Is it normal to be annoyed at my GF's behavior?

Background:

We work on the same place so pretty much everyday, we see each other.

Scenario:
Almost everytime that we're not together, whenever my FB status gets 'Active' - you know, the green circle on the chat - she asks me "who are you talking to?".

It may seem innocent, and I sometimes don't mind, but this is becoming annoying. I am getting a feeling that she just sits there, waiting for it to get green and bam, ask.
I'm not hiding anything to her, and more importantly, most of the time I don't have anyone talking to - just browsing my wall.

Ofcourse I do tell her whether I am talking to someone or not, but then after, she would show some coldness.

I don't want a workaround on how to hide - I don't need to hide my status on chat.
I just want to know if it's typical to be annoyed when asked this question or is it just me.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Does she ask who you are texting on your phone too? It would be weird if she is only distrustful on fb. Are you friends with exes on there? Did you used to message her and don't anymore? It is weird that she asks you that every single time too. Yeah it would be annoying but if that is the only time she has trust issues it isn't that bad. She could act like a super psycho ALL the time and question everything you do, that gets annoying. Have you ever asked her why she questions that every time?

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    • Nope, she doesn't seem to care much about my phone. Only on FB since it has the "Active" status. Yes, I am still friends with one of my ex, she knows how we broke up and she knows that we stayed in good terms, but the last time I talked to my ex was months before we became together.

      I always message her when I can. I am fond of PC games, and even on a middle of a game, I still message/reply to her.

      And no, it's not all the time - more of 30-40% of the time, and only happens when we're apart.

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    • Yeah, I hope she would see those reasons.

    • Maybe next time she asks? But try not to respond with annoyance. Just say, "Okay. Why do you always ask who I am talking to on FB? I rarely message anyone on there and it comes across as you not trusting me. I go on to check out some posts and get off." She must ask you for a reason, so the best way to figure it out is to figure out why she is asking and go from there.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Hehe... as soon as i saw "we work in the same place"... i just went "yes, its annoying" lol...
    dude, thats insecure to the max... i'd start with a threat for her to back off and if she doesn't, i'd make good on the threat. so next time my light comes on, she can't ask me anything.

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What Girls Said 5

  • I think it's weird that she asks you that.. clearly some trust issues there.

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    • You never asked your boyfriend that?

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    • Has she been cheated on in the past? Sounds like she has some serious insecurity issues. Maybe she suffers from anxiety? Id sit her down and have a calm adult conversation with her and tell her that it really bothers you and maybe suggest therapy (cognitive behavioural therapy really works for this kind of stuff) or medication for anxiety if she needs it.

    • Not that she mentioned. She broke up with her ex (of many years) but there is no cheating involved - at least none that I know of.

      I talked to her about a different problem before - and when she gets all annoyed up or whenever I make a point, she would just say "we better break up" then come the next day, we'll be ok. There are times that I don't want to deal with the "breakup" attitude and just want to say up to her, but I love her.

  • I'd be annoyed too. Privacy and respect is important in a relationship and her actions show insecurity.

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    • I agree. I don't know what I did for her to become paranoid like this. I love her but this paranoia kind of ruins a part of it.

  • Well I can see why you can get annoyed, especially if she constantly and repeatedly asks. Maybe the next time she brings it up you can just sit down and talk to her about it. Reassure her that she has nothing to worry about. As you said, you don't need to hide anything if there's nothing to hide.

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    • It's not repeatedly, it's constantly - almost every time we're apart.

  • If you're annoyed? tell her. Lack of communication kills a relationship so speak to her on that and let her know how you feel.

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  • just tell her to fuck off then

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What Guys Said 1

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