He won't stop pressuring me for sex, what should I do?

So there's this guy I really like, we hang out pretty frequently. He only texts me when he wants to hang out and he is just really inconsistent. So whenever we hang out its always in his car at a discrete spot. We talk but then we always end up making out. The problem is he tries to pressure me into having sex with him. For example last night we hung out and we started making out and he kept trying to pull down my pants and take off my bra after I told him multiple times no. Also when we make out I'll climb on top of him and twerk on him but he always keeps trying to get into my pants even though I said no. After we made out I explained to him again how I'm not ready to have sex with him yet and he just made fun of me for the fact that I'm not ready. I told him he was being an asshole and he replied with you're being an asshole for not putting out that ass and then he laughed after. What should I do?

Updates:
2mo Ok so we also started arguing because I told him how I didn't want him to stick his hands down my pants cause I'm not ready and he replied with coming from the girl who just grabbed my dick and then laughed. Did he have a right to stick his hands down my pants if I grabbed his dick?
2mo Am I dealing with a "bad boy"?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • "He only texts me when he wants to hang out" So he's only there when he needs you then? Bad sign.
    "The problem is he tries to pressure me into having sex with him. For example last night we hung out and we started making out and he kept trying to pull down my pants and take off my bra after I told him multiple times no." And you like him?
    "he always keeps trying to get into my pants even though I said no." He's a potential rapist. Trust me you could have found better.
    "he just made fun of me for the fact that I'm not ready." No empathy, no respect, mere lust. I don't have much respect for such people, those violent animals. Neither should you.
    "he replied with you're being an asshole for not putting out that ass and then he laughed after." He's a rapist, an asshole, a player, a bitch, a disrespectful mocking motherf... er and all around bastard. Did I forget something?
    "What should I do? " Tell him to go fuck himself. Never to his face as he'd use violence. But yeah dump him at the very least, and use only your phone for this.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • STOP HANGING OUT WITH HIM! That is what you do. Why are you putting yourself and dignity at risk over a loser? That's exactly what he is. He just wants sex, and you placed yourself in a very dangerous situation here. If he wanted to rape you, he could have done so on the spot. Because you placed yourself there. Why did you let him take off your clothes? Why tweak on him? Be on top of him? Because you did that of your own free will. Your turning him on for sex, yet you have no problem teasing him. That situation is extremely bad. Stop it and move on. No man in their right man wants to deal with that. Your frustrating him, and god forbid he rapes you, partial of that will be your fault because you places yourself there.

    I don't like the guy, but I can get at him when your doing something that you shouldn't be doing. You say you don't want sex, but honey I'm warning you now, seriously. Either get your act together and tell that loser you will not be speaking to him again, or prepare for the consequences later if he is not in the right state of mind and either rapes you or kill you/ maybe both because of your choices. I'm being honest and serious with you here. Stop it and move on. What goes up must come down.

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    • 2mo

      Update: No, he doesn't have a right but shouldn't have touched him in a sexual manner either. Again. Your putting yourself in a situation you don't need to be in. Plus he is not a bad boy. Bad boys are often misunderstood people who prefer to be alone but if not, have a group of like minded indivisuals as a cover for his insecurities as a person. Because their afraid to get hurt. They can do BAD all by themselves and their good at it. However they aren't bad people to begin with. Its just a label by people who judge them.

      But what your dealing with is a jerk and a punk who wants to use you. A player at best if not something else. That's it. And many players are often after sex and increase their numbers of sex partners. He does that to humiliate you and doesn't think of you as a human but his personal sex toy.

What Guys Said 11

  • This is as much your fault as it is his and something a lot of modern women have a problem understanding.

    It does sound like he only wants sex from you and that's probably it considering he only texts you when he wants to hang out in a secluded area.

    The issue here is that you gave him sexual signals by grinding him and grabbing his dick. Then when he goes in for his move you deny him.

    This is the issue I have with the whole "No Means No" movement. Boys are taught and conditioned when they are young to constantly pursue while young girls are taught and conditioned to constantly resist. Surely, even the most hardcore feminist should be able to see how this leads to problems going forward.

    If you're just sitting there being all cute and innocent and then he starts making an aggressive sexual move on you, that would be wrong.

    However, you gave him signals to go for it yet you resisted him. Men know that some women just like to play hard to get so he decided to keep going for it because your words were saying "No" but your actions were saying "Yes"

    A lot of women will consider him a bad guy for being sexually aggressive with you but I don't think he is.

    As far as him being interested in only sex, that's a whole other issue.

    Good luck.

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  • If a guy who does that to you even though you barely know each other probably less than a year, then well he doesn't like you but only for sex... I'm glad you said no but there are better guys out there who will treat you better. In my perspective, even though you like him my advice to you is to leave him and find someone else better than him or you might regret because once he done those things with you, he will definitely leave you for someone and the cycle goes on. Goodluck!

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  • It's a very sexual situation, it's kinda strange that you don't want to get more sexual in a sexual situation. You can so no, but yes it's odd, and it's totally understandable that he would keep going for it.

