my boyfriend and I are both 21. I have a job and I drive everywhere. he doesn't have a job nor a car. So I tend to feel obligated to pay for the both of us since I have money. I always initiate paying for the both of us every now and then. He hardly steps up and pays for the me but he will pay for himself most of the time so I won't have to pay. I wish he would step up and pay a little more often like how it should be. I told him he needs to get a job and although I hate telling him that, I think it's a little unfair for me.
Most Helpful Girl
There's no "should", it's just whatever works for you and your partner. I think it's good to be willing to pay your own share.
However, my boyfriend makes significantly more than I do. He's pretty well off. So, though I've offered to take turns or split it and don't have an issue with that, he told me from the start not to worry about it. And I feel silly insisting when it's clearly not a big deal to him. He's said he'd just rather focus on us having a good time than who pays for what, and I respect that. It works for us I guess, and I appreciate it whenever he takes me out.
On your situation, I understand your frustration. You should talk to him. You're not comfortable doing most of the paying, and it's important that he get a job not just because of that, but also to have his own independence.1