Why do the loyal suffer?

I've been seeing a guy since Feb things have been great I thought I finally met the one. About a month ago he started changing he was blowing me off he started ignoring my calls & text but he would always seem to reply to snapchats but ignore everything else. I've recently tried to end it on at least three different occasions. Well a couple of days ago I found out he had a girlfriend so when I asked him about it he initially ignored me until I asked again. When he called me he admitted that he'd been dating this girl maybe 2 or 3 days. The part that hurts the most is I didn't see it coming & whenever I told him I wanted a relationship he came up with a million different excuses as to why he didn't want one. The crazy part is we go to school together and his now girlfriend goes to school 2 hours away. I never knew guys can be so evil and dirty. I've been wondering will he try to come back to me because we also, have classes together. The whole situation is crazy and I don't think I've been hurt this bad before.


0|0
3|4

Most Helpful Guy

  • not a lot to go on here to comment on.

    I'm not sure why the loyal suffer. I think it is because we give ourselves to one person and the other person isn't committed. Until you get the ring or a solid statement of commitment, it isn't there. Giving too much can end up letting him go. Sounds like it wasn't as perfect as you say if you tried to end it several times. that is the sign of an emotionally messed up relationship. so maybe you were loyal, but there were deep rooted problems.

    good to pause and see what you learned about yourself and him. take the value out of it.

    0|0
    0|0
    • 3mo

      Wellll it was constant girls I found about, about two forsure within a month period but I thought he'd change

    • Show All
    • 3mo

      Yea there was often actually

    • 3mo

      My answer is thus: he wasn't committed, you were. You should not have given him anything. By giving yourself away, you devalue yourself... I say this to females on this site all the time. The girls think they will win the guy with sex, but so often (most often), they lose him by letting him go. Sex is a release. It is a game and you can't just give away the goods to a guy that is not committed, that was unwise. Thinking a person will change is a great lesson... why would he change if he's getting what he wants from multi[ple girls... girls thinking is really screwed up.

      In general, never count on a person to change, they will change if they want to change. You aren't going to change them. A valuable lesson.

      Why some guys win girls like this is amazing, he must be quite the prize. While you were with him, there are some quality committed guys that get no attention from girls. How do you feel about that?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Because they continue to give up part of themselves without the other fighting for it or earning it. Its really sad. But then those same people get upset when you don't put out and sacrifice everything you have for them. Those kind of people are not worth it, and it is best that you as a loyal person to set up boundaries and don't get emotionally attached to every and anybody you date without them showing interest in respecting you and cherishing the love you provide them.

    0|0
    0|0
    • 3mo

      Well when I started ignoring him or tried to let it go he'd be like let me fix it tell me what to fix etccc... If I would've followed my first mind I would probably still be hurt just not as bad

    • 3mo

      @Slim2012 It was best to continue to ignore him and don't have anything to do with him if it was that bad. He needs to learn from this, and he hasn't. He's just desperate to fix whatever it is that he's done. And desperation is a problem. That is not enough to take a person back.

What Guys Said 3

  • Well the question is did this guy ever like you. Yeah he could be a jerk ultimately but did he ever really want to date you and made it very obvious. He could have possibly not been so didn't see a reason to tell you that he found a girl he liked. I don't know just trying to help you out. Thoughts?

    0|0
    0|0
    • 3mo

      I did ask him that & he said he did & he had feelings for me until about a month ago

    • Show All
    • 3mo

      Ok well than that's weird. Either he changed in a month somehow, found a girl he liked more, or my guess is that things were going to slow and couldn't wait anymore.

    • 3mo

      I have been heavily confused myself too. LITERALLY going through a very similar deal with this girl that I KNEW liked me. I guess my advice is to just move on from thinking about dating him cause he is with someone else now and doesn't seem to respect you very much in my opinion. Unless you want to fight back and try to interest him again but that can be awkward and also more devastating

  • YEah when someone starts to get that distant it's time to just move on, people play too many games. Yeah whenever someone gives you an excuse for not wanting a relationship, it's generally more bullshit than anything else in my opinion. BLock him on everything.

    0|0
    0|0
    • 3mo

      I've blocked him but I still have class with him in the upcoming semester

    • 3mo

      Just blatantly ignore him if he tries to talk to you or tell him to fuck off I guess

  • Don't take him back. He might try just for convenience, but once you aren't in school together, he'll be messed up again.
    Women do the same stuff. If you are a good loyal person, just expect to get hurt over and over many times until you find the right one. Many people of both genders experience that.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 2

  • I've been there. It's best to move on to someone that isn't so distant, or take a break and focus on yourself for a bit. It does hurt, but it's not worth stressing and making yourself upset over if they don't seem to really care.

    0|0
    0|0
  • sorry this happened to you. avoid him if it hurts. don't let him come back to you.
    move on.
    don't worry about the past. a lesson

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...