This guy won't leave me alone, and I'm not sure what to do about it?

The guy who took my senior pictures recently came over to drop them off. I learned that we both got hired at a new, local restaurant. We started texting a little bit, since work starts soon. A friend of mine who knows him told me he's a little creepy, 34, and has a DWI when I asked her about him. After I told him I'm 18, he said it's good to know I'm legal, asked if I'd ever do a "sexy" shoot (which I declined to), and asked if I want to hang with him some day. He asked what time I check in to work on Mondays so he could see me briefly. We talked about photography and got to talking about other things. He asked what bra and waist size I have (to use for quick draw) and so that he could order clothes and lingerie for shoots and know it'd fit me - after I said I wasn't interested in another shoot, said that he's always admired my body, and proceeded to ask for a date.

I explained that I'm extremely busy with school and didn't know if I'd be able to find time and he got REALLY irritated, said he felt stupid for asking since he hasn't asked a girl out in 3 years, but it was whatever, and would never ask again. I didn't want him to be upset so I told him if I found time I would. I told him that I like him, since he asked (as a friend), but then he said he was glad he got me to admit that I "like and want him" after months of him trying to get me to.. I didn't know what to say and was tired, so I said I was going to bed. He continued to text me and I woke up to a bunch of messages.

I don't want to hurt his feelings, and feel terrible that he got the insinuation that I want this type of relationship/interaction from him, but that doesn't take away from the fact that I'm very uncomfortable now. I'm not sure if I should confront him and risk hurting his feelings for an awkward workspace in return, or what to do. I just don't see how he expects something like he thinks is going work.


What Guys Said 1

  • Looking for a way to reject someone without hurting his feelings is like looking for El Dorado (or Sanctuary... bonus points for people who know what movie that references). It doesn't exist.

    You should tell him on no uncertain terms that you are not and never will be interested in him. You tell him that you are being clear to him because you don't want to lead him on.

    If this makes for an awkward work situation, you must understand it's on him because he brought it on by asking out someone he works with. In the meantime, you act professionally and don't allow yourself to feel awkward... or at least try not to.


What Girls Said 1

  • if he already makes u feel uncomfortable trust your gut. if he genuinely cared about you then he wouldn't get irritated with your answer. so he sounds like a potential stalker. some guys can't be told no so limit the time you spend alone with him and dont fall for any pity parties he may throw u. he is old enough to accept rejection! and think of it this way, what if he IS a stalker or somethkng worse? so u think he is caring about your feelings making you uncomfortable and questioning his motives? nice guys dont do that