How do you cope with the fact that your boyfriend is WAY out of your league?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year, and he is perfect. He is everything I find attractive wrapped up into one perfect male specimen. He is 6'2", dark thick brown hair, glacier blue eyes, freckles, tattooed, both a mans man and a ladies man, perfect body. I'm 5'2", pale: almost transparent, short blonde hair, dull grey eyes, I lack curves, geeky, by no means have a flat stomach. Every time we go out I see women look at him, one woman actually stole him from me one night on the dance floor by grabbing his butt and forcibly turning him around to face her. Another, on that same night ran her hand up his shirt. He always avoids their advances, and I don't think he would cheat on me. I have always been confident, but being with him has made me realize I may not be as pretty as I thought. My question is, how do I take this all in stride? How do I brush off these advances, and stop letting it impact my self-esteem? I've attached pictures of both my boyfriend and I. How do you cope with the fact that your boyfriend is WAY out of your league?



Updates:
Okay so I think a lot of people have not gotten the whole idea of what I meant. It's not just about looks. He is far smarter, more talented, funnier, more active, and more together than I could ever be. He can pick up any book and memorize it in one read, he learns songs and plays them from one listen, he sounds like Johnny friggin' cash when he sings. He is just a mind blowing person and I'm over here like meh I'm literate.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If he is perfect in every way, he must know himself very well. That means that he must know what he is looking for in a woman, his eyesight is pretty damned good, and he recognized all of that in you when he saw you.

    You're right, there are other women who are hotter than you - physically - to other guys. There always will be. And he probably thinks that there are other guys who are more attractive than him. But to you, he is the hottest thing in town. And to him, you are the complete package.

    If he is that great, he knows that he is attractive to other women, he doesn't need to settle for the first girl who wants to give him a kiss, and he isn't a Shallow Hal. Give him some credit.

    By the way, physical attractiveness is very subjective. Not every guy wants the same thing. Some guys actually prefer girls with small boobs but every girl thinks that 36D is an ideal bust size. Not every guy wants a blonde haired, blue eyed cheerleader type. You are a very cute girl and you have a look that reminds me of a young Sandy Duncan (actress from 1960's and 1970's) or a young Cathy Rigby (Olympic gymnast from the 1960's).

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    • Thank you!
      I'm not sure about his tastes in girls. I'm actually the first girl he has dated that wasn't a tall, leggy, brunette, model type.

Most Helpful Girl

  • This is coming from a woman who's been with men that have LITERALLY asked me and said, "Why are you with me? You're too good looking to be with someone like me."

    BECAUSE of your personality. SOMETHING about you makes him love you.

    If you're sweet, caring, thoughtful, etc. He recognizes that and appreciates you.

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    STAY confident. WHY? Because out of ALL of the other women he COULD have, that man loves YOU and wants YOU. Show him he made the right choice <3

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What Guys Said 14

  • First, consider the following - if he's really that perfect he will have no problem finding an attractive woman. But in stead of running around with supermodels he's with you. That means that of all the opportunities and other women out there, he has determined you offer the best possible combination of features compared to everyone else he has met. Meaning in his eyes you're far superior to all the other women you think are more than you.

    Second, the way men and women evaluate women are very different. Just because you don't believe you fit the standard of hot and attractive woman doesn't mean he should. And I have to agree with him - you're quite attractive. ;)

    Third - there is no such thing as "league". Get it out of your head. You either want to be with someone or you don't. If you start thinking in terms of league you're not talking about actual feelings but about one's ego. There's nothing wrong with being proud with and impressed by your other half. Enjoy it as much as you can. You never know how long you have.

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  • He's with you for a reason. I bet he thinks the same of you, that you're perfect and out of his league.

    If he had girls throwing themselves at him, and he could have any girl, don't you think you must have something special that makes him stay? He chose YOU over all those other girls. You must be pretty damn awesome to him.

    Stop worrying, cause that's just gonna bring problems.

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  • Way out of your league? Wtf You're beautiful wait wait wait let's flip this. How did he get someone beautiful like you, damn son. If he doesn't keep you, you want to chill? lmao Maybe he's out of your league. Lmao, but seriously don't say negative things about yourself, he choose you for a reason. Of course, women are going to be looking at him hell I'm not surprised if guys are looking at you. The point is you both choose each other out of a numerous amount of people where you live or so. So, no one is out of anyone's league.

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  • Just consider yourself lucky and keep doing what you do which was probably why he wanted (and still wants) to be with you in the first place. As for the other women, nothing wrong with letting em have a taste..
    What, they get a couple scoops and gotta go, but its your damn ice cream machine and you can get scoops whenever.

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  • "Dull grey eyes". Thats a first. You two look compatible.

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  • Not sure if fishing for compliments? I refuse to believe anyone in a relationship would start thinking this.

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    • I don't fish. It's a genuine concern. Ever date someone you thought was too good for you? It's not just looks its everything. He is far smarter, more active, more talented. It's just ridiculous.

    • Yeah, i always date people who i think are too attractive for me, that's why i'm attracted to them. Never thought of someone as far better in every other aspect of life though, my girlfriend is better at some things than me and worse in others.

      Put it this way, he's with you for a reason that's all that matters.

  • Tbh I think you're equal

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  • He's dreamy but you're cute too, plus it's cool to have someone everyone wants

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    • Oh I know he is dreamy lol, you don't have to tell me that twice.

  • Don't "deal" with it. Enjoy it.

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    • It's not enjoyable. I don't want every girl and their mother screwing my man with their eyes. I'm just thankful they just know his looks and not his personality. Because if they did then I'd really have to put up with so much crap.

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    • I wouldn't mind it if it wasn't all the time. From Wendy's to Walgreen's it doesn't matter. Lol if guys looked at me as much as girls looked at him it would make me uncomfortable.

