So I went on a few dates with a guy and we really clicked, and I've stayed over at his a few times during those encounters. Anyway, I didn't hear from him after the last time I saw him. At first it hurt a bit, but I moved on and threw myself into speaking to new people, and even had one date (it didn't go anywhere). After 2 weeks I receive a detailed apology text from him, saying his training for a marathon had kept him busy and he didn't want for us to end. I initially dismissed his message, but after 10 days or so I replied saying I wish I'd known sooner if he was going to be busy and I would have been cool ending things there. He sent a long grovelling apology again, saying he was sorry he hurt me and that he was glad I was speaking to him again. He seemed sincere, and to be honest, he seems to have grown some balls and realised his mistake. Anyway, I said I'd be open seeing him again, as I did quite like him and we had a good connection. However, am I making a mistake in giving him a second chance? If he messes up again, I'll move on in a heartbeat.
Most Helpful Guy
Tell him that if he really wants to make a go of a relationship then you need him to understand that you need to be informed of things like that and if he really wants something with you then he has to commit to talkin about things before he just disappears or dose something because in a relationship it's just the right thing to do. Explane that if he's willing to do that your willing to give him another shot. As far as what you need to do forgiving him is important so good for you but it's understandable that you have concerns just keep in mind he is sorry and he is trying so give him at least a little slack. Now I'm not saying don't be a bit cautious I'm just saying give him another shot and if after you said what I told you to say up top enjoy the relationship and him. Just remember to let it go after a while don't hold it in and feel free to let him know how you feel about things. I'm sure you'll be fine I wish you both good luck and that you relationship stays strong. I hope my words have helped; good luck dear.0
Most Helpful Girl
YES, let him in one last time. You sound like a young lady who has a good head on your shoulders, so I'm trusting that you're as emotionally unattached as you say and that your description of this guy is accurate. Just keep this excellent forewarning from @fritz81 in your back pocket - "if he does do it again, I don't think you will move on that easily though." it may seem like you're more prepared because you're en guarde now and you've already let him go once. However, what she said is so true because you're actually putting yourself out there more the second time around since you're required to exercise maturity and understanding in order to make things work - which is one step closer to a relationship, all of which are predicated upon mutual compromise, forgiveness, and trust (here, that he won't fuck it up like before xD).
One note to add from myself and JFK ;) - "let us never negotiate out of fear." Be careful not to spend more time on "not getting attached" instead of having fun and seeing where this goes. Enjoy this time, please! And remember the point of why you're giving him this second chance.
Good luck, hun! Totally rooting for y'all.0