To stay or not to stay?

I have been in a committed relationship for almost 3 years. I am in my mid-twenties and he is my first boyfriend. However, he just moved several states across and now we are doing long distance. I love him so much, and I don't want to break up. But I always wonder if there is someone who could be more sure about me and would love me more. He finds me annoying sometimes since I am hyper and social and he is the opposite. He says he will maybe marry me one day. None of my friends really like him and my mom is unsure. But he does listen to my problems and he loves me. I don't know what to do. I keep on picturing a baby of his one day but then I also wonder what love would be like with someone else. I also don't want to do something I might regret. Can someone give me advice or tell me about a similar experience?


0|0
2|3

Most Helpful Guy

  • If he already moved I think it's best to move forward and move on. Unless somehow you are able to move closer to where he is now or within proximity such as no more than an hour or a few hours drive away. After all you did say he was your first boyfriend, meaning this is your very first long term relationship. And more often than not first time long term committed relationships will not last long or result in a marriage, but rather they are the process the beginning of a learning experience. You take what you learned and then when it is time to let go and move on because of circumstances, you will have to have the strength and will to let them go and not hang onto them anymore.

    by the way, did he ever say if he'll move back eventually or something? If not, I really think it's not really something that will work for the long term, at least not anymore. Otherwise if you really want to pursue and not let him go, figure out how to move to the same state or close to where he is living and working now, if possible. Otherwise, as I've said before, don't hang onto him anymore, and just let him go. Maybe, just maybe you two might get back together in the future some day, but it's not worth dwelling on it anymore and things had happen that are completely outside of your control when he had to move for whatever reason that might be.

    0|0
    0|1

Most Helpful Girl

  • Tough situation to be in. Go and write down the pro's and con's of the relationship but take your time with it and write it over a span of a few days to make sure you pinned down everything. Then objectively look at it and ask yourself if it is worth it. You are young, you still have plenty of time to spread your wings and date new guys. It's never too late to find love. It will be scary to break up and people worry about never finding love again, but it will find you. There are many compatible people out there. There's no such as only one soulmate.

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 2

  • Never be afraid to walk away from a relationship, even though it's already been 3 years. Although, honestly, 3 years is not that much in the grand scheme of things. The moment I saw the word long distance, was the moment all my previous memories of long distance came back to me. Long distance do NOT work. A relationship should consist of love, touch and compassion. Being long distance means there is no touch, a fundamental aspect to successful relationships. It could also mean that there is a higher chance now that he will cheat on you.

    My advice: Call it off now. I guarantee you there is someone out there that will love you to the ends of Earth. Someone that will respect you as a mature, fun and hyper woman. You just have to be patient. Never settle for less. Remember, you've been fed lies since you were young. There is no the One, but there are ones that suit you.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Should you stay or should you go now?
    If you go there will be trouble
    and if you stay it will be double

    If you love him, don't leave him. If you feel like you're missing out, break up with him.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 1

  • Is he not treating you right? Do you feel like you deserve better?

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...