Is my boyfriend controlling or is he right? PLEASE HELP?

My boyfriend and I have many arguments about the way I dress. I used to dress very "tomboyish" like baggy shirts, sweaters stuff like that, and my boyfriend hates it. He wants me to dress preppy and girly and sometimes I like the idea of being girly but other times I wanna feel comfortable. If I wear a baggy shirt when I'm around him or have my hair in a bun he will say that it looks like he's dating a dude. Also he hates it if I wear tank tops when he's not around. The tank tops I wear do not show cleavage at all but he hates it regardless and he thinks that I should respect his wishes. Also we are having an argument currently where I was wearing short shorts and a cutout shirt around my house and their was no one here besides my mom and he got really mad at me because he says I never know if someone could be at my house while I'm there. He stopped talking to me and called me immature and stupid. I don't see it as a problem since I'm in my house but he thinks it's a huge problem and I don't know what to do. I tried to apologize many times but he says he can't forgive me because we've had many arguments about the way I dress before. Is he controlling or is it me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • he's trying to control you, hebshould be happy with what makes you happy! You dont need that and that is very childish ofbhim to act like that! You can do better you do not need nor deserve that!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • He's controlling. No boyfriend gets to police his girlfriend's appearance. I can understand somewhat if a guy is like, "please don't wear that plunging dress" (although I don't entirely agree, I can still understand). But that's not what you're boyfriend is doing. He wants you to dress up for him every time you see him, and not wear anything attractive when he's not around. At times, he sounds paranoid.

    You're not wrong here. He is.

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What Guys Said 2

  • he's very controlling... not really cool

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  • Don't listen to him. Dress like a whore all you want. YOLO

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What Girls Said 7

  • I think he's immature and stupid. I don't see a problem with how you dress either. I wouldn't say he's controlling yet because he hasn't quite used it as leverage to threaten you about anything, but it's definitely a sign for future issues and a tendency to exhibit those characteristics. What the fuck is he so paranoid about? You have ever right to dress how you want and what makes you comfortable. My guy doesn't care, but if I dress nice he appreciates it a lot, but he doesn't make any sort of negative comment if I'm in sweats and a tank, he thinks its cute if anything.

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  • So his trying to control you in the way you dress? So he rather you dress preppy and girly instead of that AND comfortable aswell? Seems rather picky in my opinion. His being unrealistic at the moment. Maybe don't talk to him if his too busy having a tantrum of his own. I don't see it a big of a deal at all

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  • He's super controlling and paranoid. Not a big loss.

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  • He's controlling. If you guys are arguing so much because of the way you dress, sorry to say this but it's time to move on. His loss!

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  • He's controlling

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  • He's being controlling. You can dress anyway you want.

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  • Wtf? He wants you to dress girly then when you do (short shorts and tanks) he ridicules you for that? Girl he is trying to control you. Ever hear of the term; "damned if you do, damned if you dont" that applies here. No one especially your boyfriend can tell you what to wear. It is your body and you should feel comfortable. Tell him to shut it or walk. ain't nobody got time for that!

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