All of my friends are in serious relationships right now. I'm just working and going to school. I don't have friends at school and the girls I work with already have their established friends outside of work. I've been feeling very lonely lately but I've been trying to ignore it by throwing myself into just work and school. My friends suggested I get a boyfriend so I'm not so lonely but I don't know how it feel about using someone like that. What do you think?
Would you get into a relationship out of loneliness?
What Guys Said 15
Do you let your friends dictate everything to you in life? When they tell you that you should get a boyfriend you will? When they tell you this profession isn't worth doing? You'll leave it? When they tell you to jump off the roof, would you?
Here's a lesson for life, it's good to have friends but family is more important than friends, your friends in couple of years would chosen different paths and get busy, while your family would still be there.
Bottom line, don't act on what others tell you to do, you've a brain, think and decide for yourself, so you have only yourself to blame for it.0
But you're not using them? You do have a right to want to be with someone - for whatever reason. Wanting to abolish loneliness does not equate to using a person. You want their company but if they remain with you then that means they want your company as well.1
Well I'm very lonely and I do want a relationship so bad. And I think it's natural to desire a relationship when you are lonely. But I think the important thing is don't just date someone to say you're taken. Be patient and find someone that you love. It's hard, and believe me I know, but it will be so much more satisfying 😊0
Nope. Been there, done that. You should date someone because you want to, not just so you can date for the sake of dating. It doesn't make you happier and in fact you can still feel lonely. Plus you hurt the other person.
I was also used as a rebound recently with someone I genuinely liked and it's a very shitty feeling. You feel used and as if everything they said was a lie to manipulate you. Generally they leave if their ex comes back or if they found someone "better".
It can also put you in their shoes.0
Yeah it's called a rebound. I've done it before.
However I think your friends mean for you to look for a guy and actually be with him for him, not just for *someone* to fill in a void.0
the way guys are now especialy around your age, this is not a good idea, unless you are ok with having sex with them relatively quickly
You will only have momentary relief. If you aren't looking for a boyfriend, or want one for love and companionship, you might be setting yourself up for failure
I say, try dating a man, your friends recommend, see how that goes
No. That's just terrible.!0
Isn't that why people seek companionship to stave off loniless...1
That's one reason why lots of people get into relationships, fear of loneliness , I think you should only date then if you have a good connection with that person1
Find someone who is equally lonely and then just be lonely together. Its hard thou0
I would do it if I could. I am very lonely, but I couldn't get a girlfriend even if I was the only man on this planet0
That's just desperation, so no.0
I used to be kind of like that for some time, after coming to the states, felt pretty hopeless. have you considered joining some school activities0
What Girls Said 11
Same thing here. I've honestly thought about it, but I know if I had a boyfriend that would be the only close relationship I would have. I'm at an age where I should be hanging out with a lot of people, having fun experiences, and the seriousness of a relationship really isn't something I want right now. Like you said, it feels unfair to use someone to distract me from loneliness when they're probably looking for a life partner. Right now, I'm just trying to distract myself with making as many new friends as possible and getting into some hobbies. It's super lonely, but I think I'll wait until I feel more independent and complete by myself to get a boyfriend. It totally sucks, but try finding things you're 100% happy to do by yourself. Join a book club. Volunteer. Distract yourself so much you forget what you're distracting yourself from. And hopefully a guy will come along after that. Hang in there!0
If you are really lonely, you need to seek friends who you have things in common with. I was really lonely so I Started dating but I dated a few guys before settling. You don't have to settle down with the first guy. You can use the loneliness as a reason to go on more dates with lots of people, and make new friends0
Nope. Not if I didn't feel it. Not even with someone awesome. I've had really great guys wanna be my boyfriend but was always like "meh.. don't wanna be tied down".
I'm never lonelier than when I'm intimate with someone who feels things for me I could never feel for him..0
This is the worst reason to get into a relationship, because you're settling for less than what will give you long-term satisfaction just to feel better right now. That won't end well - and it will end very quickly.
The best thing you can do to feel less lonely is get involved in a group that's relevant to your interests. If you don't think you have any groups that are, then try something new. If you get involved with people who enjoy what you enjoy, you may meet someone special who already has one big thing in common with you :)0
Just get a puppy and buy him sweaters.
I feel the same even though I'm 15. Everyone is getting into serious relationships and I'm over hear all quiet and bored studying0
Bad advice, Bad friends.
Just do what makes you happy regardless if you have friends or not. It's wrong of your friends to pressure you into just getting a boyfriend for the sake of not being lonely. A relationship is a big thing and it doesn't seem like it's something you're wanting right now.0
Nah it's pointless0
Not again, as I lived to regret it, we also attract the wrong people when we're lonely/vulnerable best to stay strong and struggle through until u meet someone right or get out and date/play the field0
No way, I'd find things to do on my own, ya never know.. You could develope a life of your own (outside of school and work) and a guy may come along naturally and you won't have anything to feel guilty about. Also, by finding your own things to do and meeting new people along the way, you wouldn't have as hard of a time of the relationship fails.0
Select as Most Helpful Opinion?
You cannot undo this action. The opinion owner is going to be notified and earn 7 XPER points.