How can I get guys to see me as 'girlfriend material'?

I'm 19 and I've never been in a relationship. I have never even been kissed. People are always shocked to hear this because I'm often told that I'm gorgeous and should model or become a movie star. I am starting to feel that my looks are actually holding me back. I have very full lips (often told they are like kylie jenner lips) except I was born with mine. Men always approach me for sex or bl*wjobs and no one ever even TRIES to get to know me. I'm extremely intelligent and able to make anyone laugh. I have a kind heart and I know that I would have a lot to offer in a relationship but no one even gives me a chance. From the moment a man sees me his mind is on sex. Sometimes, they are bold enough to open the conversation by asking for a bl*wjob. It's starting to make me depressed. Is there anything I can do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well the first thing I suggest is to make it known to your date that your not putting out in any way until your married or engaged. That chases away a lot of guys right there that only want sex. After that I guess dress modestly. I suggest a nice shirt depending on where you are a long sleeve or short sleeve. Along with a long skirt and some nice shoes. Also act more like a lady which is an attitude and having an air about you. Have respect for yourself only spend time with the guys that you see as worth it or as your friends.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If you're done bragging about your beauty, you should go out and talk to a nice guy. Maybe stay away from frat houses and talk to a smart kid from class. Someone with more intelligence than a caveman.

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    • 2mo

      She is not attracted to nice guys or she would already be dating and getting with them. The ones that are bold enough to approach rarely, if ever fit the profile of the nice guy.

    • 2mo

      I see how I came across. It's just that I've asked this question before and I'll get rude comments saying that maybe I'm too ugly to find someone or maybe I'm beautiful but have no personality. That is why I listed the good traits that I feel I have. I just don't think it has anything to do with me not being enough. Maybe it was the wrong approach.

    • 2mo

      It's not so much that guys don't see you as girlfriend material, it's that the ones that are boyfriend material are boring / invisible to you.

What Guys Said 14

  • Go for older guys.
    Go for guys who are not sexually confident.
    Go for guys who are simply happy to have a girl talk to them and be their girlfriend.

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    • 2mo

      Nah she can't do any of that. Otherwise, she wouldn't be asking this question.

    • 2mo

      Where are they lmao

  • Stop using stupid dating apps they are basically for hooking up. It's like arranging a date carigslist and blaming men when it goes wrong. Duh you are basically using apps that people use to find strangers to have sex with. Go to a library and dress cute but not overtly sexy. Take classes at a University but spend time in library later in the semester all the idiots would have dropped out or they will not go to the library.

    The problem is how "YOU" are trying to find someone to date if you use okcupid, dating websites, and tender you will find a large amount of men that want to get in your pants. Stop using these things to find a date and you will have way fewer problems.

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  • Pick better people to hang around, it sounds like you have a bad group of friends that aren't bring the right people into your life, you can't change your features you have to embrasse them, your smart cool, you have hobbies an interest, even better! Keep going an just enjoy yourself, you dont need a relationship to prove that your good enough for someone

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  • Very good-looking and perhaps a tad bit unapproachable (because of your body language and perhaps the company you keep), so you only get approached by cocky players and bad boys. Go approach more serious guys.

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  • You will have to start liking good guys and give up on the bad boys or jerks. This is an almost impossible task for a 19 year old girl to do.

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    • 2mo

      Where are the good guys just wondering.. Seems made up

    • 2mo

      The good guys are your friends.

    • 2mo

      Good one @Amuro.

      Good guys are everywhere. However, you are probably talking to countless amount of bad boys. Good guys assume that you are interested in the bad guys, regardless of the reality. Most guys have witnessed way too often girls, especially good looking ones, fall into the arms of the type of guys that approached you. There isn't a whole lot you can do. I think the best thing is try to give some signals to the good guys that you are interested. You can really try approaching them.

      The first thing you need to do is stop paying so much attention to the hot guys. Yes, you probably are doing that, which is fine, since you are 19 and most females do not start looking at good men until they are 35.

  • approach the nice guys and dont let guys approach you because the ones who approach are usually players, plus all guys want sex with a girl. thats what makes them "girlfriend material" along with love.

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    • 2mo

      The nice quiet, boring guy in engineering is not going to approach her and ask her for bjs. She is not interested in nice guys, she is just annoyed that the jocks, bad boys and Chads don't see her as long term material.

    • 2mo

      @Truthatanycost Not at all true. The guys I like often tell me I'm "out of their leauge". That makes me uncomfortable and I always try to get them to see that we're equal. In the end they end up screwing me over. One guy was even bold enough to say he only wanted to hookup with me. He gave up after finding out that I was not going to sleep with him until I was in a relationship and in love.

  • "im not that kind of girl down to get on her knees for you, sorry. im Worth more than a quick fuck. Thanks but no thanks, seeyabye"
    something along those lines. Stand up for yourself and dont conform to a world of sluts and idiot males.

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  • Dress down, hide a little of that beauty and sensuality, then when he (whoever he ends up being) shows you he loves you then you can let it shine 100%

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    • 2mo

      Maybe you're right. I get approached way more when I don't wear makeup. At my old job I used to go without makeup everyday because I don't feel I need it. One of my nice coworkers was into me but when he saw my instagram he started telling me I was out of his league. I wasn't dressing revealing or anything I just had on makeup. Maybe that's what I should ditch?

    • 2mo

      Prob a good start

  • Don't look for a relationship.
    Do you.
    Get involved with things you enjoy.
    You'll meet someone worth it through that.

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  • Are you living in the ghetto or around a lot of black guys?

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  • you can't its our choice
    and with the way people are today half will see you as sex
    the other half
    will wanna get to know you
    and that tiny 000000000.1232323 percent wants you as a girlfriend

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  • How does one approach your for blowjobs?

    Hey, you're beautiful! Suck my dick?

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    • 2mo

      Most of the time that comes from men on dating apps and yes it's exactly like that. Sometimes accompanied by a dick pic.

    • 2mo

      Lol! So bold...

      Perhaps you're just not picking up subtle hints of interest irl

    • 2mo

      If you are using dating apps to find a boyfriend then this is kind of what you get. You keep doing the same thing over again expecting a different response.

  • Date less obnoxious men.

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  • Talk to them.

    You don't see someone as girlfriend material without spending time with them.

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What Girls Said 2

  • "I feel like my looks are holding me back"
    Yup that's it 😂😂😂😂😂

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  • depends on how you present yourself and what you write in your dating profile.

    anyone ask you that in person? and how do you respond verbally?

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