How do o rebuild trust again?

So I'm not going to deny the fact I've dated a lot of guys but each of them have hurt me in some way, whether they lied, or cheated and so now it's extremely hard for me to trust my current boyfriend not because I don't trust him but because it's hard to trust people in general, so how can I rebuild my trust and also how I do I tell my boyfriend without making it seem like it's only him I don't trust?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You have to learn to let go of the past. You simply cannot drag past BS into a new relationship. If you do, you are being incredibly unfair towards your partner and it sets the tone for a very unhealthy relationship. It's exhausting to have a partner with trust issues. You need to work on this asap and it starts with accepting the past and moving forward and realizing your boyfriend isn't some asshole who should be treated like he's a bad guy. He deserves your love and trust, just like you'd want to receive it in a relationship as well. We've all been hurt along the way. It's normal and happens to everyone. But you need to work though those issues on your own before entering a relationship for that matter.

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    • But how do I let the past go? I've tried many ways and it's just stuck to me like I can't go a day without thinking that something from my past is going to happen again.

    • If you accept your past and decide to make a conscious decision to move forward you won't be so stuck. Remember, it's all a choice. You decide what you want to pay attention to and what will affect you.

What Guys Said 1

  • You havee to realize he is a different person, it helps if he is a different type than those other guys. But honestly you're still so young, thos other guys probably weren't very mature and this new guy is older than them so that helps.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Betrayal is very painful and can define you in a negative way. It's understandable you'll find it difficult to trust other guys when you've been hurt so much in the past. Keeping your guard up is a defence mechanism , because you don't ever want to have to face that pain again

    The problem with that is , it prevents you from ever being happy with any guy. There's no guarantees in love. No one can truly promise to never hurt you or never leave you and let you down. So all you can do is live in the moment. Live for the " here & now"Instead of focusing on what could go wrong, focus on what could go right and what could be... Which is a mutual loving and trusting relationship. Don't end up losing it all because that would mean your exes are controlling your future happiness.

    It would be unfair to your boyfriend to judge him by the low standards of guys who've let you down and betrayed you. Give him more credit. Judge him based on his character and standards... not anyone else's.

    The only way you can really know if you can trust a person is to just trust them. until they give you a valid reason not to

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  • Boys at your age, are just that... boys. I'm not saying this to be patronising, but you're too young and pretty to be worrying about a serious relationship and trusting guys. Have fun, kiss a few frogs, and just chill. The right one will turn up eventually.

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  • Not everyone are same. Try to trust and never make him feel unsecured by your thoughts. Make him happy and make sure you are showing a positive attitude to your new boyfriend. Okay?

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