I Don't Have A Relationship And It's Making Me Feel Like A Failure, Is This Normal?

I have an apartment, a career (not job), take care of myself, my own car, but it's just I have no one to share it with. And at my age (26), I feel like I'm failing. Do guys even find independence attractive? I'm not a feminist and while I know I don't need a man, I really want one. My friends are married or engaged and having kids and I'm just over here chilling with my dog playing PS3 on the weekend and eating pizza. The most annoying part about it is that I know some of my friends are not good girlfriends. They play games. A lot. I mean, A LOT. As in, they message me and ask how to 'test' their boyfriend/husband or complain about all the wrong things their boyfriends do and don't do, but what actually discuss it with the boyfriend person. They don't compliment their boyfriend/husband or buy him anything. They just... are. They do nothing except exist. Is that what guys like? I go to bookstores and the gym and library and coffee shops and what have you, so I don't just stay in and do nothing, but I feel like a failure. My outlook on life looks extremely lonely. What am I doing wrong?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • dont concern yourself with is it normal or not
    just dont stuck with the wrong one having a baby, then you won't think being single was a failure

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    • Good point, I am very happy I don't have kids right now

    • i dont think having kids in this planet is a right idea
      but at least make a baby with the right one if u have to

Most Helpful Girl

  • I read your post and lots of the comments and conversations.
    I think your success has been your priority. This time, switch and make relationships your priority. I'm sure if you can plan and perform around your job/education, you can do the same for a relationship. It's the exact same dynamics, only with different raw material.
    1- come on, post a picture for us in your most becoming outfit, but blur out your face so we can just get an idea about your figure. Workout clothes are the best. I'm not saying looks are 100%, it is a factor, but it is a very flexible one. but I'm really curious with all of your descriptions, and I want to know what we are working with. Please note: you can be the most attractive girl on the planet, but if like they said in the old days you are not "out", you will never meet a soul, good or bad
    2- you seem already emotionally satisfied with your pet, games, and job. And in reality those things are very absorbing. So if you are not interested or to some extent hungry for human contact, naturally you will not be sending out the right signal for people's radars. You are hiding from the world in your own private comfort zone. So you will hardly attract anyone.
    3- are you a virgin? If you are, it's likely that you probably feel wrong and negative about sex, and that mindset subconsciously makes you push guys away because they are potential sex material.
    4- considering that you have most of your ducks in a row at the age when most people aren't half as successful as you, it is likely that you are a perfectionist, and you either don't know that relationships are messy things, or you subconsciously run in the opposite direction when things begin to look like they might get out of control.
    5- post a poll on this website and ask about guys' opinion on dating black girls. I would love to see the results so if you could post the link as an update here, it would be nice. You could later post a poll with the faceless picture I mentioned above.
    6- don't ever make the mistake that if you are the perfect human being, that guys will be naturally attracted to you. It doesn't work that way for a few reasons:
    A- there are other girls out there, hence lots of competition, and plenty of them utilize pretty unfair manipulative techniques that actually work on guys, because all of them are shallow (as some of the other opinion owners have also mentioned), and if given the choice...

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    • ... they will surely go with the dumb, flirty, manipulative girl rather than the wise & perfect one
      B- watch the movie called "The Ugly Truth". I love the line where the guy says:"... but I also know about lust, seduction, & manipulation - things you know not of."
      C- put yourself out there instead of waiting for the right guy to find you. Introduce yourself at least. Make sure everyone at least knows your name and your most important strengths. Find out how to ask guys out or how to get them to ask you out. Because while you are waiting quietly to be discovered, all of the good guys are being taken by other girls.
      7- I know a website called meetup. There are groups all over the world getting to know each other. Join it. It's really fun.

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    • P. S. there is no such thing as the right guy. You will always have to compromise one characteristic for another, so make sure you have priorities, not a checklist of equally important items.

    • Mho right here

What Guys Said 48

  • I know the feeling, I went through that. It may be you don't have dating skills, you may be projecting the wrong energy (e. g. "life looks extremely lonely" = needy = run). have to see photo to see if something going on there, but I doubt it.

