Is this enough to break up with him?

I've been dating this guy for over a year. He's nice, caring, and down to earth and I'm usually happy with him. But I'm worried about his friend. He has a roommate who is absolutely crazy. He has no social skills and acts like a child. He also keeps trying to talk to me and stares at me constantly when I'm at their place. I'm pretty sure the roommate has some kind of mental issue. I've talked to my boyfriend about this but he always brushes it off and says the roommate is just being himself. He even tells me that this guy is his best friend. I don't understand why he would want to spend so much time with someone like this, and why he doesn't just flat out tell me his roommate is crazy instead of acting like he's a normal person. I feel like my boyfriend doesn't understand where I'm coming from and is being really stupid.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes absolutely, but first you should give him an ultimatum, that he has to choose his best friend or you. If he chooses you, then you should stay with him, because he's clearly devoted to you if he ditches his best friend to make you happy. If he refuses or tries to convince you that his friend is normal then it's clear he doesn't deserve you, and you should find someone who would drop the whole world for you if you asked. Someone that wouldn't force you to be around people you didn't like, and would let you choose the friends he gets to keep, or have him make new friends with people that you like. I think your boyfriend will understand though if you just explain to him that if he doesn't stop being friends and hanging out with that dude you can't handle it anymore. Tell him he doesn't need to understand why or agree with you, but if he wants to stay together it's got to be your way. If you let him get away with stuff like this now it'll just pile on more and more, and he'll think that even when you express your dislike for a situation that you will participate anyway, let him know that's not the case. Tell him you need someone who's going to be there for you 100% of the time right or wrong. You feel like he's choosing that mental case over you every time, and it makes you feel unwanted and unimportant, and I assure you there are plenty of dudes willing to take his place, and act right.

    • Well I wouldn't go so far to say I get to choose who he hangs out with, because I wouldn't want him to do that to me. I just think there might be something wrong with him too if he wants to be friends with a crazy person, and if he's being so defensive about it. It scares me and when I think about the future this is a reason that makes me want to run.

    • Of course you wouldn't need to pick everyone he hangs out with, but if you really think someone is crazy, or detrimental to your life with him, and you talk to him about it and he tells you the dude is normal, then maybe then you get to question his judgement on friends when you can tell there is something wrong and he can't. I don't think you'll have to worry about a break up, you seem like a nice young lady, and I'm sure he'll understand where you're coming from, but if not, you gotta do what's best for you. Good luck chick hope you get exactly what you want.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I don't wanna listen to your BS fabrications but please leave him asap... please FOR THE LOVE OF GOD leave him... poor guy stuck with a psycho evil whore like you

  • It's manifest and transparent you suffer from some mental issueS.

    Good luck.


What Girls Said 1

  • Well it is his friend not yours? It isn't your place to make a judgement on him being crazy. If your boyfriend likes him that has nothing to so with you. It would be low to break up with your boyfriend over this.

    Why not ask to spend time away from the roommate or spend time at yours so he doesn't scare you so much/

    • There's clearly something off about him. I've tried to look past it for a while but you can't. It's not that I don't have sympathy for people like that but I don't want to be around him.

    • Well don't be and tell your boyfriend that. Hang out outside his room, you can't ask him to leave. But it shouldn't effect your relationship.