Is it okay to date your not so close girl friend's ex?

I mean i have known the girl for years now, but we only talk maybe once in 3 months when we meet for group outings, and were not like very close. Just casual talk. Just afraid it might get weird. although the guy has already showed some interest in dating me. am i like going against girl code if i go ahead and date this guy?

Updates:
2mo Forgot to mention, that the not so close girl friend is already in another relationship!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • with due respect to your friendships, you should tell her you're gonna date him. and see how she reacts - but that doesn't mean you should act differently towards her if you want to know the guy
    chances may be she will be like "do it! i dont care really" :) so far so good!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If she is 'Already in another relationship,' and there are No guarantees how this would Work out anyways with 'This Guy,' then Accept a Date from him and See if there is Something more to it.
    For now, Silence is Golden. Nothing but Death and Taxes anyways is a Sure thing in Life. And Being you Both don't have this "Pinkie Swear Relationship" as True friends to the Ends, I would say, he is Up for Girl Grabs.
    Let your Conscientious and your Heart and your own Head be your Guy Guide.
    Good luck and Go Slow with Joe. xx

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    • 2mo

      Thank you for your opinion :)

    • 2mo

      You are so welcome. Hang out for now and be friends with him and see what will come next. You might find he is not for you. xx

    • 1mo

      Thank you for the Vote of Confidence. xx

What Guys Said 8

  • Have a talk with your friend. Not saying you need her approval, but if maintaining eachothers friendship is important to you the only real way to find out is to get her opinion. We can all give our opinions, but ultimately your friend is the only one who can tell you for sure whether she's fine with it or not.

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  • I think dating a friend's ex is ALWAYS a bad idea. If you know how the r/s was with your friend then it should be like a road map on just how your's maybe if you choose to go down this road. If your friend is in another r/s and you guys don't see each other too often as mentioned then I think you should call just letting her know on the simple fact that you still keep in touch and that when that one time of you and her ex are out and about in town and somehow see her and her man then you won't have to explain and it won't be abrupt like WTF? Ughhhhh moment ya know? I know your not close friends BUT you have kept the friendship going for years right, it's just the courtesy call that will matter to her that even though you two are not close that you took the option of being a better woman and let her know.

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    • 2mo

      i understand what you mean! yeah its been at the back of my head for days, but yeah i've been meaning to talk to her about it. thanks for your opinion :)

  • I'd ask the girl if she is cool with you dating her ex. Though I don't think she would mind. He is her ex. Plus the guy has showed some interest in dating you. But, I would still double check with the girl if she's cool with you dating her ex boyfriend. She could get mad or something and try to ruin you guy's relationship if you guys go out due to jealousy

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    • 2mo

      Oh snap, she is in another relationship lol. then go for her ex. Doesn't matter. She's moved on obviously.

    • 2mo

      Thank you for your opinion! :)

    • 2mo

      No problem. Anytime :)

  • No problem if they are thoroughly split up, to the point she's in another relationship. She doesn't own the guy now.. if she ever did!

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  • since you guys are only acquaintances i don't think you need to worry about. if it was a closer friend i would suggest just letting her know but since it's not a close friend i think you are free to do whatever

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  • go for it the guy likes u and u like him :)
    she lost her shot
    just do it :)

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  • go for it she is in another relationship
    it shouldn't bother her

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  • Yeah u can date with anyone

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What Girls Said 10

  • Its not about the 'girl code', but wither or not this decision is going to effect the people around you and the relationship overall. To be honest, if its okay by your friend and she won't get jealous and have moved on, go for it. But if it will cause a problem, just leave it. Other than that, I wouldn't encourage it as I wouldn't do it myself. The relationship ended for a reason, always remember that. If you can't be responsible for the consequences of it, it is best to stay out of it. But the choice is up to you.

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    • 2mo

      She is already in another relationship! sorry forgot to mention that!

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    • 2mo

      but if she is already in another relationship, then doesn't that mean she has moved on?

    • 2mo

      @2Chocopie28 NO. Because there are a lot of people who are in relationships and marriages and they still haven't let go. Always watch for scowling looks, anger, bitterness, etc. Body language included.

  • Ehhhh... you guys aren't even really friends.. you just hang out in the same group sometimes. I think it's fine.. It would be POLITE and very considerate of you to ask her, though I personally don't think you need permission given the type of relationship you guys have.

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  • Its up to you who you want to date. Your not so close friend shouldn't have a problem with it if he's her ex, plus the fact that she's with someone else means that she's moved on anyway and is over her feelings for him. . . surely. Just notify her about it, so that you don't end up springing that on her at the last kick. Like when you two are out together and end up meeting her in town.

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  • Hmm, that's tricky. I mean, I don't think it'd be so bad since she's in another relationship, she's not that close, and the guy seems to like you. However, if you want to truly feel comfortable, it may not hurt to ask her how she feels about the situation. At the end of the day, it comes down to what you and the guy want, but it seems you'll have reservations about it if she ends up not being okay with things.

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  • Yeah I don't see why not? Both of you aren't so close but be prepared for some unnecessary drama 😂

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  • It is if you don't care about losing her.

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  • I Think You Should Do What Your Heart Tells You.

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  • You're aquaintences at best, I don't see a problem!

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  • You can date anyone that you like, so go for it

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  • You would be if you didn't ask what she thought about it. Ask her if she would be okay with it.

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