Am I being selfish?

A guy that I really like asked me out, and I said no. I've been diagnosed with cancer, and I don't want him to go through this with me. I feel terrible, it broke my heart to refuse, but I like him too much to see him suffer. He knows that I'm sick, so was I right to say no or was I selfish? Should i have given him a chance? Thank you.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think you are. If anything, you're shorting yourself. I don't know what kind of cancer you have, or what your chance of survival is, but let's just assume you might be dead in 5 years. You're passing up the chance to have a great five years, just to spare him the pain of seeing you go through this and losing you.

    You won't hear me say this to a woman almost ever, but that's a rather selfLESS thing to do.

    My opinion: talk to him, tell him everything, and see what he says. You never know. And if you've got a chance for some great memories before you move on to whatever you believe in, shouldn't you take that chance?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • you have to do what is right for you. if he wishes to help and support you that could be a good thing for you but just explain to him why you don't want a relationship and look after yourself. if he cares for you he will respect how you feel and just be there for you if you need it

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What Guys Said 2

  • no it's not selfish.

    sorry about your diagnosis

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  • You did the right thing.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think you should have been honest with him and given him the real reason why you said no. It's not up to you to decide whether or not you're worth his time. If he wants to be with you, let him make that decision. I'm sorry you're going through this, best wishes to you and I hope you beat it.

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  • Maybe you should give him a chance. It might be good for you too.

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