I have depression and some days are much harder then others, my boyfriend notices when something is wrong and he always tries to fix the problem. sometimes there isn't really anything "wrong" I am just feeling "down" but he can't seem to grasp the fact that this just happens kinda of "there has to be a problem therefore a solution" kind of thinking and he won't leave me alone until I tell him what is wrong. So I just make something up so he can console me about that so he feels that he has helped me, and he continues with his day thinking that if I seem off that it is because of what I told him. should I stop doing this and tell him what's going on or just continue?
- Explain to him what is going on100% (20)100% (13)100% (33)Vote
- Continue what I am doing0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
Most Helpful Guy
Guys are naturally problem-solvers. We don't talk about our problems or feelings just to share them - in fact, we usually only do so if we think the other person can help us fix the problem. That's just how our brains work. But most guys honestly don't understand that women's brains don't work that way, and that they have to share, but that they really only want the guy to LISTEN, and not to try to find a solution.
I recommend you both watch this video and then talk about it:
Most Helpful Girl
I don't think it is fair to tell someone your problems and then be mad if they want to help. I'm a problem solver and had a huge conflict of personality with my ex, so much that we broke up. I think you should try to accept that he is a problem solver. And depression is a solvable problem, by the way. I used to have severe depression and I "healed" my brain over the course of several years. Maybe he doesn't know how to help you, but at least let him show his sympathy in his own way.0