Is this a good way to get his attention?

Basically I met a guy a while back (IRL!) and we instantly hit it off. We spent a lot of time together on a volunteer trip with another girl (she was how we met) and we got on like a house on fire. He asked me out for coffee a week after the trip but then me and the other girl fell out in between and he suddenly cancelled the day before, saying he had "double booked". Then nothing, no response for months.

I was disappointed but moved on (other than a drunk message a few months later in which I said I really thought he was a great guy). He replied with a polite "thank you but I am busy/have confidence issues")

I left it again and he contacted me out of the blue last week. I was so excited we ended up agreeing to meet at mine for a smoke and a film (I KNOW this was a poor choice!). He spooned me the next day, it was very intimate, but I feel like I gave him the impression I was all about sex. Since then he has ignored two messages from me. We are so compatible I want to show him that I do have respect for myself and my time and am not a slut.

Should I send another final message like this: (I accidentally called him this morning trying to delete our message thread!!)

Hey! Sorry I just called you, it was an accident! Let's go out and have some fun sometime! I wanted to get to know you before jumping into bed, I just got carried away last week :)

Update- he didn't seem like the player type- he also seemed a little nervous to start with when we were fooling around- like he was nervous making a move and not that experienced


Most Helpful Guy

  • Wow - you're the girl (type) of my dreams.
    Regarding this guy - maybe tone it down a little/take it a bit easier - if he says he's got confidence issues, your upbeat text might just remind him of it (and people hate being reminded of their own deficiencies).
    Can you not try to see him somewhere you know he will be - and then just keep getting along/let him loosen up a bit and start to enjoy you and your company (safely - in the emotional sense (clarifying for any butch feminists around, sorry))?


Most Helpful Girl

  • If he felt strongly for you, spooning and being romantic wouldn't have put him off one bit. The fact that you feel it did, tells me he is just not that into you and is testing the waters out with you but is not 100% sure. You aren't a slut for spooning with a friggen guy. Any one who makes you feel that way is not worth it anyway.


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What Guys Said 4

  • yeah sure, but he wanted you only for sex and now that he has had sex with you I don't think he'll put much effort

  • No he's just trying to sleep woth you move On

  • He thought he was getting a bj but he just got spooned


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