    Need to put effort into dating.
    Read Mars and Venus on a Date for ideas.
    Join match making service ( professional... possibly)

    Playing PS3... get rid of that and go on more dates... so what if they bomb... plan to throw out 99% of what you find for the 1% that are good.

    Do guys like to be treated terribly... no. your friends sound pathetic... honestly...

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  • Are you actively looking? The biggest frustration I have since I started dating after my unwanted divorce is that most women (not all) don't want to make the first move. They will complain and bitch about how there are not guys out there, but they don't go out and try and get one. I would love to have women come after me the way I am expected to go after them. I am in a sucky position in that I cannot afford to date. Another great thing about being a woman in the dating world is you get everything for free. And it isn't the first date that is that big a deal. My last couple of "meeting" dates cost less then $20. But it is the 2nd, 3rd... dates that pile up. Until you get to the point of being comfortable enough to just hang out at home, or she is ok with just going to the park for a walk, it is at least $150-$300.
    If your lonely, get online. POF is excellent, Tinder is also although it gets a bad rep, there are others. Make the first move. Guys love that.
    FYI. If I ever found out my girlfriend "tested" me, it would be the last day we were together. There would be no discussion, it would be over.

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  • You meet many dumb people in the world. Shallow people, both men and women. Don't focus on them. You see further, remember that.
    I'm 20, I have never had a girlfriend. People say I'm good looking, nice and intelligent. I ask myself often what I have done wrong too. How come no one shows interest, how come no one comes to me? How come I can't get myself to seek someone?
    I personally like an independent woman, a woman who can make decisions and have principles she follows. But hey, every guy is different.
    If my life keeps going like it does, I will be single for at least 5 more years, and in some way that seems nice. It's what I always had. In another way, it sounds sad. You know, those moments where you just want to feel some affection, want to look into someones eyes, feeling that mutual love and attraction. It's human to desire something like that. My advice; follow your heart. Go where it leads you, and someone WILL eventually come along. Don't be so wrapped up in "when" and "who". He will show up, and just like you. You won't have to shape yourself for him, believe me. I believe people like you and I, who don't jump into meaningless things, will eventually end up in the best places.

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  • So you are one of the ones that is 'sane' and 'REAL' and doesn't play games, respects yourself, your accomplishments, and you are quite a bit above average 'intelligence' if not also, 'social intelligence' recognizing their issues!
    I'm very much like you, but a bit older. I would rather be with someone, for the right reasons, like I really like her, we share interests, and we get along, than be with someone for the wrong, 'faking' a relationship, hoping she doesn't get pregnant, accidentally, and end up in that kind of situation.
    Just be confident that you are just fine, as you are, and maintain your values!! You will hate yourself if you give in, fool around with some irresponsible idiot and accidentally get pregnant, and he takes off!!
    It's ok to be single, and focus on finding the 'RIGHT' one!!
    Try to meet people at the bookstore, or the library!! Just casually pretend you are looking for a book on the shelf where the cute guy/girl is, and just start talking!!!

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  • Take a lesson from your friends in what not to be as a girlfriend or wife , because these are the kinds of girls I would ghost and never shed on tear before during or after. If they aren't contributing to a relationship then they are only taking away.

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  • your not approaching any guy you want, your friends seem to of been approached by the guys and didn't really want them, dont be like your friends.
    i want a girl who actually wants me and wants to be with me, cuddle, have sex and do sexual things and be in love and show it. and not sell out drama, but i dont want kids, that ends up making relationships fall apart, cause you can't concentrate on each other but the kid, and it seems your friends are experiencing that, im getting a vasectomy soon so i won't have to worry about that if i ever get to have a girl

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    • I have approached guys I liked and they all were taken or not interested. One was actually married and I didn't know it because he never wears his wedding band because he's a mechanic.

    • just keep trying you'll find him

  • Sounds like your friends are typical women.

    And somewhere, there's someone that wonders why I don't bother with relationshits...

