Should I stop being friends with him?

So I know staying friends with an ex is a bad thing, but we were never in a relationship. We dated but non-exclusively, for roughly 6months. Due to circumstances and him meeting someone who he did want a relationship with we went to just being friends. It's been well over a yr and going on two, I am in a relationship but still think of this guy, even when we're not talking (we still stay in touch). I don't think about wanting to be with him but I think about him... sometimes like tonight, I can't sleep because of it. He is still in that relationship and I am so happy for him. I won't lie seeing their pics on social media can sometimes be a little tough but like a 3 on a 1-10 scale; 10 being devistated. This is one time I've moved on and really felt the friendship could remain. And even tho my thoughts are not romantic feel bad for even having them when I'm seeing someone else. My current relationship is rather serious and yet I can find my self think about my old lover for a good portion of my day. I'm just worried staying friends with him is not fair to my current boyfriend.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I disargee with everyone here.. i can understand what its like to still think about a ex even more so when the relationship was a good one.. so your not really doing anything wrong by thinking of him.. thay fades over time. But i think the main question you gotta ask yourself is can you just be friends with your ex and keep it that way? if so try being friends but if u feel any old feelings coming back move on. Also by the way listen to your heart amd don't worry about what everyone else here says o spent 1 year listening to what others here told me to do and i regert it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes. Here's reality knocking: You can never be friends with him again. Because you two have explored sexual, mental, and emotional intimacy with one another, friendship is no longer an option. It’s like adding food coloring to water and expecting it to revert back to it’s original component. It’s not gonna happen. Either of you will miss that sexy thing the other used to do or reminisce on that romantic experience or find yourself smiling when thinking back to some aspect of them. It’s inevitable and quite frankly, it’s downright disrespectful for you to be so cozy with your ex while you’re in a new relationship. Don’t make your current boyfriend have to deal with your past. It’s not cool when your past becomes a new guy’s shitty, problematic, troublesome present. Very disrespectful.


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • It's time to stop being friends then
    and I also feel you shouldn't date yet

  • In all honesty, I think it's a bad idea to remain friends with him. It'd just bring too much drama into your life by complicating your new relationship. It'd be unfair to your present boyfriend , especially considering you still have an emotional attachment to your " ex"

    In time , as your new relationship progresses you'll find you'll think about the other guy less and less.

    Life is meant to be travelled forwards , not backwards so I'd try to focus on the " here & now" instead of clinging to something behind you. Look to the future with this new guy. Of course you'll think about the past, but it shouldn't control this moment in time.