If a guy in his early 20s were to date a high school girl of legal age (17 years old), will their perspectives of the relationship be different?

I would see it as her being dainty, innocent, and easy to please. High school girls tend to be puppy lovish and "high" on love and feelings, which I like.

Where she may see it different. She may look at it in a different way and think I selected her because she had mature attributes and she has what it takes to be in an adult relationship.

In summary, I don't see her as my age, but I see myself as her age. I know what contradicts itself. Meanwhile, she see's herself as older.

Girls, how would your thoughts be on dating an older guy? How do you think he views you or the relationship?

  • Yes
    68% (27)39% (12)55% (39)Vote
  • No
    12% (5)16% (5)14% (10)Vote
  • See poll
    20% (8)45% (14)31% (22)Vote
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Most Helpful Girl

  • My views of myself dating an older guy would be... fine. I'm 24, almost done school. Mentally, I feel zero interest in dating/fucking around for shits and giggles. I'm only interested in the stability and such that a LTR would offer so, assuming that this guy is not >10 or so years older than me, it'd be fine.

    A guy in his early 20's with a 17 year old though? Not so sure. If I look back at myself as a 17 year old and compare my mindset and sense of self then to what I feel now, or in the past few years- huge difference. There's a huge amount of maturation, both mental, sexual, etc. that goes on in the few years that separate the couple. It might work, but both would have to always keep these differences in mind and behave accordingly.

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    • 3mo

      When you were 17 and an older guy had interest in you, what would go through your head?

    • 3mo

      not much other than probably being a bit intimidated.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm not touching this

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What Girls Said 14

  • If a guy in his early 20's were to hit on me I would assume that he is just a virgin hunter trying to get some pussy by trying to manipulate me since he thinks I'm so naive due to my age.

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    • 3mo

      Nah baby i would treat you like my queen

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    • 3mo

      Eww, no I hadn't noticed. I was just going on what was in the question.

    • 3mo

      @zagor
      Now I hope I have clarified why I'm attacking this dude. :))
      I don't think like this about every guy in his age range who wants to date slightly younger girls (17-18 years olds, however it would be questionable if the girl is 15 or 16...), this opinion was personalized for him.

  • I understand what you feel, Sir... and it sucks. I was 18 with a 22 year old... he saw it as a fling. I didn't necessarily get attached... but all he did was kiss and finger me. I think I only gave him a handjob!! It only lasted a month and a half :( ... my advice is don't let her get too attached to you. Do what feels right... but don't make her think you want something serious... IF you don't :)

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  • I have an older boyfriend and I hope we both just feel lucky to have each other. Maybe I shouldn't talk but I think a girl in HS and a guy in his 20's is just wrong though and I have my views on guys who do that.

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  • Well I guess this kinda falls with where my boyfriend and I are... I'm 17 and he is 20. He is a Junior in College and I am a Junior in High School. With him, there is no pressure. He sees me. Yeah he works a lot and has classes that just started but he makes time for me. I know it is hard for us to see each other because of my parents but we make it work and my parents really don't pry into my relationships. (I'm the only child they don't do that with) Yeah there is a gap in our age but we aren't that far apart. We see things differently at times but that is normal for people. Being a girls first love isn't always the best thing. My Boyfriend isn't my first love. I loved one other guy besides him and that was my first boyfriend that I started dating at 14... We were together til I was 16 1/2. Then he cheated on me. Not all relationships are perfect. Heck no relationship is perfect.

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    • 3mo

      Do you see him as an "older guy" or the same age? And how do you think he views you?

    • 3mo

      Yes I see him as an older guy. He is almost 4 years older than me with the way our birthdays land. And he has explained the way he views me. I know that I don't know as much about the world as he does. But I am extremely mature for my age. I also raised 2 kids. No they are not mine. They are my brothers. I don't act like a normal teenager. I don't look like one either. He sees me as a girl that is about his age and is an outgoing person.

  • Good luck on going through all that hell of explaining to the girl's parents your purpose of dating her, following their curfew, the father wanting to rip you to pieces if you break her heart or you never end up being engaged to her, etc.

    Are you sure you want to go through all that instead of dating a college girl in her 20's?

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    • 3mo

      But I rather be a girl's first love.

    • 3mo

      So are you willing to go through all that hell? Wouldn't it be cool dating a grown up that doesn't have to rely on her parent's curfew (basically that would be like dating a grown up child)?

  • I think her dad should beat your ass.

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  • She could feel different, as the guy is a few years older. But, there are exceptions where the girl is looking for a serious relationship, as she is feeling and acting more mature.

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  • Speaking as someone who is currently 17, wait to date someone until they are 18. I think I am a mature person as far as socially and mentally, but in sexual situations, I already know I'm not. Just wait, don't be that guy.

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  • 1 legal age is 18 consenting age is 16 which means she's old enough to say yes to sex to anyone 16-18 anyone older it has to be approved by parents and before 18 parents have the right to veto anyone she dates

    So i hope u have mommy and daddys stamp of approve for dating or dating and sex

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  • Likely, yes. Although it really depends on the maturity.

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  • Yhhh

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  • Just wait til she's 18 dude you don't need to be dating a minor.

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    • 3mo

      The age of consent isn't 18 in every state.

    • 3mo

      @zagor The age of consent can be 16, but I know that in a lot of states that's part of a Romeo and Juliet law which basically means 16 year olds can have sex with 16 and 17 year olds. In my state it's like that. But a 16 year old can't have sex with an 18 year old because it's paedophilia.

    • 3mo

      No, its just having sex with a minor. A pedophile is someone sexually attracted to children. A 16 year old is deemed too young to consent to sex with an adult, but is not physically a child.

  • I see nothing wrong with it. As long as the couple knows what they want from each other.

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  • Every girl I knew who dated older at that age really thought they were just very mature and that must be why he chose her out of all the other young girls.

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    • 3mo

      That is not always true, especially with me. But that isn't a bad thing either. A girl's youthfulness is attractive to me.

      As long as I love her and genuinely care for her, I dont see an issue.

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    • 3mo

      But in that case would a girl's feelings for me be based on false perception then, thus making all the feelings between us null and void

    • 3mo

      Not really. She likes you, she just assumes you like her for other reasons. Like I might think my boyfriend loves me for my sense of humor but really he loves my cooking or something, I don't know... Can't explain it well lol.

What Guys Said 5

  • Go for it , don't give a fuck go for it listen to me. You raise the girl yourself and you will never lose her.

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  • Girls seem to mature a lot faster than guys at least mentally and are tougher when it comes to relationships and heartbreak. The age difference in my view is actually very small and really even ten years is not such a big difference.

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  • I'd say it will be hard. Though some girls seem "mature" they still dont know what they want from their lives. I only see this as a heartbreak for you once she changes her mind and decides she's too young to get serious.

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  • KInd of depends on what experience he's had. If he's a virgin and she's not, then probly not. Everybody's gonna be different on this.

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  • Adults have no business with minors.

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