Okay so this sounds kinda pathetic and depressing BUT I've never dated anyone and I don't think I will anytime soon. I'm 17 right now, and I know that dating isn't a life or death type thing or some big shot ideal thing the movies make it out to be so I've just never been focused on dating: I don't see the whole "I need a person to make me happy". However, I asked my older cousin if that made me seem strange and she told me it's no big deal, just as long as I don't wait too long because I'll miss my shot without even knowing I had one. //That// got me thinking: why don't I just go for it and date? The problem is that I realized I'm afraid to date and that's a big reason why I say no to the guys that ask me out is because I'm scared I'll scare them away somehow. Whether it's my crazy family or my problematic self (I admit i am problematic but I don't wanna drop my problems on the poor guy), I'm scared I'll accidentally distance myself from the guy and then what's the point of a relationship? I've been told I have trouble opening up and I don't deny that (I'm super shy and socially awkward). I'm also afraid that I'll annoy the guy before I even get to make a move (I also have anxiety sooo yea I'm a mess). I don't know how to get past all that and say a simple "hello" to an attractive person without looking like a dork or wimping out. I feel like as a teenager I should already know the basics about dating but I don't even know the basics about "peopling" lol.
Most Helpful Guy
It's VERY natural to be scared of dating before you do it. Hell, I still get nervous to date and I'm in my mid 30s! If you scare a guy away, then good! He wasn't right for you. You don't want to keep around a guy that doesn't appreciate you for who you are. The right one will stick around despite your flaws, quirks, silliness, lack of silliness, whatever you think will scare someone away.
I personally find girls that are shy and socially awkward to be adorable. It makes me feel a little more "normal" and I can relate to them because I'm the same way.0
What Experts Said
First of all you are a teenager... and just be honest... Love the line... "I'm super shy and socially awkward and I am a hot mess"... Tell that to the guy.. so refreshing and different. Embrace this believe me... it's attractive. And it relieves pressure off of you. Quirky is the new sexy. Trust me.2