30 year old guy and an 18 year old girl? Weird?

  • Not weird
    28% (10)43% (23)37% (33)Vote
  • Fucking weird
    72% (26)57% (31)63% (57)Vote
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Most Helpful Guy

  • I personally don't think that age matter has to matter. It can though. It really depends on the two people. He may be a really great guy that you're attracted to and get along with well. If that's true, I don't see how dating him would be weird then. If you are worried what society may think, there's a good chance they wouldn't know both of your ages unless you told them. You can of course date a guy the same age as you, 5 years older or younger and you may or may not be a good match either. But again, if he's "really great guy that you're attracted to and get along with well" I don't think the age difference has to matter.

    Some may proclaim stereotypes like he only wants you for you looks or because he can control you or whatever other negative stereotype. If he doesn't control you or treat you bad or whatever else, it clearly doesn't apply though. Also, to suggest a person wants another person partially for their looks seems obvious to me so I don't really understand that logic.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If the 18-year-old wants a serious relationship that's headed toward marriage? Not weird at all.

    I know hundreds and hundreds of married couples, mb even a thousand. In the VAST majority of the best-functioning couples -- where "best-functioning" includes sexuality, logistics, emotional compatibility, finances, and just big life decisions in general -- the husband is 5 to 12 years older than the wife.
    Like, at least 97 percent of the best-functioning couples.

    There's also more than just my anecdotal experience to back this up:
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/7873718/

    (If you see the more recent studies that purport to show that same-age marriages are most stable, a further look shows that those are BS... because they removed the variable of *which spouse is older*! So, in other words, those studies are lumping marriages in which the wife is 7 years YOUNGER in along with marriages in which the wife is 7 years OLDER. Lol... Nice experimental design, guys.)

    In any case, there are 2 easy reasons to explain this.

    1)
    BIOLOGICAL CLOCKS:
    Our fertility starts declining in our mid-20's, and, if we haven't given birth yet, starts to fall off a cliff around age 30. (Giving birth extends the fertility clock, so to speak.)

    If the guy is older, then it's much more likely that he'll be ready -- psychologically, financially, and leadership-wise -- for parenthood at around the same time as his wife is still fertile.

    2)
    MALE LEADERSHIP / PROTECTIVE VIBE:

    Let's face it, that ^^ is what JUST ABOUT EVERY woman wants in a husband. It takes different forms from woman to woman... but... yeah.

    Can a younger man -- or even a man of the same age -- exert credible leadership? Can he be the legitimate head of the household, in the spiritual sense (not necessarily money, which is mostly not relevant here)?
    There some guys who can step up to that, but, others can't.
    And, on the other side, only some women are ready to accept the headship/leadership -- or even partnership -- of a guy who's younger than them.

    With an older guy, on the other hand, that vibe runs strong indeed.

    Those are the big 2 reasons.

    And a 12-year gap is not SO big that you'll have to slow yr stride because he gets old while you're still young, either.

    __

    For women who also think a man should be a financial provider (and for *men* who think that, hah -- I'm always surprised to learn there are just as many men with this opinion as women)... that's another reason. And a BIG one, too.

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What Guys Said 24

  • Lucky guy more like and anyone that says not is lying. If a fit 18 year old chatted them up they'd feel like a kid at Christmas haha

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    • Not necessarily. I got hit on a few times by girls that age but they have nothing to say of interest... once you get beyond the physical attraction there isn't much else.

    • @mghowmasculinist not at 100 years old haha

  • Yeah its a little weird. I mean its not wrong but your at two completely different stages in life so if he is with you that implies that he might not be mature enough or maybe he is but it won't seem that way. If thats what you two want go for it but it is weird.

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  • Why would it be weird? No is not weird ay all

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  • Its not weird. But sometimes people in that age try to take advantage of younger and naive people. But otherwise its cool.

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  • you can't help who you fall in love with.

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  • Nope. Not all that uncommon. I've met girls that age who are more mature than most 30 year old men.

