Why is it so difficult to date a white man as a black girl?

I'm a black girl and I prefer to date white men. In fact, I am not attracted to black men at all. But I have a hard time finding white men. I'm not loud at all and I'm usually easy to become friends with and easy to hold a conversation with. So I don't see the problem. Any suggestions?

Updates:
So after reading these maybe I should look somewhere else beside white men, right?


what do y'all think?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Its called competitoin, their is a lot of demand for white men, asian, latino and black women want to date a white man. White men are less likely to reply to contacts.

    Her is the results of dating attittudes on okcupid

    link

    The question relation do you want to dating someone with your own skin color or racial background showed a big difference, between race especailly for black women. Even black men don't really want to date black women, only 11% said they would like to date within their own race.

    Time article "Seeking My Race-Based Valentine Online" feb 10

    link

    "And if recent studies are any guide, relatively few women on mainstream dating sites will bother to respond to overtures from men of Asian descent. Likewise, black women will be disproportionately snubbed by men of all races." Even black men don't want to date black women.

    Some have sugested a genetic explaination, black women have masculine traits and are least desireable, asian men have the most feminine traits and are least desirable. Then their is the social steriotypes and media portrail of black women argument.

    Keep trying its hard but not impossible.

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    • Interesting but makes sense. it just confuses me because I actually get into physical (but not sexual) relations with white men but they back out after a while as if they're afraid. I don't know, I'm really just confused.

    • Dating is one issue, long term relationships, marriage children is another.... maybe they are just looking for friends with benefits or a short term relationship when that doesn't happen they end it....

What Guys Said 10

  • You know, I don't know.

    It's so very common these days to see a black man and a white woman, but the reverse, just doesn't seem popular. I think there are a lot of stereotypes about black women that might scare white guys away... they're loud and bossy, for example or DON'T TOUCH THE HAIR! Also, a lot of black men make it very clear that "their girls" are off limits (never mind when THEY want to date interracially). That can scare a lot of guys off.

    I think it might help just to get out there around white guys and become friends with them first. You may not end up dating them, but they can guide you in a direction where you can. Don't worry - there are plenty of white guys that don't care one way or another about what particular shade you are. You just have to find them, I guess.

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  • I think you should try to be friends with white girls then get introduced to their white guy friends. If you make yourself approachable and make it pretty clear that you're not into black guys then they should start asking you out. Not to sound racist but most white guys won't go for a black guys leftovers.

    Good luck

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    • I've never like black guys or dated a black guy. lol. I've been with other races though but never black men.

  • its probably because your black and if your trying to date a white guy there probably hesitant because your black, so there scared of what people would say and things of that sort, and it could be because they are more comfortable with there own race

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  • if you come to california you wouldn't have a problem, were really diverse. I think your really cute and I know a lot of other white guys who would to.

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    • LOL. funny. I'm actually from california and I had to move to texas when I was 13. I wish I still lived there. = [

    • Ya I've actually been to texas couple times. Dating lifestyle there is a lot different.

  • i don't know I think its a racial profile thing. it also matters what city/state ur from. you seem nice. join myyearbook, or a dating service and just be open and flirty with who you want to be like that with. it will work out sweets.

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  • A lot of white guys don't find black girls attractive

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  • no. don't conform. do what you want to be happy. it will come. don't be impatient. kk?

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  • Nope try interracial dating sites or international dating sites... if you have your heart set on it or you can quit that's your choice..

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  • When you say white what do you mean by that? Their are different types of white, asian, english, russian, german, italian, etc. Do you mean anyone with a lighter skin colour than yours or they have to be say european and not asian. When you a european person say black it means one thing when a black person says black it can mean many things.

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    • Any type of person lighter than me. lol. I know in the middle east I'm not "black." but yea that.

    • Black women have reported more interest from men in europe, and asia, then within north america with online dating. I wasn't aware of the problem till I read some articles on the subject, People outside the usa do not have the same cultural or social prejudice to black women. Media protrails, cultural prejudice, if you have masculine qualities less likely to be desireable as a woman, that includes any race or colour not just black women.

  • Because its difficult to find a white man who wants to date a black girl. Join an interracial dating site, that's where its at...

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What Girls Said 4

  • Most white guys ( that I've talked with) say...They're a little "afraid" to approach black girls because of what they've heard we are like...which is b.s...but they will however feel more comfortable approaching you if you're with white girls..b/c that kinda says to them "hey she may like white guys" lol...i love white guys..and I haven't been attracted to a black male in a long time..white boys tend to mesh with my personality better..plus um hello they're super hot lol

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    • Very true. I'm actually mixed and my grandmother HATES black men so I just tend to go for a more acceptable thing in my family. but thanks that really helped.

    • Yeah that is actually a really good idea. if you make freinds with white girls, it would break the ice and let them know your open to dating white, or at least make them curious about it. if I ever move to the u.s. I think id miss how mutual black and white people are with each other. I really don't see a problem in lettign a black girl know I like her, there is no tention plus they are gorgeous haha

    • You're welcome..

  • white men might prefer to date white girls.

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  • If you like white men, go after white men. There ARE white guys out there that like black girls. I'm guessing it's just the area you live in, so you shouldn't give up...

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  • Sometimes it's the area you live in. I'm mixed, but I look moree black & I'm also only attracted to white men. I've found sometimes white guys don't bother going after black girls because they think that they only like black men. It does help to look online, especially if you live in area where interracial dating isn't exactly the norm, or you just can't find a lot of white guys interested in you.. But there are PLENTY of white men that are attracted to black girls. :)

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