I'm sad and nervous in my love life... do guys want perfection?

No matter how many guys tell me I'm pretty, I will never feel beautiful. My body isn't perfect, I have a huge forehead, my hair isn't thick and luscious. I see so many imperfections and I want nothing more than for someone to love me despite all that is wrong with me. Can guys love a girl despite less than perfect looks? I'm concerned I will never be enough.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • We all self criticize and tear ourselves apart in front of the mirror at times.
    Even those that rare men and ladies that appear as if they just dropped in from heaven for a short layover. It takes a lot of work to look like that and I promise you that there are moments that each of them look in the mirror at some point and say to themselves, "holy shit, is my nose getting bigger! why are my ears not level, and my right boob is bigger than my left". When you do fall in love, if it's right, then you will begin to understand that it doesn't matter much in the scheme of things. But even then you will occasionally find yourself in front of the mirror tearing yourself apart again.

    If you want some pointers, use the How do I look section and drop a few photos. I can promise you this you will get feed back. There will be some negative and some positive nothing is absolute, but you will also encounter members here who will actually give you some very good advice. Just be open to good criticism and guarded vs the mean and rude comments. I have seen folks on here chew up teenagers who do this and spit them out.

    Beyond all of that, stop fixating on yourself in the mirror. Dress sharp, smile and laugh, hang out and be social, be available. The rest will just happen.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Men will date a beautiful woman but will run once he finds out she is negative and lack self esteem and that's not fun to be around. He may stay to keep you as an option till he finds a less attractive woman but with a better attitude.
    That's why you hear all these beautiful women crying when their boyfriend leave fir less attractive wimen..
    Now you know what you need to do?

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What Guys Said 15

  • Girl listen, you are too obsessed with how you look, you aren't happy with this & that about your body, and more importantly what others think about you.

    Everyone is unique and perfect in how they look, learn to accept yourself as how you are and learn to live with it.

    It isn't like you have 1 leg instead of 2, damaged eye or something, be grateful for that because even the people who are disabled learn to live with themselves and make the best of what they have.

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  • Yeah to start with those are your own opinions about yourself so you can safely drop them because they have no meaning to him. Aside from that as long as you take care of yourself to a normal degree like cutting your hair every once in a while or other basic things its completely fine. You do not NEED to look perfect and in fact that can scare guys away. How are they to measure up against your perfection? Do they deserve you at your best?

    Here is my little tip though~
    Every once in a while you should put on your best makeup and dress yourself in your best clothes to surprise him. Having those moment be special instead of every day is much more powerful.

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  • Yes we can love a women on character, and integrity. What makes you think these so called porn stars, models, actors, etc; is perfect? You have no clue what they struggle with, just because they Appear to have nothing wrong doesn't mean they are perfect because they aren't. Most things are based on false images.
    Get rid of your negative thoughts first! What you think about yourself is displayed. What a man thinketh he becomes.
    Boys yes want the perfect women, when they themselves don't live by there own standards. Men don't want perfection because we aren't ourselves. A man is looking for a women that would be a good match for us, we would complement one another. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

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  • Yes of course we can i can what others may say about you as negative i would only see beauty looks are just something we notice and like for a split second well at least that's how i feel. But to get to know the person more is more meaningful than looks if a pretty giro has a bad personality and has no respect for other nope not going to work out but a girl who is lacking in looks with a great personality and respectful can 5times more atttactive to me don't stress out there are good guys out there who don't think much of looks.

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  • My sex dripping wet girl!.. You imperfections define you!.. You don't need to be the Barbie doll... I hate those plastics!.. Those imperfection are so hot to admire and adore!.. Look nice,.. Be yourself don't try to be perfect

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  • i dont care about looks that much, and i would love to date a girl who's like you, who's insecure and thinks her body is not perfect. i would love to date a girl like you so because i can love her soo much that she realizes that i really love her imperfections and i truly love her

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  • Perfection isn't necessary.

    Weigh what you should (don't be overweight/fat) and you'be automatically got a leg up on about 75% of women.

    If you have a pleasant personality, too, that will put you in the top 5-10%.

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  • As the matter of fact, people are terrified of "perfection". Perfection is surreal and once you meet it , it seems shady. Nobody deep down actually wants perfection and are at least a little bit creeped out by it.

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  • maybe you have a beauty that is more in the inside that radiates to the outside so when you smile an angel is born :)

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  • Yes I can love a girl even if she is not perfect... NoBody is perfect by the way..

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  • My girlfriend is as ugly as a mud fence, and I'm good looking. That is, however, her only flaw. Everywhere else she's normal or better. Except personality, she's superior there.

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  • No I don't want perfection. I'm actually a little scared by it because I'm not perfect.

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  • Of course not but some of us are not attracted to insecurity.

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  • well, based on ur description, ur justified to think like that actually

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  • Yeah of course but you sound like you're worse critic

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What Girls Said 5

  • No one is perfect, so if they are seeking a perfect partner (if we are talking about societal perfection, not what an individual can consider perfect), they will end up alone.

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  • nobody is perfect, it's a fairy tale
    there will be a guy who will love you the way you are
    just be friendly and cheerful, be who you are and also try to dress up or wear make up to some gain confident, we're insecure bcoz we don't believe in ourselves, so fix the flaws

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  • When you are insecure about looks, it's a great time to focus on habits/personality.

    Improvement in habits/ better behaviors leads to positive mind which will then reduce your insecurity.

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  • Well in earth life I know that they don't but they would like something good.
    But in funny life they would like something cool.
    In sports life they want an almost perfect player.
    In love life they want a great connection.
    In alien life they want high tech UFOs.

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  • You have some serious issue.
    Nobody is perfect. Everyone is beautiful on their own way. MANY GUYS told you you are pretty.
    Despite of your imperfect body, huge forehead, your hair, they told you you are pretty.
    You need to concern about your mental issue not your look. You will never be enough because that's what your mind is telling you. you need to learn to appreciate yourself first.

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