Why hasn't he made any sexual advances towards me?

To start things off I'm not complaining at all, just curios. so I've been talking to this guy for about 2 months. He gives me kisses, holds me and cuddles but nothing sexual. Today I had a tube dress on and I sent him a picture of my new hair cut, it look like I didn't have anything on. He said I looked beautiful and asked if I was naked with a shocked emoji face. I told him I had a dress on and I flirted with him asking "do you want me to be naked." His response was " oh no dear, don't worry dear." Him being not so sexual makes me want to be sexual with him. lol could it be because of his background? He's African and Christian. Has this ever happened to anyone?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He's Christian and male?
    He's sexual. BUT he's got an image to and morality to maintain and he feels that doing something wrong will result in a massive amount of backlash from friends and family If anyone find out (more backlash than in a non religious environment)

    Would he like nudes? Yes. Would he ever ask for them? No.
    I would recommend saying something like "I won't tell anyone ;)" gain his trust. He's afraid of consequenses as all Christians are. It's also possible he just doesn't want to. But make him feel comfortable with either choice.

    -a Christian with tons of Christian friends.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • He is a Christian, and knows how to respect a lady. Especially since he is African and a Christian. Any form of sexual activity before marriage is forbidden. He asked because he was curious at what you sent him. As long as you are okay with this, there shouldn't be a problem. Usually other people will take that as a sign of no further interested and will leave the relationship, making the other person heartbroken. He very much likes you and I'm sure he is sexually attracted you, but that doesn't mean he has to have sex with you. He is saving that special part of him for marriage and very much might see you in that married future if you feel the same way.

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What Guys Said 16

  • If you are seriously interested, in him tread carefully. I think he has a notion of waiting until marriage. If you aren't willing to go that far before finding out if you are sexually compatible, you may have to pick a different guy. It's also possible that he's just not into women.

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  • The reason I generally don't make sexual advances is because I'm constantly afraid of them being unwelcome, he could have a myriad of reasons though, he might not have thought to, he may have an incompatible sexuality, he may not want to, could be anything. If you want things to get sexual it's probably a good idea to make a move on him but take it slow so it doesn't feel forced if he isn't up for it (I say make a move rather than proposition him because he may feel obliged to turn down a sexual offer), hard to say really

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  • He is treating you with great respect. You should feel honored. He could lose respect for you if you get too sexually playful with him.

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  • he is trying to be nice and not overly sexual. his value system may dictate how aggressive he is.

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  • You never know what is going on with the religious ones. Some guys are just nervous to make sexual advances because they aren't sure if you want them or not and are afraid. But he might just be... too religious.
    If I were you I'd make some very subtle advances myself. Rub his leg with your hand while you are kissing. That by itself is pretty innocent. Move in just a little toward his inner thigh and pay close attention to his reaction, and start rubbing his inner thigh really good if he doesn't shy away or seems to enjoy it. Then you can start grazing your hand against his bulge a little - "accidentally" if you need to - and again, pay close attention to his response. If for example he thrusts his pelvis out toward your hand, or widens his legs more... he probably wants you to keep going.

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  • Maybe he thought it was a trap question (ie he thought you would have reacted badly if he'd said he wanted to see you naked). Either that or he's teasing you so you go after him sexually. Could be either.

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  • Anon, in the Christian faith we're called to abstain from sexual immorality and every other kind of evil. I'm just letting you know that he may not desire that until after marriage. A believer may be tempted but that isn't good at all on the tempter if she/he knows what he/she is doing. Let me know if you want to discuss this more.

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  • Hea hust being polite. Coz being not could get him in trouble... He needs a dew more signs from u.. That its ok to let out the animal!!

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  • Its early and he may feel he doesn't want to push you. If you want it bring it up

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  • Well, my ex got sexual with me, which quite confused me since she said she didn't wanna have any sex with me.

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  • Being respectful or gay How are his kisses?

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  • He's being very respectful. I think he's waiting for you to be ready before doing anything.

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  • yeah he is probably religious and a virgin.

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    • 3mo

      i can't get why all these religious guys get involved with secular girls and not of their own clique? do they have shit for brains?

  • he's probably not just attracted

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  • He might be still trying to figure you out. In some cultures, if a female comes on too strong, it could be a turn off.

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  • He's being reserved because of his culture.

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What Girls Said 4

  • That's... cringey. Absolutely no offense to him but if I flirt with a man sexually and he replies with an obedient: "oh no dear, don't worry dear" I'm going to turn into a desert down below.

    He likely is trying to be respectful of you, and respectful of his religion.

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  • Maybe he has respect for you and thinks it's too soon. And also his background probably plays a big part too

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  • Lol he is a respectful guy... Even though I'm not christian you could give me him anytime

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  • Yup its driving me crazy rn

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