Would a guy stop talking to you when everything was great before the first date?

I've been talking to this guy for nearly a week. We weren't expecting to have so much in common. We would talk for hours because we both worked the same work schedule. We spoke about our views on relationships and it seems like we were practically assuming that we were already perfect. He even gave me little nicknames. We were on the same page about wasting time when seeking someone out and I was honest about how he was the only guy that I was talking to. We got really close and planned to meet that Saturday.

The date was great. He hugged me when we first met. We had nice conversation.. nothing awkward. He kept insisting on me ordering another drink or to look at the dessert menu. He went to use the restroom twice; he had been drinking. He came back the second time and said that he had to go because he wasn't feeling well because he was still ailing from having his wisdom teeth removed a week earlier and he didn't take his medication for it. So he paid and the evening was cut at around 10pm. We walked me to my car where we stood there for about twenty minutes just randomly talking about things. He hugged me twice.. once when he was attempting to say goodbye and a second time for real. Mind you, it was pretty cold and windy outside. After that when he walked away he mentioned that he would see about hanging out Sunday or that he might be up to chat later tonight. I came back home from hanging out with my friend at around 230am. I texted him.. "Had fun :) I hope I was worth the sushi lol". He was online on YIM and this was when we usually chat so I thought it would be cool. We both joke around like that so I didn't see a problem with it. After I sent it he logs of YIM. I sent him another text over 12 hrs later but no response. I also found out that he is technically online but offline on my YIM which means he either blocked me or stealthed me.

I pretty much figured he has written me off but I am very confused when everything was going so well before. I don't know if he is playing the 3-day or however long waiting game, scared off, talking to someone else or just found something that made him to decide to never contact me after that first date when before the chemistry was there, we were making plans, and he was blown away by all the things we have in common which are pretty unique compared to usual couples. I would just like to know if I did or said something wrong. Maybe I was just too caught up in the moment to realize something on that date. Any help would be appreciated and I will give any details that are needed.

He knew what he was getting into. He had seen my pictures and even being on webcam. I was no different than I was online or through a text. He also is 30 years old so I doubt he would go this low to just stop talking to me.


Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. He decided you aren't compatible but didn't want to say it to your face.


    2. You're not the only girl he's been talking with and decided to focus his attention elsewhere.

    • Age has nothing to do with it. He could be 50 and act like he was 17. In fact, most guys do...

What Guys Said 5

  • Even still, sometimes things are different once you meet. Also, maybe he wasn't totally honest with you, and maybe you weren't the only girl he was talking to.

  • Did you two meet online? It sounds like everything was great before you met because all either one of you had going for you was your personalities. Now, when you met faces were put to the words, that's when it sounds like things changed for him. Maybe you weren't what he was expecting. And sometimes, the vibe you have before you meet, isn't the same when you meet. I'm speaking from experience because I was just in the guys position.

  • It sounds like he just flaked. I came to find out apparently its normal for some people after one meeting or even not meeting that they feel its not necessary to be an adult and call or at least one way or another let the person know they aren't interested but rather ignore the person. It may be normal for them but that's by no means normal for me, if you are over 18 technically we are an adult right? but yet they can't have they common courtesy and just say hey I am not interested or whatever. So after I came to realize this is what girls do who are immature and have grown up yet its by no means any girl I want to be with and I have to assume guys do the same thing...so as I said he flaked and you probabbly won't hear from him again.

    Then again he could have someone on the side, or because he is shallow he found something stupid and small he just focused on about you and that was enough for him to lose interest...anything is possible as stupid as it is.

  • just another flaky character...don't waste your time to trying to wonder what happened...


What Girls Said 3

  • this sorta thing happened to me. I think sometimes guys are just stupid and they change their mind but don't have the guts to tell you. It doesn't mean you did anything wrong...but maybe yall just weren't meant to be.

  • He was just trying to be nice. Guys tend to hate rejecting girls. But hate to put it bluntly, if he doesn't contact he's not interested. In my experience, I tend to make guys work for it... Ie: don't be the first one to text! Let him chase you.. Guys like that.

  • I had a guy do this to me, turns out he was talking to his ex-girlfriend the whole time! He had said they broke up a year ago little did I know it was 3 months before that. Something fishy is def up, I bet there's another girl in the pic or an ex. I'm sure it has nothing to do with what you did or said, guys do this kind of stuff all of the time to girls. They never have the "balls" to actually say what the reason is so they pull a disappear act in hopes you get the message. Don't be surprised if he pops up again, and if he does don't give him the time of day trust me it will be the same.