    Men don't care about independence. We don't care what kind of car you drive, how 'successful' you are in your make-work 'career', how many countries you've been to, or any of that garbage. In fact, most of it is a giant red flag to men with a clue. If I'm talking to a girl and she wants to tell me about her 'amazing' career, I know she's going to be a pain in my ass to deal with. If she goes on about how many countries she's been to, I know she's "sampled the local wildlife" a few hundred times, and I'm gonna nope the fuck on out of there.

    Personally, I consider it success to not be in a relationshit. But I've discovered that I really, REALLY enjoy the single life, and since the typical woman is just like your friends, the only use I have for them is sex. And I don't need a relationshit to get that.

    Look, the best thing you can do is whatever makes you happy, okay? If you enjoy pizza and PS3, then by all means. Well, maybe consider upgrading to a PS4. But don't buy that new Star Wars Battlefront, it sucks ASS.

    Do you approach and flirt blatantly, or are you passive? Being passive really won't get you anywhere. Believe it or not there are quite a few guys out there that are REALLY oblivious when it comes to chicks flirting. I've been guilty of this more than a few times myself. My best friend had to point out that his niece, who was 16 years younger than me at the time (me 36, her 20) was practically leaving a snail trail when we met.

    Be proactive, and in the meantime, find enjoyment wherever you can. And don't dwell on the whole relationshit thing. Definitely don't judge your success or failure in life on whether you're in one.

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    • Apparently you can't edit posts...

      I MEANT to add, after the things men don't care about, the things we DO care about.

      Don't be fat.
      Be pleasant to be around.
      Be loyal.

      Those are the biggest three.

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    • Lol, I'm not fat, I am loyal, and I try to be pleasant as possible, though 'pleasant' seems to differ from person to person.

    • I call them relationshits because that's what they are. Shit.

      I agree on sharing funny work stories but that's about it. Most people who aren't in my line of work wouldn't understand most of what I might talk about, and definitely wouldn't get our humor. It's almost like being in the military again.

      There are probably some men that prefer a woman that's not successful. Personally, I want a woman to be able to pay her bills and pay her own way. Other than that, whatever. But I've learned from past mistakes, and now I don't buy women anything, nor will I bother with one of these "corporate career" bitches. They think their desk job shuffling papers makes them better than me. I mean, I only have an engineering degree that I don't use, and do a job that I love and make excellent money doing it, but I get dirty and sweaty so whatever. I think a lot of guys don't really think about the career success thing too much, until it starts interfering in the relationshit.

  • It would help to know what you look like, because that often plays a role. For many reasons which h I won't go into, guys are approaching women less. New Marriages have been declining for quite some time now, at least in the US. So you need to put up your A game if you want to snag a quality guy. Not being a feminazi helps, and being independent helps too. But we don't live in an era where you can just walk into a coffee shop and have a guy straight up approach you. It's a rare thing. Most people end up with someone they met at work, or a friend of a friend, which is terrible in my view, but that is life. Sometimes, if you want something in life, you've got to go out and take it

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    • I can't post my picture on here because of my occupation. But to give you an indication, I'm 5'3, 170lbs. (most of it's muscle from working out, I'm a size 12 dress), lighter skinned, black... I don't know how to describe myself. I do think my ethnicity is a big reason I'm single.

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    • For over 10 years I was a toothpick and you'd never known I weighed 220 @ 6'. I was an infantryman and physical training ramps up muscle density that weighs more in mass than fat or body tissues. Height to weight ratio has nothing to do with fitness or appearance unless there's a lack of mass between the ears. Are people lacking intelligence? Why, it hurts?

    • @MegaSmile People on this site aren't educated. My personal trainer is 155 and my height and she is really small, but it's all muscle. People who don't work out or are active don't get that unfortunately. Plus, I've been underweight before. And it wasn't anymore attractive. In fact, I got less attention because I looked like a kid my entire life. It's only the past couple years that I looked like I was even close to my 20's and that's because I put on weight.

      But remember, these are people who still believe in the BMI chart.

