Relationship advice. Should I wait or try my best to move on?

I want to be as honest as possible. At the moment I don't think we can be together because I'm unsure of my feelings for you with that said its not fair to keep stringing you along and seeing you this way. I heard about what happened yesterday and I feel convinced that I'm doing the right thing. This is an unhealthy relationship and it's not something I want for you. That day at Starbucks I didn't chase after you because I knew that if I saw you crying I would change my mind. Just like Thanksgiving. I just need time to myself to discover how I feel.
This is what he said to me. What should I do? Do I take this as hope or no? we've been together for almost 6yrs


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Move on, the relationship has run it's course and your boyfriend wants out. Not because you're a bad person, not because you did anything wrong, not because he doesn't care about you, but because you're 21 and have been with him for 6 years. That's almost 1/3 of your life, that's a long time.
    So much changes in your late teens and early 20's, you're both discovering who you are and trying to figure out your place in the adult world.
    Chances are (from the sound of it) this guy has been realizing that even though you had a great relationship and he probably cares a lot about you, he's no longer the same person he was before and his needs, interests, likes, and dislikes have changed.
    I imagine you are probably changing too...
    It's hard breaking up a relationship that's lasted so long, especially when there wasn't some sort of explosive event that caused a complete change of feeling between the two of you. It would probably be easier if one of you had been cheating and the other discovered it and there was anger and disgust between you. That would be an easy relationship to end.
    It's much more difficult when you realize that you're looking off in one direction and your partner is heading in a different direction. A slow evolution has created some distance, and he's probably realized some time ago that you're not the girl for him and he's not the guy for you. There's a better match out there, for both of you.

    Move on and let him go. Part on good terms and treasure the memories you both have of all the good times and all of the lessons learned from your relationship.
    Don't take it as rejection or that you did anything wrong. Just like you graduated from high school, you're graduating from this relationship. It wouldn't make sense to keep repeating 12th grade over and over again...
    Let him go, don't get any fantasies in your head about him coming back... he probably won't.
    And if a few years go by and you've both dated around, discovered your place in the world, and you end up getting back together, that's great... but don't count on it, it could happen but it's unlikely.

    Good luck!

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What Guys Said 1

  • Only take it as hope if you were hoping he would break up with you.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Hope? He's breaking up with you. Most women don't even get a hint from a crush that direct. Move on.

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