You know what's really sad?

When you have to resort to online dating because no woman wants to date you in real life.
That I have to hide behind a screen to get a girl to even notice my existence.

I don't think I'm bad looking. But it just sucks because I have never had a girlfriend and it's something I really want to experience.

I try in real life, but every time I get to that point the common excuse is, "I'm bisexual", "I only find older people attractive" - which is a slap to the face because I look older than what I really am - "you're a nice friend".

I don't care about the whole friendzone. I understand women don't have to like regardless if you're a decent guy and you're someone they are looking for in someone else.

I have to resort to online, because I'm not that great of a person. I do a lot of things. But I constantly feel like women think I'm not good enough. Even if their only hobby is watching movies, I still feel like I can't compete with other men.

I know it isn't a competition, but it kind of is.

How can I get out of this rut and actually get a girlfriend? A real girlfriend.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe you're not making the right approach. Girls sometimes, well most times use their first impression of you to see where they put you in their life. So if the first impression is rocky and uncharismatic, but then the next time is better you might get friend zoned. But if your laughing and you hit all the right marks when it comes to your similarities and differences then either you have marked question mark until you see each other again ( which is a good sign if plans are made) the second time you meet is more critical because now you need to show based on her character that you fit her needs. For example if she seems like the person who wants a gentleman, open the door for her, compliment her on occasion be chivalrous. Basically on this second meet make sure you show her that you pay attention, so mention something that she said last time, or ask her something that you noticed last time but it went unspoken. For example the last time you talked u saw she had on a necklace and then the next time u see she has the same necklace mention that and ask the question if the necklace means something to her. In this case you show u pay attention, your a good listener if there's a story behind it, and ur careful of her feelings if there's a sappy story behind it.

    • I do do that...
      I give compliments, hold doors, all the works.
      Not because I want to get with her either.

      It seems like the only way to get a girl today is to literally just talk about having sex with her.

      Get girl = girlfriend.

      Most relationships are built off of sex these days and that's all women want at the end of the day.

      In reality, most don't care if you're nice, hold doors, connect, etc. They only care about if you're good in bed.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Unfortunately bud, Girls like 2 things.

    If you dont have either one of them in excess, Im afraid there isn't much you can do, Especially online dating, That literally is nothing more then a place for girls to get ego boosts from 100's of guys messaging them, To which they will respond only to the ones they think look the best.

    Thats just how it works i guess, Sucks ass ik, But..

    I don't know bud, Im in a similar boat so im just going to work on myself for a year or so until im ''good enough'' to date ;).


What Girls Said 2

  • Its okay. There's a perfect girl for you. I have a friend who asked out every girl in the class and not one of them said yes. And he's not ugly and he's sweet. But just like I know someone is perfect for him I know there's someone perfect for you. Just keep being yourself and some girl will love you for you

  • I feel the same way as you do. I feel like I have to resort to online dating in order to get a boyfriend. For some reason guys just don't notice or like me. I don't know why.

    I don't know what to tell you. Maybe join clubs that interest you, that way you will have something to talk about with the women there. Maybe online dating is the only option for people like us.

    • Hahaha I do! I do a lot. I was the president of a club. I hike, bike, water ski, wakeboard, rugby, flag football, soccer. I'm into technology, weird shows, gaming, etc.

      But it's like, no matter what I do or how much I have it's not good enough.

      I think I'm a decent guy. Not perfect and not the worst. I try my best. I'm not bad looking either, according to this website.

      I just feel like I'm not good enough anymore because I'm 22 and still have had no relationships or anything. I do try.

What Guys Said 2

  • You know whats even sadder, you are still behind that screen... :(

  • But aren't women even more selective when it comes to online dating?

    • Depends on what country they are from. I've had a lot of luck in China... 8000 miles away

    • You matched with girls from China?
      I thought it online dating was still somewhat local :/

    • That's what I'm saying... That's how far I have to go haha