  • No, trust me your a way better thing then your friends. But the thing is, you know guys are always complaining because girls make the "wrong" choice and date jackasses over them. Well guys do the same thing. We date girls who are not that great because hey she has big boobs or something really stupid. Hang in there and besides, why spend money and time on some guy. So much in life, go fishing, go to the movies, visit Argentina and hook up with some hottie lol.

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  • It's a normal feeling but totally NOT true, you're not a failure and actually very smart for not "settling" for just anyone. Yes there are guys that love independent women. So many people (such as some of your friends) are in bad relationships and that aren't good for them or healthy. They will be divorced in time mark my words, especially acting the way they are. There are LOTS of single people like you in both genders that just haven't found the right person. It's not your fault! Don't settle.

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    • I'm 39 and the same as you. You're only 26, lots of time yet to find someone.

  • I've never been on a date, and I've never had a full time job that paid well enough to live on, and most things in my life have been for nothing, don't worry about it. Just keep going, make a few changes maybe like going out more often than you do, join a team or club or something

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  • Honestly many guys probably do like what your friends are like, they like passive women that they can support and women like to be passive and be supported. And it annoys the shit out of me hahaha. I think you sound awesome, I would try dating you (or someone who fits that description. although I don't really like pizza or dogs so I don't know..). I personally don't really want to be with someone who isn't interested in being their own person outside of the relationship, but a lot of people seem to feel different than me.

    But anyway it seems kind of normal? I'm basically the same way. I have an apartment and a car and a nice job and I'm healthy and hike mountains and stuff like that. But like you, I don't have anyone to share it with which is honestly has been making me a little unhappy with my life.

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  • When I was your age I felt pressure from everywhere and the people I thought were my friends I began to question whether or not this was more convenient or chance for everyone. I was so confused. I did a hard reset on me. Aside from deciding to do a much needed overhauling upon prayer, reflection and prayer; nonetheless, I decided (due to a belief I was casting serious problems socially with friends as you said play games") I wasn't going to entertain people and dating in ways that are reckless and potentially harmful. I thought I knew what I believe to be friends which should inspire and reciprocate friendships and love. I almost forgot my reliance on Christ. That went well! I have good friends that exceed my expectations and even some of my old friends transcended what I now would consider adolescence. As I began I reestablished a connection and friendship with Jesus and I would say almost every fell into place by grace with an exception of my own hand playing a part in more of what I like to consider life lessons. I grew in ways I thought were unimaginable. As it turns out I married my best friend on this course. Every once and I while I pounder and feel a little jeer of joy for what ended up then not such a little inclination turned into really being a huge decision (especially when I look at our children). I can only hope the best for you and God may guide your heart and mind.


    I saw you enjoy PS3 and pizza. Ditto, those are my vices and hard to imagine not liking PlayStation and pizza.

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  • Well, to be exact, I'm 26 as well but you on the other hand, are doing far much better than I'm doing. I'm 26, will have spent almost 10 years for my bachelor's degree, I have no career yet, I've never been on a second date so I'm still single, I actually have my own car, but I had help with that. So I think you're doing fine. You have good things going on. Maybe you're comparing yourself to others around you that are in serious relationships or are settling down. I was going through that and I'm still kind of am. It seems like you're in a good place and eventually, a guy or woman (don't know your sexuality), will come your way that'll give you what you've been looking for.

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  • I know how you feel. it's difficult and most people who are in relationships or married don't realize how lucky they are. they take their partners for granted. I don't know you but I would keep trying. no matter how hard it gets everyday, never stop pursuing what you want.

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  • I don't think there's anything wrong with you you just need to make more efforts to meet a guy maybe.

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  • Good lord honey ! There is nothing wrong with craving love... and I like an independent mate as it helps me too... as someone who believes in love and has not yet found it... I will not give up even though my chances and prospects are narrow I believe we all need it... you wanting a man is good and not needing is good. If a man finds a woman who loves him he finds the most precious gift of all. hugz n smiles I wish you much success on your quest for love.🍀🐶🍀
    Ects

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  • Your happiness is entirely based on how you feel on the subject. No one here can make you feel better for being single if you don't like being single. I personally enjoy the single life, it's very liberating for me to be my own person and not have to base my life around someone elses worldviews. If you're unhappy being single then go out there and find yourself someone to spend the rest of your life with! Is independence attractive? Absolutely (for me at least) you'll be hard-pressed to find someone who won't like you because you're independent.

