Is it necessary for a guy with bad dating luck to pay for professional advice?

That is, if he really wants to have a satisfying dating life? If he's tired of women completely ignoring him or brushing him off?

Tell me why or why not and explain.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sonic, you know me and how much I've researched the area your talking about. I can officially tell you that you can get the same information online- as long as you pay attention. People constantly think that these "dating gurus" are your ticket to success with women.. But what I'm gonna tell you, is about to blow your doors off.

    Sometimes we're not aware of our problems. When I first began dating, I was the worst with that. But overtime I started to pinpoint problems in myself and became "self-aware"... That was a big key to my own image. If I didn't know what I was doing, how could I remedy it for round 2?... Next, I had to learn effectively what did and didn't work with women. Here's a list that I've made for the average man:

    1) Trying to be someone your not- DONT DO IT.

    - If you're self conscious that you can't flirt with women, so you try to be flirtatious... Let's just say you look like a creepy dork that doesn't understand women.

    2) Having ulterior motives are bad, having goals are good.

    - If you want to sleep with a girl, you're not out of line. But if you are talking with her only for the fact of sleeping with her, you're gonna waste your time alot. Women give more respect to a man that can be unashamed of his life. You're a man, live by that fact.

    3) Drama and pessimistic information... Is annoying

    - If you go around talking about how you don't get dates, how your frustrated that the bank is closed on a holiday, that you can't get over your ex; and then you ask for her number... You will fail horribly. She will make up an excuse or otherwise "dismiss you". You're sending off vibes that show insecurities with how to handle the situation. Instead, talk about something else to get your mind off all of those bad things, hell.. invite her to coffee if you want to, that's a good start.

    4) ESCALATION - Try it.

    - Women naturally assume that men look for women. It's nature and it's perfectly fine. The biggest problem is that men "freeze" when they are uncomfortable, rather than pushing for the next step. Read this blog about that ( link )... Women respond excellently with escalation. Treat it like a relationship, even when it's not. If she has a problem, she will speak up; if she doesn't have a problem, it will leave you that much closer to her and her to you.

    5) Being needy / permission seeking

    - HUGE pet peeve. Rather than saying "Where do you want to eat".. Send her a message through what you're saying that screams confidence-> "I'm getting breakfast and I'd like you to join. I'll be at dennys around 8am"... You're not asking anything, you're inviting. If she says no, continue with your plans.

    And the biggest one:

    6) DON"T BE A JERK

    - Women respond amazing to people they can "help", but do you want help or do you want a relationship?.. Fix your problems ahead of time and keep the insecurities out of the dating arena. She doesn't need your problems and you don't need hers.

    ~ ArtistBBoy

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    • And one last thing.. I will admit that the books I've read from dating gurus are actually rather fascinating. They entertain my mind and help me become more self-aware of any issues that I may not have addressed already.

    • Thanks, Art. Sometimes in my frustration I'm curious to know what other knowledge could possibly be out there...hence a question like this, where I wanted to see what kind of opinions people have on professional dating "coaches", books, etc.--whether it holds any merit for the totally clueless, which I feel like sometimes. At least I unleash my frustration here and not with women ; ) But your answer is very refreshing.

    • Sonic, it's my pleasure man. Learning is highly respectable and it holds more value than actual material possession. I think it's worth a shot if your interest has been piqued. My most favorite reads are David Deangelo's basic set, Robbys Ignore and Score set, and the book "Mind Lines" by Michael Hall... They will keep your mind confused for a long time, but help one improve their self-awareness a LOT.

What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 1

  • Well you get advice from guys who have gone out their and tried everything imaginalbe, dated and successfully got the girls, so you get some insights and tips but its just a game. You can get lots of free info online just google it. Its basic psychology, how people behave and react, avoid certain thing, say certian things,...

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