So today While I was doing some chores my boyfriend texts me "hey baby" and so we talked for 7 minutes. I was done with chores so I had nothing else to do so when he asked me if I was doing anything I said "nope, which means I have time to talk :)" (since we barely talk). And then he said "I wish I was with you" which to me was like that amazing feeling you get inside of you but then he said "but since I'm not I'm gonna go play video games" and then he left, which left me with that empty feeling in my heart and I just literally started bursting into tears. I really love him but I don't know what to do. I'm about to leave on vacation in 1 day and I won't be able to talk to him for 10 days since I'll be with my family the whole time so I'm thinking maybe that and literally saying that him playing so much and only talking to me 7 minutes a day is a problem and that I'm upset about it. But I don't know if I should do it. What should I do? We've been together for 3 months now. I'm 17 and he's 18 by the way. Thanks
Most Helpful Guy
You need to accept the reality that LDRs don't work. Ironically, you even mentioned 3 months - as I've said in many previous posts, 90 days seems to be as long as most people can maintain the energy and effort needed to maintain a LDR before they start to lose interest.
Very simply, the effort vs. reward ratio is skewed heavily towards EFFORT with very, very little REWARD, and that just isn't sustainable for most people - in fact, only those who are SUPER committed and willing to put in great effort and make great sacrifices over a LONG period of time can make it happen, which usually means the success rate is barely 2-3%.
You tried, but it shouldn't be a surprise to learn that you are in the 97-98% whose relationships couldn't survive the separation, and not in the 2-3% who could.
Learn from this painful lesson and in the future, break up if things go LD. You can agree that if you move close to each other in the future, and are both single, that you'll date again THEN, but go ahead and break up and live your life like you never expect to see them again (don't stay single just on the empty hope that something might change - it's a waste). Chances are you WON'T ever get together again, but it's okay to leave the possibility open, as long as you don't put your love life on hold.
You should also write in your journal 1000 times: Long Distance Relationships DON'T WORK!0
Most Helpful Girl
You dump him. Clearly he's not emotionally mature, nor does he have what it takes to be in a long distance relationship if he thinks playing video games is more important than spending some time communicating with his girlfriend. When communication IS all you have in a long distance relationship. He's neglecting the ONE thing he can do with you. That says a lot about where his mind and heart is at. Sorry.3