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  • "Do guys even find independence attractive"

    I guess some do, not any that I know, its considered a basic thing in everyone's lives now. Maybe take your friends as an example of what not to do, if all you do is criticize your SO you may find that you don't have one after a while. Unmarried men will jump ship and married men seem more likely to just clock-out and stop caring.

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  • I do not know if it is normal for females, but you sound like a female version of me when I was your age.

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  • Maybe you're too focused on being perfect. I'm intelligent, tall, kind, handsome, loving. My crutch is that I'm too chubby. But there's women marrying 400 lb truckers who got their GED.

    We both have to stop overvaluing perfection, and just go out and meet people.

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  • I've been single for 11 years (and 43 next month). You get used to feeling like a lonely loser sooner or later. I got used to it after 5 or so. As far as what you are doing wrong, it's all about attraction. If no one is walking up and saying hi then they either find you unattractive or are shy. Sometimes the female just has to start the ball rolling to find out which rather than waiting on the males to do so.

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  • You're still young and you seem like a great girl so I wouldn't worry. You have plenty of time to meet someone

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  • I dont find independent women attractive and most guys I know dont either because women with careers all this seem very masculine which is a turn off and screams feminist, bitchy with bad attitude issues which are unhealthy. Feminine traits which attract men to be in a relationship with a woman are housewives like nurturing my kids, cooking, cleaning, making her self pretty all day long and maybe she has a job working with children or hairdressing etc.

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    • Well, I'm a teacher, so that's working with kids lol

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    • I get thats your opinion, but its pretty unrealistic to expect a girl not to have a job. If an independent woman is unattractive to you, then how would she support herself? lol like would she be living in a homeless shelter? section 8 housing? living with her parents? lol i really hate arguing with others about their opinions on their comments but this honestly bafflled me

    • I'm also a baker and cake decorator on the side lol, I don't know what's more feminine than that

  • I HATE when girls test their boyfriends.

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  • You probably have unapproachable body language, and that is why men don't approach you.

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    • What would that look like?

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    • You fix that by smiling more. :)

    • Guys are drawn to "feeling" good just like women. there is an energy conveyed, body language that says, I'm available, I'm ok on my own, come get me, talk to me. It is content, but not overly aggressive. It's really a state of mind not acting. It is being grounded, self confident. once you have that, it just shows up in your presentation.

  • Nooo there's nothing wrong with that, you probably spent so much time focusing on your career and future that you didn't invest any time for your personal life or relationships.

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  • You're doing nothing wrong, there are many factors here and it doesn't mean it's your fault. Maybe people are too shy to approach you, perhaps they think you're in a relationship. You could try approaching them, you sound like a great person so they can't really say no :)

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  • I think you have kind of isolated yourself a bit much. It sounds like you have a lot to offer. Ask your friends for help dating, or try and use a serious online dating site to find a partner.

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    • I asked my friends and they just kinda laugh at me and won't help, they said I have to be patient like they were, even though they met their partners 6 or 7 years ago.

      I should probably be more clear. When I say 'friends', I mean I have their profiles on Facebook and maybe talk to two of them on the phone when I can get them on the phone. And when I can, they end up talking about themselves most of the time.

    • Those aren't real friends
      I am sorry. I would try networking, and socializing with new people
      You have to take the initiative to meet new people

      Seems like you need a companion and some trustworthy friends

  • Well I know as a single guy, when I see a woman who's got her life figured out, nice car, good job, dressed professional, I automatically assume she's in a serious relationship, if not married. if your serious. Get on a dating site. This will tell every guy on there that your available and they will come knocking at your window. Either that or go out to a bar with a friend or two and look around for someone you find attractive and give him a look, he'll take the first step and you go from there

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 19

  • What your doing wrong is worrying about other people. Stop it already. I just came back from my friends wedding and that doesn't have to do with my choices. You also shouldn't have to worry if guys find you attractive or not. And if you have friends like that, that is also very off putting for guys to want to stay away from you. No one is going to want to stick around with bad company. Stop looking at your age as a factor. Age has nothing to do with it. Also why do you want a man? To find somebody to get married to, to have sex, or a one time fling? You have to be serious about your relationships and not fool around.

