How to be happy being alone?

I was crushed by my first love, and that completely changed me. Now i hate being alone, i must be talking to a female at all times or im depressed. How do i deal with this?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I understand how you're feeling, I was the same when I experienced my heart break, but he and I had a terribly unhealthy relationship.

    It's not that easy in dealing with it. After my ex left me, it took me about 5-6 months to completely get over him, and yet sometimes I still miss the memories of him and wish things didn't end the way they did.

    Now, I suggest you allow yourself your time to grieve over the loss of the relationship and the pain of your heartbreak. Maybe this will only be a few days more till you begin to feel better, a month, or even a year. Once it's past a year, that's when I find it to be unhealthy grievance.

    Throughout the time you grieve, allow yourself to be selfish. If you wanna chow down on a pizza by yourself, go ahead. If you'd rather watch netflix than go to a wedding, don't feel bad and learn to say "no".

    Also, throw yourself into your hobbies. Intensify your focus on the things you enjoy, lose yourself in the joy your hobby brings you. Allow your hobbies and yourself to be your only concern for the next while.

    Maybe listen to some sad music [maybe such as "What hurts the most, by the rascall flatts] thats what I did. I wrote A LOT, I wrote letters to him he'll never see which I still have, over a year later, I wrote stories of pain and heartbreak.

    Now, do not allow your grievance to consume you, you will become much more depressed than what you already are. Trust me, everything will get better, and things may hurt now, and talking to a woman at all times may be what helps to fill your heart, but that's not healthy.

    A womans attention may only fill the cracks in your heart with water, it'll leak and you'll be desperate for me. It is up to you to help mend yourself.

    I'm here if you need to talk to anyone, and I hope this helps at all.

    I believe in you. <3

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Why the fck is your confidence dependent off of other people? You sound insecure af OP. You need to work on yourself before you get back in a relationship. You also need to stop playing the sympathy card saying "I was crushed by my first love" .. Nobody really cares and you aren't a special little flower because of it. Literally every fcking guy goes through what you went through. Stop acting like a weak little insecure beta male and start creating your own life.

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    • what a lovely way to put it

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    • But bro they actually gave me advice. Please reread what you said. All you did was tell me to stop. Thats it. I asked HOW to stop. How to DEAL with this problem. Obviously i have to stop, thanks for pointing that out. Thats why i asked the fcking question. But HOW. I'm not trying to be a dick, but you were a dick, im just retaliating. How do you know how insecure i am based on a 2 sentence question? These are the assumptions im talking about that you keep making. Its the internet dude. Seriously, lets be done here.

    • You have to recognize the root of the issue. But yes.. we're done. You don't want to change anything you just want to bullshit and get get sympathy.

What Girls Said 2

  • Do things you like and have fun. Start associating alone time with something cool or entertaining.

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  • Start dating! Who says you have to be alone

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    • (Sorry anon, I can't comment on the opinion I wish to)

      @Fearless_banana

      Well... As I agree with you, you could have worded it a lot nicer.
      He is asking for help, not sympathy.

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    • @Fearless_banana I get it, and I understand that.

    • @SweetHomicidalQueen I like how he agrees with you, when i told him the same, but wanted to argue. lol

What Guys Said 6

  • You sound very needy, this is one of those traits that tend to drive them away from you.

    To be happy being alone? You mean single. You just learn to not give a fuck and become indifferent about being single or alone anymore.

    Even if that means eventually being a very stone cold, spineless, uncaring or stoic kind of person.

    Just focus on the logical and do everything you can to filter out the emotional and you'll be alright.

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  • hobbies

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  • Get a turtle.

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  • there's nothing wrong with being alone, just like what fearlessbanana said dont base yourself off of girls, do what YOU WANT to do. relationships dont give you happiness you give YOURSELF happiness.

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  • Get a few friends with benefits.

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  • Go on chat sites to talk and just enjoy being single for now, just remember now you can what you want when you want when you are single

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    • Except for be with someone who loves you and cares that you exist. Can't do that. You can do everything else though!

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    • Exactly, its a great feeling, but only for however long it lasts...

    • Yeah I can handle the bad part for quite a while since I have just been through that

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