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  • As long as it's legal and your both happy I see no issues

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  • It is a little weird, since the 30 year old has lived a bit (as an adult) compared to the 18 year old. The 30 year old has a bit more life experience and if they have an 18 year old, that could slow the 30 year old down in general. I'm not saying it couldn't work but those two would really have to work at it so that they are successful together and happy.

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    • I'm kind of curious. Do you think it would be weird if a 40 year old guy that lived a full life with many experiences (lets say he got a phd while being stationed in 15 countries in the military and developed some new technology that he developed in a business, etc.). Would it be weird if he dated a 40 year old girl that world worked her whole life in an office and didn't do much else? Maybe her parents have money so she never even worked to make the situation more extreme. Is that weird if they date?

    • @cavmanier 👍👍👍👍👍👍

  • what's wrong with that as long as both of you are happy

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  • İf its legal in your country and if your 2 are happy , I say go for it :)

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  • Well if it's not arranged marriage, nor is the lady a gold digger, then perhaps there really is no age in love?
    Yeah, kinda bit weird from my view. In the future, I'd go within a range of 5 years older and younger than myself, no more.

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  • It's gonna be weird as fuck in like 99.99% of the cases.

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  • Yup fuckin weird.

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  • Nothing wrong with that.

    I had sex with 15yo when I was 25. We both enjoyed it <3

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    • I appreciate the sentiment but that's a little bit illegal...

    • Laws aren't perfect.

  • both involved have some issues, more so the guy.

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    • Why would it imply they have "issues"?

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    • Not true. A lot of 18 year old girls are attracted to 30 year old men. My older sister worked in a group home for girls 14-17 and she complained about how some of them were going for dirtbag men in their 30's.

    • @zagor did you say a "group home" lol. Why do you think is?

  • its very weird

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  • Lol I don't think it's my place to choose

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  • Weird as fuck but whatever not my business.

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  • No, it's not weird at all.

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    • I mean, 18 is a legal age, and 30 is not too old.

  • A bit unusual but nothing wrong with it

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  • Somewhere between.

    If it's just casual it's not that weird.

    If it's serious, I'd say it depends on the two often and probably on her life experience.

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  • Not weird at all. I married my wife aged 29 and she was younger than 18. These are the ages men and women should get together at. At 16-22 a woman is at her best for marriage and child bearing, while a man comes into his prime at 29+ and has the right temperament, maturity and financially stable to settle down and have kids.

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  • that's hot ;)

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  • its legal, so its fine

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What Girls Said 10

  • I will recommend you to go ahead, but with care.

    Don't get too hung up on age, or anything else. Compatibility is far more important. However, he does, as he the older partner, has extra responsibilities. He has the experience to see issues coming that you can't yet.

    He is at different stages of your lives, and your goals may diverge from his over the next few years. He needs to go into this aware that he is probably not your eventual partner.

    It's up to him to be sure that if it ends, you leave this relationship better off than you entered-healthy, confident of your decisions, not nursing wounds. He has to make sure you develop more options because you knew him, not fewer.

    Wishing you the best of luck.

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    • Thank you for that, really appreciate it!

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    • How would he, if the relationship ended, make sure she left better off? Do you mean to have a peaceful breakup? How would he make sure she develops more options? I'm not sure what you meant by options either.

      I agree when you said"Compatibility is far more important" personally.

    • I mean to have a peaceful break up

  • If you have to ask it's weird.

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  • Vote A. It was "normal" in my life.

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  • yeah i find that disturbing.

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  • no Its not weird. Who cares.

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  • I would frown upon that, to be honest.

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    • Okay, why?

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    • A lot of people the same age don't seem to have much in common but manage to stay together, so that isn't much of an argument.

    • @zagor Yeah... because they're of similar ages. They share similar maturity levels and life experience to be able to work things out. A teenager and a guy pushing 30? Not as much of a chance.

  • Weird

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  • Kinda yeah

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  • To me it is lol

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  • Extremely.

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