    However what you feel is very normal, and you don't need to feel ashamed of it. All I can say is that if you really want to succeed in dating, you have to know what you really want and need before hand. My friend was dating her now husband for a year and 5 months. They knew they wanted to get married to each other in 5 months. And actually made the commitment to get married this February. Got married about two weeks ago. And yes, both are very happy with each other. She is 24 and he is 23. During the dating stage they worked on what they want to accomplish. That means they were not sexually active with one another, fooling around in any sexual manner, focused on they're jobs, and talked about the future. And the best part is formulating a plan to make it happen. Now everything that they had wanted is coming to past. So this is what you need to do as well. Knowing what you want and need. You need to know critical questions as to what the other party is expecting out of you during the first three dates. No more then a month. Someone who share the same goals as you, and not someone who wants to tear them down because they're not happy. Also you have to be a whole person before hand and be already happy with your life. Not miserable. Or else the relationship will fail and you take that as extra baggage. This is my advice to you. Best Regards

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  • No disrespect AT ALL but I am here to be honest.
    I just saw a comment where you said you were like 5'3 and 170? That is probably your biggest reason you don't have a relationship and dont have the best luck with guys. Guys are extraordinarily shallow. If the looks dont attract them and your body isn't hot then they are not even interested in anything else. You're not obese but you dont have that fit hot body that guys like. I'm not saying that no big girl can get a guy. but you said that you are independent and a good woman and have your shit together right? And you aren't into settling like your friends seem to be doing right? Well if you want a high quality guy you are going to have to slim down a bit to increase your chances at getting him. There is so much competition these days, there's so many baddies walking around and guys have their minds on the fine sexy girls so they aren't as apt to date a woman whos overweight just because she's good in every other area.

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    • I am fit actually lol, I play soccer and run track which results in larger thighs, which I've always had unfortunately. I went to my doctor and he said in order for me to be under 155, I'd have to lose muscle, which I'm not doing. The number on the scale doesn't make you out of shape. I have an endomorphic body type. My body fat percentage is 27%, coming from a doctor who did not base it on a written scale but using actual instruments.

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    • That's a load of shit. Just like your fucking fat ass body.

    • @Gommers Also, no one is trying to look like the man on the right lol

  • It's okay to feel that way, but that isn't the case at all. I felt the same way for a long time. Most of my friends are married and have children. But honestly, I spent that time to work on myself and improving my relationship with the Lord, and that's when He sent the sweetest guy in the world--unexpectedly. I had made up my mind that I didn't want to have a relationship because I wanted to focus on myself and my education instead. I even tried online dating sites, but I had no luck. I mean, I met a few nice guys who I dated for a little while, but it never went anywhere. You could try meeting someone online as there is nothing wrong with that at all. We are all busy and times have changed tremendously. It's pretty normal to meet people online. And if you aren't interested in doing that, just strike up a conversation with a cute guy. You never know where things will go.

    But honestly, you aren't doing anything wrong. You're a mature adult, and it's hard to find others our age who are as mature as we are. Besides, you wouldn't want to be with a guy who cheats on you and doesn't care about you. Consider it a blessing in disguise, and once you meet the guy the Lord has chosen for you, you will be so happy that you waited for him. :) You remind me a lot of myself though. It's not easy feeling lonely. At least we have our dog to keep us company though! :)

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  • I feel the same way and I'll be 30 soon. I have most of the things that I've wanted for myself in life except a relationship. I've never had a relationship either, so I feel like I am a failure.

    I'm sure you're a perfectly nice girl and you just haven't met the right guy yet. Maybe you could try online dating. For me, I tried that but I have anxiety but I've known other people who it has worked out for. You could also join some kind of group in your town or city for something that interests you.

