My Girlfriend has Depression and has started skipping work. What should I do?

We are both in our late 20s, aka this isn't a meaningless job, this is her career. She just moved into an apt without roommates, and has now skipped 2 days of work this week because she could bring herself to get out of bed, much less to leave the apartment. I love her, but I don't know how I can help, and I can't and won't pay for her to be financially dependent on me. She's not lazy, this is very unlike her. What would you do? We've been together over a year.


Most Helpful Girl

  • If you can force her to go to work, force her in any way you want. Not only because she might get fired if she skips too many days of work but also because even though staying at home and in bed seems like a comforting thing for people who are dealing with depression, it is also exactly what will make her sink in it even deeper. The more she stays at home, the less she'd want to go out and she'll just be left alone with unhealthy thoughts I guess.
    Of course, you can tell her about the reasoning I just mentionned and tell her it's for her own good so she doesn't feel too pressured.

    You can also try to go out with her more if you can.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I've just come out of a 6 year depression. just stating that to make the point that i know what its like

    she needs therapy and you need to force her to go to work. she may very well not want to go, but getting fired will make matters MUCH worse. you are going to need to be extremely patient with her and dont push her to do anything she doesn't want (with the exception of work - because, like i said, thats too important). invest extra time in the things she does want to do. she needs to basically re-learn that doing things makes you happy, and she isn't going to do that without therapy and your patience.

    good luck, its a tough road ahead for you


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What Girls Said 3

  • I would _insist_ that she she see a psychiatrist. If she can't get out of bed, she's quite ill.

    Be aware that she might be so bad off that she just get can't get things done- making a doctor's appointment might simply be too hard for her. In that case, you'll have to take an active role in getting her help.

  • Advice her to see a psychiatrist or to go to therapy. You have to be there for her and make sure that she's able to provide for herself. Depression is a killer, I know that first hand, so that's not going to be easy but you have to make it work. Hope she gets better

  • Talk to her about it and suggest she goes to see a therapist


What Guys Said 1

  • Be assertive about her seeing a psychologist.