    • First World Problem! LOL

  • Penis size?

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  • you look a lot younger than him..

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    • I'm 23, he is 27. He is three years and five days older than me.

    • Ok but I mean you look like you're in your late teens. he looks his age tho

    • I know. I look like I'm 15 lol. A girl point that out early, she said maybe these girls hit on him because they think I'm his little sister or something.

  • You're pretty cute. I can tell, which is unusual, that he's a pretty good looking guy, so if he has good traits, i'm sure he has his pick of women.

    He is choosing you.

    Like I said, you're cute. Could he find someone slightly better looking? To be very blunt, maybe yes. But they wouldn't be -that- much better looking, because you ARE attractive. So if you have a lot of other qualities he loves, and you are attractive, I can understand why he'd choose that over some random girl who happens to be -slightly- better looking.

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  • u are both equal looks wise

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What Girls Said 13

  • y'all look good together. He's with you for a reason. Stop nit picking about what you hate about yourself and how you're not good enough for him. He's with YOU He sees SOMETHING attractive about you. That's all you need.

    wish y'all luck. And you're gorgeous. boyfriend is lucky

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  • well the fact that you see him as so perfect is definitely a good thing for your relationship. but the fact that you see yourself so negatively is not! for one thing, you are adorable. i don't know much about your talents or your personality but i'm sure you're as incredible as he is, especially in his eyes. just talk to him about it.

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    • I have. He tells me he only have eyes for me and he thinks I'm perfect. But at the same time when I compliment him he disagrees with me, and when others do it goes to his head. Most recent thing is he just came home from drill (2 weeks gone down in Indiana) he came home and I noticed his arms and chest had gotten bigger. I told him and he said "nope, I'm tiny" one of his friends told him the same thing and it went to his head and I caught him flexing them in the mirror later that night, lol.

    • haha well maybe he is aware of the way you see him. sometimes if you know how someone views you, you don't necessarily agree with what they say. I don't know if that makes sense lol

  • Egh, just quit being insecure. He wouldn't be with you if he didn't think you meet his standards. As for advances made by other girls, just tell him to actually let them know he's taken. He should walk away from situations like that, not allow them. Nobody should be able to "steal" him from you for the night.

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    • She didn't steal him for the night. He does avoid all advances and he does tell people he is taken. It's just crampy that it happens all the time.

    • Well, she did steal him apparently, according to you. That shouldn't even be possible.

    • Just by turning him around for a dance. And it is possible, he isn't rude, she was older, he found it funny and he doesn't think I'm jealous. Which typically I'm not, but being with him has made me jealous. I know he wouldn't sleep with any one else, but it's the fact that they try. I mean I wouldn't dare touch another women's partner.

  • You are very pretty! I think you're both about equal looks wise

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    • Don't be insecure because he's with you for a reason. Insecurity and jealousy are the main killers in relationships.

      You are beautiful and he sees that and other things in you.

      He had girls throwing themselves at him, and he obviously didn't want them. That's the type of man you want in your life. Appreciate that but remember that he sees you over them and he appreciates you too.

  • You sound like a great girlfriend and also, you look so pretty! He'd be lucky to have you. Never undermine yourself.

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    • Thank you. This was actually a huge boost. Thank you for not saying anything about my confidence or how I should enjoy women looking at him.

  • I think you guys are equal looks wise. dont worry about it!

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  • You need to realize that he chose you, not those other women. You are really cute and he is handsome. I don't think either of you guys are out of each others leagues (I don't believe in leagues anyway lol). You guys make a cute couple😄

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    • Thank you. That means a great deal. I mean lol I used a good picture on a day that I decided to actually put effort into my looks. On a normal day I don't do much of anything.

  • only thing he has that u clearly don't have is self confidence

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    • I actually have plenty of confidence. Lol it's funny actually because before I started dating him I was very confident. I actually walked up to him and asked him for his number when we first met. After about a week of him bugging me for a date I accepted. I am a very confident girl. It's just the fact that these girls see him with me and don't bat an eyelash. They don't care, they don't think "oh she is pretty I bet their together" they think "oh he is hot I'm going to hit on him"

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    • ohh lol, u can paste it with a space before the '. com' i rlly wanna see those pics XD

    • Well i mean you can add me on facebook. I have every "dolled up" pic on there.

  • You don't stop being down on yourself take what's yours and own it. Some wiman touched my man's butt shed be on hers

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  • He is a catch from what you have described. You should enjoy it, I bet he sees good virtues from you as well. and I think you are pretty cute.

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  • I'm really jealous and he deal with it

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  • You're super pretty though, especially if you changed your style a bit.

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    • To be honest my style varies. I know how to pretty myself up, but I choose not to because I don't want to be seen as an object.

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    • No of course not you are absolutely entitled to dress and look as you wish. I was merely suggesting that you are a potential conventional beauty, you just don't present yourself as one - which is not necessarily a bad thing of course.

    • I really wish I could show you more pictures. Lol before I started seeing my boyfriend I dressed totally different. I was very much an old fashioned type girl, I liked dresses and heels, pin up make-up and cute up-dos. But that all changed when I went to college. It was too much time I didn't have, and then I met my boyfriend and he liked me in the frumpy cloths, with out the make up, and they are comfy. Lol so I figured "why not" and just didn't attempt to doll myself up like that anymore. I don't think he has ever seen me with make up on. Lol

  • He's with you for a reason

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    • That's what he always says. He tells me he loves me more than anything, and I believe him. But I don't know how to deal with all these women making passes at him. It literally happens all the time. Whether we are in the store or even driving. Some girl made a comment to him while we were driving home from the beach. It was so hard not to tell her to keep her eyes on the road.

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