My long term girlfriend (want to marry her) and I have a great relationship but we differ on one aspect which I take very seriously, parents, in my culture it is not uncommon for children to stay with their parents and to take care of them when they get older, my girlfriend on the other hand says that children should move out at 18 and that its childish if you don't, as well as stating when parents get old you quote on quote, "put them in the old folks home", it seems like in America there is a stigma of living with ones parents, another thing I notice about America is that people seem to have horrible relationships with their parents along with a lot of broken households, how do I go about solving this problem, I work with my father in his business and the way the house is situated, it is 2 story and has two separate entrances, picture a separate apartment in a house ( has its own kitchen, living room, etc) that is connected to my parents side through only one door, so privacy is not a problem I have my own separate garage as well. The relationship is great but I just have this one problem with her, I love her very much but one thing that really gets under my skin and bothers me not just with my girlfriend but with people in general is how elders are looked down upon as if they are disposable and once they pass on its all about money, it irks me, I guess it is a culture shock for me at my age seeing how nasty parents and children here talk about each other or treat each other, parents throwing kids out and kids treating parents like garbage. and I really dont know what else I can do to stop my girlfriend from attacking me on this issue, no I do not want to break up with her like I said I plan on marrying her but how can I talk to her and have a rationale conversation? Thank you for your help.
Most Helpful Girl
Are you wanting you guys as a couple to stay in the same home as your parents forever? Maybe a compromise. You guys get your own place now and then when your parents need assistance you guys of course move them in. Is that more of what she means? As an American I do agree that we don't value that family unit very well, we value independence, but many of us are very open to parents moving back in. We are doing this with my grandfather and my husband and I have always agreed this will be the case if needed with our own parents.1