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  • By your responses, it sounds like you want validation for the life choices you have made. ( I am not going to do that, as you seem to be doing enough self congratulating already). Also, if you want to keep your friends, stop judging them!. Marriage and LTR are difficult and are about more then just gifts and compliments!.

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    • I don't need validation and I definitely don't want it from you. And it's not judging, it's things they are actually doing. I know what marriage looks like as my parents have been married for over 30 years and the way my friends treat their boyfriends is not how a 'wife' would treat a husband.

      You sound like the judging one here.

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    • Says the Judge hahaha

    • Also love how you have a boyfriend but your status says trying to forget hahahahaha, nice try attempting to lie. Grow up, will you? Act your age.

  • Do you believe you should be able to own property, have a career outside the home, & vote? Congratulations- you're a feminist.

    But as far as your question goes, it sounds like you're doing a lot of things right. Maybe you should try going to activities hosted at the coffee shops & library. Just start making more friends, and you might find someone worth dating. Best wishes!

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  • Give it some time. You sound like you have your life together... and that is a lot better then some girls. You will meet Mr. Right...

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  • The beach. Great place to meet guys. 8D

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  • I know what you're saying only I'm twice your age almost. It's hard.

    I know this isn't advice just know there are others out there that feel your pain too. Sigh...

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  • I used to be in your situation not long ago.
    I have been told to wait until the chances and the right one come. I didn't really believe it but now I do.

    As you can tell, I'm not good-looking anyway, but still I encountered guys really like who I am. I'm not in a clear situation as my ex came back in the picture, but even girl like me would find love, you can definitely find yours too!

    Just give it some time and don't be afraid if there's a chance waiting for you.

    Good luck :)

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  • nah that's ok we are in the same situation my friends graduate before 3 years from that time and i'm alone in my room playing in my lap top trying to graduate trying to find job with no friends no money just living on with myself sometimes I want to share feeling but no one to share except my sisters

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    • I have a career and it's not a rewarding one. I'm actually going to go back to school and do something else. Being a teacher is not all it's cracked up to be and I'm really over it at this point. I may not have 'no money' like you, but having money doesn't make a difference. At least, it doesn't for me. I'd much rather have strong relationships and I don't.

    • relax everything will happen in the right time

  • Then get yourself a boyfriend. Go to one of your fave places and flirt or make friends at least with some dudes. Hell start an online relationship.

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  • You believe in equality? You're a feminist...

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    • I don't think men and women are equal lol, I never said above that I do

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    • I don't think you understand what feminism is by your responses. That's completely fine, but the civil rights movement was amended post-feminism. Just thought we should clear that up.

    • Well, first, post would be after and people are still fighting for women's rights, so there's no such thing as post-feminism yet. And I do understand what feminism is, but it sounds like you think that's the reason I have certain rights and it's not. You sound like you didn't pass a history class. That's fine, but stop trying to educate people when you don't know what you're talking about.

      Conversation over. Have a nice life.

  • I feel the exact same way, but im 21

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  • Don't worry dear. You're waiting for the right one. When you'll find him you'll be convinced that this is the guy for whom you were waiting for.

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  • You're not doing anything wrong. Just never go looking for a guy. He'll find you.

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    • Really? Life rewards those who are the GPS of their own life, not those who sit and wait for manners to fall from heaven.

  • Sounds like you are doing fairly well. I am content with that life, but if it something that you feel you need (a relationship or to date), then keep trying. I know you are going out to places, which is good! But I wouldn't be like your friends. Complaining about their partner isn't good, sounds like a very unhappy life.

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  • Wow, i am noticing that so many women are in your position.

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  • isn't it odd how "terrible" girls have a boyfriend or husband while us "good" girls dont? I think people are blinded by beauty and attraction. I have often felt like a failure whenever I was single so I know how you feel. I see happy couples in stores and often think "well where is my happiness?" I think thats just normal. Don't worry though you will find someone who is a decent guy and appreciates you for you. just keep trying and sometimes when you aren't even looking someone pops into your life.

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