Great chemistry, both physical and emotional... But I have to make all the effort which is frustrating? Do I give up or persevere?

I've been seeing a guy for two months. He was definitely more into me than I was into him after the first date and he was really keen to set up a second date. We just kissed on both the first and second date and it was great, good chemistry and felt really natural. But then he got weird. When I asked him about meeting up again, he said he was conflicted... that I was great, smart, funny... but he was worried he'd hurt me. He'd been in a very long term relationship which hadn't ended well and since then, couldn't imagine himself in another relationship.

Anyway... we did meet up again. We get along so well, it's very natural and relaxed and comfortable but also a great spark sexually. However, I always have to text him first. While there's sometimes a delay in his responding, he usually comes back chatty and we make plans for another date.

I know I should read all the signs... He's just not that into me. But I haven't felt a connection like this in a long time (I'm not just reading into something that isn't there). I know he definitely likes me too... and think it's some sort of weird fear since his last relationship. Do I stay proud and give up? Or do I swallow my pride and persevere just in case it's really special?

i last met him 4 days ago and sent a text this evening which he hasn't replied to...


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What Guys Said 2

  • Look if he's anything like me, Sometimes I don't see a text for 24 hours.

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    • 3mo

      Thanks I hope so.
      It's whatsapp so I know he's been online just hasn't opened my text.
      Which probably just means he's busy and will reply later.
      I guess I just wish I was more of a priority for him

  • He doesn't like you too, and you are just reading in something that isn't there- your 'connection' is imaginary. You're head over heels, and you've fallen hard for this guy, precisely because he's showing you that he isn't that bothered about you or that interested in you- that's just the fucked-up way that attraction works for girls, when it comes to guys. The less attention he shows, the more 'mystery' there'll be, building more intrigue and invoking more sexual interest from you. Either he's a pro who knows perfectly how to play you, or he genuinely doesn't give a damn about you and he'll just fuck around with you for a bit before moving on without a care in the world, just like he did with the last. Trying taking a step back and thinking with your head, instead of going on instinct and following your bean.

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    • 3mo

      I know this is so true!!! :-(

What Girls Said 1

  • He probably wants to play the field... That's what he's basically saying.

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