I have problems making close male friends, especially if they're attractive, can this be linked to the fact that I have never seriously dated?

is it normal to have problems making close male friends?

I thinks i do have this problem because with girls, for me, there isn't any possibilities for anything else. I assume they dont find me sexually attractive and I know i dont find them sexually attractive, so there isn't any sexual tension between us hence relationship and dating between us will never happen. But with guys, from personal experience, there is this sexual tension (in a lack of a better word) because They show by looks and body lanuage that they find me somwhat sexually attractive. And since i have never had a guy friend that I have been physically attracted to there is always this little side of me that is affraid they might like me more than a friend.

I know by how im around my current guy friends that it does go away after some months, but the second i see them checking my body out after meeting them it does stress me a bit. Its almost the same with dating too, if i find the guy attractive i get very quiet and i dont joke around a lot, and i feel that i might come of as a bit boring. Normally when i meet people im very talkative and joke around a lot, but with attractive guys i get very serious.

Do you think that be being so closed of around guys i actually like is one of the reasons i never seriously dated?


Most Helpful Guy

  • A good advice for you is to let things happen. Don't worry about what will happen, you should worry about what you want. When it comes to friendships between men and women there's always the possibility that one of the friends will find the other friend sexually attractive, but it does not mean that something will happen.

    I know many girls that I find attractive, I talk to them regularly and normally but I know when to do something and when it's not suitable. I mean, there's no need for you to be nervous because it may not happen as often as you think. If it happens at some point, just be honest with the guy and tell him what you want (or what you don't want) without being rude.

    So, let things happen. If you never try you'll never see that it's not such a big deal ;)

    • thanks, very good advice! I have a tendency to want to control things i have no control over. but like i said, good advice, i should learn to chill more lol

    • I know how it is, I also like to control things, but when we realize that we can control ourselves and from our own control we can kinda control other things... it gets easier.

What Guys Said 2

  • No correlation.

    • okay, good to know actually!

  • No. Its because they already have friends. They don't need your friendship

    • i dont need anyones friendship, but its nice to have friends.. in additon if the were interested in more why not say anything about it?

What Girls Said 0

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