

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  • You're 21 they can't tell you what to do

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    • Well coming from a Hispanic culture, yeah, they kinda do.

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    • Nah, I get your point. Thanks hun :)

    • You're welcome

  • Nope, my choice completely

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  • No, I'd tell them to fuck off, lol.

    Seriously though, no, it's my decision, not theirs.

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  • Sometimes listening to your parents pays off. You'd be surprised what some parents are capable of.

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  • Yes, I have, and had girls stop dating me for the same reason. How old is he?

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    • I DEFINITELY see a future with him. And yes, I am happy with him. Always in fact

    • Then stay with him. I wish my ex had felt that age and parental pressure weren't as important as being happy.

  • hell fucking no

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What Girls Said 18

  • If you Allow them to Now, that you are Over 21, @melmel1, Rule the Roost with an Iron Fist... They will Always feel they have the upper hand with Any Man.
    You Ned to be your own Boss, now it is your sad Loss, that perhaps the Most wonderful, Most Amazing man you may ever Know... Had to Go.
    Age is just a Number, Not a Reminder, as I told everyone in a Eulogy I had written when Gramps died years ago.
    Find him, Get on the same Page and take him home to Sunday Dinner... With no Rage.
    To Answer your own Question, Yes, when I was Living under mom and dad's roof at 16, they broke me up with a guy because they told me that the High maintenance Three years younger guy who had liked me, would find out about this "No class" One and it would cause friction.
    This was the Last time I ever let them take over and a few years back, when I had gone to Egypt and had married a Muslim, I told them when I had come back to the states.
    Good luck and Take your Life by the Horns. xx

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    • This smack reality into me. Thabk you very much, very helpful :)
      I will take life by its horns

    • And thank you for the Likes.. Hey, Mom and dad, Yikes.:)) xxoo

  • hahah this is why I avoid older guys! But I mean that sucks. Just don't give a fuck and do whatever you want.

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  • No. My parents have repeatedly told me to break up with my boyfriend. They hate him, he hates them. It was important for me to take their reasons on board but I made my own mind up.

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  • No, I wouldn't. However, if you bring home your boyfriend to meet your parents they will have questions that they absolutely should have, but that you should have thought about in anticipation. Things like the obstacles in your relationship that, if you want this to be your future, could put a stop to the relationship. Given the age difference, which in itself doesn't matter, the places you are in life do matter. So that is one things you should heavily consider before you even bring him home to meet your parents.

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  • If my parents told me to stop dating someone I probably would try to convince them to hear my side first. If after that they're still against my choice then I would still date them if I really liked them and hope my parents respect my decision.

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  • if you care for him as you say you should never have hidden him in the first place
    you should be happy he loves you enough to want to meet your family. if he treats you right and loves you your family should be happy for you and if they bring up the age issue flat out ask them if they would prefer a slightly older man who actually cares for you or some one your own age who is disrespectful and only after one thing

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  • I understand you. If I were dating a guy in his 30's I also wouldn't tell my father. He wouldn't like it.

    But I wouldn't stop dating someone because of my parents. They don't know what's the best for me.

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  • Well I would t stop dating someone because my parents don't like him, that could make me go to him even more. I also was once dating someone secretly and it really wasn't good for either of us but we k ew how people would react if we came out in public so we stayed secret

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  • Age gap is a big problem because at 21 you're young and wild but at 34 you're settling down more.
    I didn't stop dating my fiancee when my mom disapproved.

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  • You're 21. They can't control you, you are a legal adult. Take them to meet him, if they like him great.. if not.. I'm sorry but if he truly makes you happy your parents need to know that and you need to be happy with him. Would you like him acting that way with you?

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    • I see that. And yes, I wouldn't like him acting that way with me either.
      Thanks hun

  • Haha no.
    My "super christian when they feel like it " parents never approve.
    Haha.

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  • I'd consider it...
    But at the end of the day I'd listen to my heart.

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  • my dad owns my house so its a hard thing to pick a place to live or my boyfriend

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  • You are an adult you make your own decisions

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  • Nope. Not happening.

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  • I'm 45 and also they like my girlfriend

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  • Definitely at your age, I would take your parents advice. After all, they are looking out for your best interest. The best thing you can do is be upright honest with them. If you have to hide your boyfriend from your parents, it's surely a sign that he isn't right for you.

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