Why don't most guys ever make the first move around me?

I have noticed that I always have to make the first move when I am interested in a guy and a lot of guys that I am interested never makes the first move to ask me out when they seem to like me. Why is that? Is it ok for me to make the first move or should the guy make the first move? How can I let the guy know that I'm interested in him and want to date him without being too pushy?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's better to be your own person than changing your ways only to be conventional. It's okay to make the first move if you truly like that person. You aren't pushy if you ask him out, in fact, any guy would find that flattering!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If it's you that has the crush, then you should probably make the first move rather than waiting on your crushes to do that for you. If you don't really know these guys that well. Take the time to talk to them and get to know them better, before you go diving in and asking them out. No point in doing that if they are already in relationships. Its the other way around for me, some guys like me but never seem to be able to act on it.

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What Guys Said 23

  • There's nothing wrong with you making the first move and good for you for doing it. Guys honestly are getting sick of being rejected and/or played so a lot of us just simply aren't bothering to ask anymore, regardless how much we may like you. We guys for the most part are always expected to make the first move with a lot of women and take the rejection and all the feelings that go with it. We have all the same thoughts/feelings as you women, but we're expected to suck it up?

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  • Look girls play a lot of games and a lot of them dont evne let you know they like you how do you expect a guy to approach you if he doesn't know? iam not gonna do it simply put.

    Not to mention i have countless women showing interest in me and giving me their numbers or fb or whatever and then they start drifting away, and when i get bored and move on they start getting excited about talking to me and being around me again, needless to say it doesn't work iam sorry but i have way too much dignity to waste it like that on such girls.

    also maybe he doesn't find you hot i dont find some girls hot even though i know they like me and want to date me, physical attraction is important for me as much as personality, and your crush is probably hot which means he got options so you gotta stand out somehow.

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  • Depends on the setting normally. Guys are more likely to ask you out in a pub then someone you know fairly well and talk to everyday.

    Telling them is the best way to let them know. Most people, male or female, will either miss the hints or convince themselves they are making it up because they want to see it.

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  • It sounds like they're not interested. When a guy likes you he'll make it known.

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    • Very true, but some struggle to act on it verbally. So you don't have much choice other than to watch their body language.

    • @Shorty1991
      If they don't have the skills to verbally say it then their body will definitely tell you that he's interested. If he's skilled enough to be aware of his body language then he should be skilled in talking to a girl too

    • That's exactly what I thought. If a guy is confident enough to show that he likes you through body language, then surely he will be capable of talking to you. . . but with the guys I seem to attract, they never seem to act on it.

  • Because quite some men are FED UP with that bs. You girls are no babies to get pampered by men. If you want a guy then fckn get up and talk to him. Thanks.

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  • They probably have no idea you would be interested so they just don't try.

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  • im in exactly the same position, i want this girl to make a move. there have been enough signs from her. its one of those situations where if she does make a move i. e adding me on social media, ill take it from there.

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  • Guys are not going to make the first move when you got feminists promoting rape culture, misandry and bad behaviour. Soon the average woman is going to find it difficult to find a partner or even a date especially in her 30s when majority of men are going MGTOW.

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  • I want that D in my P tell them. Or do you wanna put frosting on my cake baby? Like that lol. It's no big deal who asks who honestly. Maybe you are either super hot or super homely looking

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  • its ok for you to make the first move and maybe you just dont look approachable?

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  • Because they don't have to make the first move as in they are not obligated to. This is 2016!

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  • The person who wants a relationship should be the one who makes a move.

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  • You might look too hard to get or too stuck up or just too beautiful so it is intimidating

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  • I can't speak for all guys but I don't make any moves for now. Got too much stuff to worry about my life.

    Fear and uncertainty 🙁

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  • Simple rules. If your interested you make the first move, if they are, they make the first move. It may be crazy talk but just being blunt leaves less room for confusion.

    Possible outcomes.
    He accepts your feelings and you become the best buddies ever.

    he declines as he is real a lizard monster wearing a human suit.

    The world ends and it doesn't matter.

    He isn't interested in you in that way and you both become friends?

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  • How do you go about making the "first move"?

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  • they probaly aren't interested

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  • They may feel intimidated by your good looks. Check mine out www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2060912-why-hasn-t-she-rejected-me-lol

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  • I never do because they are never interested

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  • I remember a girl who I later found out had a crush on me I would have gone out with her as well and she could have been a good match but didn't know she was interested till it was too late and I was going to be moving away plus I was also a shy person when it comes to that sort of thing.

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  • Maybe your type are more the guys that prefer to BE asked out?

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  • then i can make the first move for you, dont worry my girl :P :D :)

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  • Most guys are pussies after this feminism thing has swept the world. Plus we are equal and guys want girls to ask them out. Welcome to the new reality

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    • Because it's a pussy to not want to be talking jester and entertain a girl brah?

What Girls Said 2

  • if everyone thought asking someone out is being potion one would get asked out. you want him to ask you out, so you clearly dont think its pushy in general to ask someone out, only if its you? why is that?

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  • Just flirt & be sweet but not easy!! Be yourself

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