My boyfriend and I are both 21 and have been dating for just over three years. Recently one of his coworkers who is a much older woman, somewhere around 50 years old, has asked him to be her date to her daughter's wedding. The daughter getting married is somewhere around 30 years old.
At first I was okay with the idea, because she is so much older, but now I have begun to rethink this all. This weekend it was brought to my attention that he doesn't always behave what most would consider to be "appropriate" for someone who is in a relationship, around other girls our age.
We were out with friends, two other guys and two other girls, when we ran into two more guys and one more girl. The girl we ran into is always overly friendly with him and often ignores that I'm even there. The two other girls we were with, one of the other guys, and myself were all concerned with the way they interacted with each other. The other girls and guy brought it to my attention that they were concerned, I did not bring it up first, so I know they weren't just agreeing with me.
It also made me realize a while back that a different girl had sent him a full body picture of herself to show him her "outfit". Being a girl myself I know that isn't something girls send to any guy and I would not send something like that to a guy I wasn't interested in.
I feel like he is sometimes too friendly towards other girls, giving them the wrong ideas, and this is a bad representation of us and our relationship and also disrespectful to me, his girlfriend.
I now think him going as this older woman's date to a wedding would reflect poorly on us and our relationship as well. Am I right in thinking so?
- Yes, I agree with you.Vote A
- No, I disagree with you.Vote B
Most Helpful Guy
I wouldn't be too concerned about any of this. People going to behave inappropriately for the rest of your life so you have to start to deal with it. The only thing that's important is how your boyfriend behaves and if he crosses the line. Making you feel uncomfortable one thing, crossing the line and something else.
As for this older woman, believe me you have nothing to worry about. If your young friends don't like the idea, then that is their problem. However this older woman has a genuine need and when you reach that age you'll understand that so let your boyfriend go to the wedding with her and let it be the good deed that it is. You will be rewarded with Good Karma.
All of this said, keep your eye on your boyfriend just in case it does look like he is going to cross the line. Once he does he's gone. You need to give him the opportunity to cross the line to understand if he's a douche bag or not.1
Most Helpful Girl
I can tell you what will be on the 50 year old woman's mind. Most menopausal women I know are experiencing a high sex drive. Women's sex drive increases with age while a man's sex drive decreases. I know if I were the woman he was going with I'd be doing everything I could to get him up in me as many times as I could.
If you're OK with him making a Cougar's day then let him go. If you're wanting to keep him for yourself then it's not such a good idea.0
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