He Gets mad If I ever get mad or upset because of something he does. should I end it?

When ever I [19/f] get mad because of something he [ 23/M] did (And would get mad at, if I did it) he just gets mad and starts being verbally agresive.
I'm wondering, can it be fixed? or should I start considering to end the relationship?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • My ex was like that, and she was really controlling and manipulative. So this seems like a huge red flag to me. I understand him getting defensive, as that is just normal when you get angry with people, but it sounds like you know that isn't the case here.

    I think you already know you should end it, which is why you are asking this question. If you aren't even allowed to be angry when he does something wrong, it is probably time to move on.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Full Circle Problem Pattern, I refer to this as, @girlwithmind
    It will Never really Change, And the only way things 'Can be fixed,' Is if You... Fix your Mad Hatter Head to Please him. A No Win situation.
    It's your Choice, The ball is in your own Court. But just realize, That He will only get Worse as he gets Older and more Bolder.
    Good luck. xx

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    • His sister talked to me, she told me that she thinks I'm not comfy with my relationship, because as she sees it, I'm more like her slave than her girlfriend... cause I give him so much (I let him my computer cause he needed it for work, I took him to work and back home cause he has no car, I give him a lot of presents and he couldnt even give me something for my birthday because he said he had no money, but the next day he went and used uber and bought beer and stuff).
      that comment from her is what has me thinking the most...

    • Yes, this is called an "Enabler" and sis is right, you have been this. xx

    • Thank you for the Vote of Confidence. xx

What Guys Said 2

  • start considering to end it because if he is being aggressive toward you he is being way to comfortable with being aggressive toward you which no guy should be. at least i dont think they should be.

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  • Give an example of what it is he is doing. I used to get defensive at times when I was accused of stuff

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    • It's stupid stuff, for example, he gets really mad if I go out and do not tell him, for which I act as I am mad when he does the same, so he gets mad at me and starts ranting about stuff that has nothing to do with it, as an example he literally says that "I am a fucking addict to my phone and I'm being an ass with my actitude"

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    • I dont mean at night, i mean when i go to work or stuff like that

    • @girlwithmind WTH yeah that's messed up then. Maybe he is up to something who knows. I'm like so done with dating myself it's a waste of time

What Girls Said 3

  • I don't know what's up with this behavior in men, but my every single partner got mad every time I got mad at him for doing something wrong to me. So I would also like to know the mystery behind it.

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  • That's a huge red flag. He gets mad because you're mad?

    No. Men I know would be concerned and upset that you're mad. Not mad themselves. They would sit down and try to talk it out.

    He's just getting mad because you back down; am I right?

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    • His sister talked to me, she told me that she thinks I'm not comfy with my relationship, because as she sees it, I'm more like her slave than her girlfriend... cause I give him so much (I let him my computer cause he needed it for work, I took him to work and back home cause he has no car, I give him a lot of presents and he couldnt even give me something for my birthday because he said he had no money, but the next day he went and used uber and bought beer and stuff).
      that comment from her is what has me thinking the most...

    • He thinks he owns you and can do whatever he wants.

      Think of it like a spoiled child. You're going to have to start putting your foot down and KEEP it down. OR he'll walk all over you and won't take you seriously.

      IF you decide to "put your foot down" DO NOT let up. One slip up will make him think he still "owns you".

      Or, you can end it. Honestly, if you are willing to put in the effort, go for it.

  • He sounds immature but sadly a lot of people are like this and never change. Ask him about his behavior and take it from there. If he doesn't feel he's doing anything wrong then yes you should leave him.

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