as above, that really bothers me, i constantly keep getting compliments by men and women, that they think from my outlook, im hot, (im pretty tall and curvy type, but im a Asian girl so might be alittle different from the usual standard Asian look) im funny as well and seems fun to hangout with, but usually when they asked me about y status, they always surprised that im still single, and they were like, i think you are too picky! NO, i mean, not many guys approach me at all, (at least to me YES, not much) well, to make it clear, maybe those who i dont find very attractive usually are those who came and approach me, on some level i felt like losing alittle confident cos i always feel like, is that something wrong about me not being approachable? and why i only attract to guys i dont like,
Those guys who seem very attractive to me, usually we flirt or maybe went out a date or two, they pretty soon hinting sex and it seems like they just want to have sex or flings thats about it. And I dont think it count as picky when you dont want to settle down with someone who you don't find them attractive isn't it? Then i started to think, meh, i dont think im like that hot like you guys said? i dont know, maybe something wrong about me.
i did ask my guys friends, one or two saying im hot but people might find me intimidating, ok i admit i do have a RBF, i might look very confident from outside but i guess deep inside i know it isn't the reality, im alittle self-conscious. I reach a point im really frustrated about the fact its so hard to date these days, comparing to the past, yes, i dont jump into relationships like when i was young but is it that hard to just find a decent boyfriend? no dramas and i miss the time having a relationship!
Most Helpful Guy
Do not work on smiling or laughing or anything like that. Just be yourself. With all do respect to everyone who told you to work on smiling, I know they are just trying to help, but this will hurt more than help.
What if you started smiling and laughing and you got approached by more guys and landed a boyfriend, then you met the man of your dreams who happened to enjoy your RBF and hated all those forced fake smiles? Wouldn't the guys you landed with your fake smiles lose all meaning then?
Do you really want the start and base of a relationship to be rooted in fakery?
Do NOT get tricked into thinking that social trends and norms have any reflection on yourself.
A simple example of what I mean:
If you live in times where the majority of men just want sex from girls, and these men look at your face that does NOT project to them "easy sex", thus leading to the scenarios where you will not be approached much; Your status of being single is NOT a reflection on you. You have nothing to change. You being single in this case is indirect proof of your decency and respect.
See my point?
So please, do not get manipulated by social results.
They hold no value.
Just be yourself and if mister right comes then you will know he IS mister right because he fell for you, he did not fall for the act you were putting up.2
Most Helpful Girl
If you know you have RBF, change it. Consciously make the effort to smile, often and regularly. Then see what happens. A smile is like an open door. RBF, not so much.1