I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years... about 4 months ago. I went to visit my brother to Mexico city. I decided I was lonely and it was about time to have fun and meet someone, so I downloaded Tinder. I am 25 and I matched with this really cute guy (27) and we started talking for 2 days. He was funny, smart and looked really cute on his pics. He invited me to a bar and I decided to go out with him. We met and instantly clicked. I was so attracted to him and he seemed pretty attracted to me. He asked about my family and kept talking about the future and about his family and work. Some of his friends were there and we all talked and he told me his friends loved me and that I was so cool and thanked me for coming. We had a lot of drinks. Then we kissed and things got intense. We walked outside and just kept talking and he showed me the city, it was so much fun! We took an uber back to his apt. I was pretty wasted we hooked up. We didn't have sex, but got to 2nd base. In the morning we kissed some more and I touched him etc. I thought the night was amazing... but THEN he said something like why don't u wanna have sex, do you want a boyfriend? And I instinctively said "no, I just broke up so no lol" and then I wanted to go, I just felt weird waking up there next to him on the first date and I left. I didn't kiss him goodbye. Later that day I left town and he texted me saying he had an awesome time and that I should let him know when I am back in town. But after that, he just stopped texting, like nothing at all! From texting all the time the previous days, to zero! Was that just a hookup and nothing else? What should I expect? I want to see him again but maybe I do want a boyfriend and he just wanted to hookup... I will visit again soon. That's why I don't have casual sex. I get attached. What should I do? Do you think it's appropriate if I text him again once I am back in town?
Most Helpful Guy
Yeah he seems to be the guy who's not into texting. When two people live far off there is no point of texting... He seems to be more of a face to face guy like me. Text him when you are in his city1
Most Helpful Girl
I've been on a couple tinder dates. The thing is if you're not living full time nearby each other, he's probably going to assume you're just in it for a hook-up. If you're really interested in this guy, feel free to text him again when you're back in town, but keep your guard up if you're looking for something more than a few nights hooking up when you're in town and no contact in between. There's a chance he didn't think anything more long-term was an option, but there's also a chance he's just not interested in anything more. The guy I'm just starting to date started trying to have sex the first time we went out, but I stopped it because I want to wait till I'm married and he ended up staying for sveeral hours and asking me lots of deep questions about my beliefs, and we've gone out again since then. He might have thought he was on tinder for sex, but if he's willing to keep spending time with someone who won't give him what he wanted, he probably was open to a relationship all along. You never know what your guy might be open to until you ask. So feel free to give him another shot, but don't be all in right away, just in case. Gotta take care of yourself too. Tinder is crazy and seems like a hopeless place to start dating for real, but it's not impossible. I've met several very nice guys there.1