    If you grabbed his dick then it's completely reasonable to assume you'd be into his hand down you pants.

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  • Stop hanging out with this boy... and I mean that... BOY... now.

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  • he sounds like an asshole for sure, dump his ass

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    • 2mo

      well yeah, if you grabbed his dick then he has the right for that

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    • 2mo

      @kittenmitten if she can grab his dick, then he can put his hands inside her pants too. if she doesn't like him to put his hands in her pants then she shouldn't grabbed his dick

    • 2mo

      Well it depends. Maybe she just wanted to be nice and give him a mere HJ. Once again there's no rule "you touch me therefore I may touch you". They both agree on the rules, whatever they are and only THEN do they play. But I agree he had the right to be confused because she acted as if she wanted it.

  • either u have sex with him..
    or
    take care of yourself and dont hang out with him.. he might end up forcing you which you will regret if you not ready..

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  • "accidentally" bite off his penis
    that will teach him

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  • Either have sex or dump. Quit being a little baby about it.

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  • Stop hanging out with him

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  • He doesn't 'really like' you. He had no interest beyond sex.

    If you want to fuck him you can but there's nothing else going on.

    You say you're 'not ready' but you two aren't going to be closer or more committed. You're talking like you haven't been dating long. There's no dating and there won't be.

    If that's not what you want, move on.

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  • He sounds like an asshole but you sound like you're teasing him too so, maybe both of you should hang out with someone else.

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What Girls Said 12

  • Stop meeting him hon he's just a user. Has he ever taken you out to dinner or on a proper date? Introduced you to his friends and family and everyone hung out? Nah. Because he only wants to bonk you. And you actually going to secluded spots with him on multiple occasions when you don't want to have sex is just silly! He's made it clear what he is after and the chances are that after you have slept with him... maybe a few times, he will stop contacting you.

    It certainly isn't gonna become a relationship and don't, PLEASE don't think that sleeping with him will turn you two into a relationship. Because we woman make that mistake all the time, we thing 'surely the sex will bond us together' and he will take me seriously afterwords. No. He won't.

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    • 2mo

      And no, he didn't have the right to stick his hands down there. BUT you shouldn't be meeting him in secluded spots and leading him on if you don't want sex, because sooner or later he is gonna start doing more and more stuff you don't want him to do.

    • 2mo

      Thiiiissssss

    • 2mo

      He sounds like a potential rapist

  • He's made it very clear what he wants and he doesn't even have the decency to take no for an answer. You ask what should you do? Well, I think it's pretty obvious. The guy is not going to change. He has a timetable in his head that he's working to. Move on from him because he will just keep upping the anti until you cave or he will leave and find someone who will put out.

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  • honestly you re partly to blame here
    why do you have the right to do stuff with him and him not
    why can you grab his dick and he can t
    why do you twerk
    why do you even hang out with him if you know his intentions and he made it pretty clear to you but you still go on so he thinks you re playing hard to get.
    in brief, stop sending him mixed signals, make a decision and stick to it.
    not yes yes no yes

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    • 2mo

      and he not*

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    • 2mo

      Only one way to find out... time to go out and survey 10,000 women. Lol nah I'm jk.

  • NOT SEE HIM. Girl you're telling him to stop trying to take off your bra and he won't. You're telling him to stop trying to take your pants off and he won't. Every time you see him he does this. It's fine to say you want to do other sexual acts besides sex. I would be fine with that. My husband was fine with waiting to have sex until I was ready (when we were dating). This douche is an asshole. FORGET HIM.

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  • Firstly, he's a complete assface. Secondly, you're not being fair to him, but considering that he's a dick it doesn't exactly bother me.

    Tip: if you don't want to do anything sexual with a guy don't "twerk" on him and grab his dick unless you've both established boundaries you're okay with

    Also: avoid guys like him

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  • Just start giving him the cold shoulder. stop wasting your time with guys that dont respect you. Ignore all his future calls and texts and never be alone with him again. this guy will probably rape you one day if you keep hagning out with him

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  • Either put out or move on. Getting on top of him and twerking while making out is dick teasing. You're lucky he didn't take you by force. You can't get a guy all worked up and leave him hang.

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  • Thats not cool. In no shape or form does he have the right to keep being consistent like that. NO is NO. And make it clear. Unless you wanna have to keep dealing with this guy. If he doesn't understand a simple No, then I would tell him to move along because he is crossing personal boundaries that he should respect.

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  • Ditch him. He's up to no good. He clearly only Sees you as a sexual object. Never See him again, don't even reply to his texts. I know you like him, but he's an asshole

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  • It's easy. He wants something you don't want and is trying to force you. Drop him pls!

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  • Yeah, you should prolly stop seeing him

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  • YOU STOP SEEING HIM.

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    • 2mo


      Grabbing someone's dick does not necessarily give them the right to stick their hands in your pants, but by doing so you are leading him on and giving him the impression you want something.
      Either you give up the little girl act and get on with it or you stop seeing him. Simple.

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