Should you tell a guy directly that you like him or is that too forward?

I really like this guy and well I told him I wanted to tell him something and so now he's expecting me to tell him well the thing I was gonna tell him is that I like him (straight up) or is that too forward? If it's too forward what can I say? I'm not 100% sure if he likes me back too it seems like je does but I don't know like I don't wanna ruin our friendship. I was thinking of messaging him saying "I know we're just friends but well what I wanted to tell you is that I like you and I like talking to you, it makes me happy and I just like u in general) should I say that or what should I say? And will this ruin our friendship if he doesn't feel the same way?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It depends on your freind. But don't do it through text do it in person. When your hanging out with him just tell him fairly casually.
    If you two are really good freinds then it will stand up to it. If your not true freinds then it won't
    Like I thought I was good freind with a girl but she was just using me. So when I asked her out she hated it and destroyed the "freindship"
    Another girl back in highschool said she liked me but I did not feel that way about her. She was like a sister to me so I said that I would think about how I feel about her. I took a week and said that she is like a sister to me I just don't feel that way but I do love her as my freind. We were really good freinds until we graduated and we just lost touch. That might have made us better freinds in the long run. I know that it made me realize that I loved having her as my freind. It might have worked out if I tried it but I did not. We stayed great freinds.
    Now I'm in a position where I like my freind and I let her know about it with a hand written note. When I go to talk to her about the note or ask her out I just freeze. I do flirt with her and touch her. When I can I act like a gentleman. Honestly I can't tell what she thinks about me but she is still my freind. So I don't know she might be waiting for me to make a move.

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    • 1mo

      Yeahh she might be waiting for you to mask a move that's what girls usually do lol so you should ask her out

    • 1mo

      I would except that I keep freezing when I attempt to. Interestingly enough last time I saw her after I talked with her a bit she went to another group circle but when I tried to head over there I got cold feet a few times. I have never been afraid to talk with my freind before.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I am in the same situation!!!
    I like my best friend and gonna tell how i think about him. I am gonna say like "i know you think me as a good friend but i have to tell you this i like you. This feeling is more than friendship and you don't have to like me and i really don't wanna ruin our friendship"

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    • 1mo

      That's actually a good way to say it! If you don't mind I'm gonna steal that Hahaha and I hope he likes you back too!!! Wish you all the best girl! :)

    • 1mo

      Sorry but im gonna have to disagree on that. Guys like confidence in girls too, so saying "... you don't have to like me..." sounds like she doesn't expect the guy to be into her. Just assume he's attracted to you, then your confidence will come across and make the guy go wow!

    • 1mo

      @MusicMayhem I mean if she says that then if the guy didn't feel the same way about her they would still be friends right without anhfnjng being ruined? I mean with my situation the guy did say he's physically attracted to me and that he wants to make out and stuff but he might mean that as a friend only

What Guys Said 15

  • Yes, you should go and tell him straight up, be straightforward. It's fine, guys appreciate that.

    However as you said if you are not 100% then you shouldn't tell him now. You should try to confirm this.

    What I suggest you should do is first you should try and confirm if he likes you 100% or not, once you are sure about this, then take the first step and tell him, don't wait for him to tell you first. Just be brave and take the first step otherwise you will keep wondering what it could have been.

    I don't think it will ruin your friendship, you shouldn't assume that because you never know the truth. Irrespective to whether he feels the same about you or not, he can still choose to be your friend.

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  • I think you should and at least you'll know one way or the other for your own peace of mind. As a guy, I would like it if a woman was that forward, really like it. A bit taken back maybe at first because it just doesn't happen very often but I'm all for it. I'm always saying women need to be more direct and make the first move.

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  • Only if you care what other people think. Just ignore the girls that claim it's too desperate/slutty and the guys that freak out by a women approaching him. If you get him, the others are losing out. And whilst you wait, he may be courting other girls...

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    • 1mo

      Yeah I agree it's better to just be straight forward but I'm just scared he won't feel the same way like I don't wanna embarrass myself or have our friendship ruined and him never talking to me again

    • 1mo

      Well you can't truly know how he feels about you, that's out of your control. What is within your control is telling him you like him. Guys hardly get approached so even if he doesn't like you that way, he'll probably be flattered that you told him how you feel.

  • Think about this logically: if he likes he will be thrilled when you tell him you like him, if he doesn't like you he won't be thrilled but there also wouldn't be any other way you could change his mind. Whether he likes has already been decided, now you just need to find out.

    Don't worry about "the friendship" because there hasn't been a true friendship since one of you started liking the other: there is no friendship to lose.

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    • 1mo

      He said he's attracted to me physically and he would wanna kiss and stuff and we talk everyday all day and he always messages me first that's why I think he likes me but at the same time it could be he likes me as a friends with benefits or something

    • 1mo

      Yes, that's possible, but you have to take risks to get the things you want: like I said, whether he likes you has already been decided, you just need to get an answer.

  • Most guys don't like mind games so I would suggest to be a straightforward and find it out in exact the same moment you asked him the question. Body language and his voice will definitely tell you if he wants to be more than just friends with you.

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  • Is he shy? Yes. Is he some hot guy? I don't fucking know. Apparently hot guys will freak out and run away if women are direct.

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  • That is always a tough choice. I've had girls interested in me that I saw as only friends; fortunately they never came out and made me say that. On the other hand, I've known girls I really liked and waited in vain for a sign that they were interested...

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  • I think you should tell him.

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  • Just tell him, or ask him out if that's easier for you. People like to be told straight up because it makes it so much easier to make a decision. The worst he can say is that he doesn't like you. In which case, you move on.

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    • 1mo

      This! You both don't waste your precious time by playing stupid games. If he doesn't like you you save your time and won't feel as bad as if he tells you after some time, otherwise you both know that like each other and have fun :)

  • There is no hard-and-fast rule. I know people who have met, bedded and married in very quick succession. Before they were both very... popular!. I also know of people who just take advantage of other people (men and women) who want them more than they do. In this game you are going to get hurt, but if you hold back you may spend your life regretting it. If you can stand getting hurt, then tell him what you feel. You never know, he may feel the same. Nobody wants to be humiliated by rejection.

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    • 1mo

      I just don't wanna ruin our friendship

  • better to know that he likes u or not... does he has any girlfriend or not? know this things than decide to tell him him or not

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  • whichever way you tell him, you stand a chance of ruining the friendship. so just tell him straight that you like him and like spending time with him etc. it is a 50/50

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  • Go for it

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  • It may make things awkward if he doesn't feel the same, but I say go for it.

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  • Being too forward is the best thing coming out of a girl to me.

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What Girls Said 9

  • I don't think it's too forward. If you like someone, you should tell them. Being direct always seems to be the best way to go. It minimizes confusion and misunderstandings.

    As for whether or not it will ruin your relationship, I don't think that's something we can speculate about. It just depends on how he reacts to it. Things may get awkward but both of you should know where you stand. Then you can decide if you want to take things further or just remain friends.

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  • Silence is Golden.
    Keep it Light and Sweet for now and Nurse and Nurture a Nice "Friendship" that if you Open up he may Grow Cold Duck feet.
    Tell him This: "I cherish our friendship and I just wanted you to know it." I f
    If he is Smart, he will Take the Helpful Hint And... Hint Back.
    Good luck. xx

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  • "LIKE" can be used ANYTIME
    and not considered forward to anyone, save the ultra gun shy

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  • I think many guys would prefer your honesty.

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  • If would say it directly if I've known him for a long enough time to feel completely at ease with him

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  • Just be honest. If it doesn't work out then whatever. At least u tried

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  • I'm too shy honestly, and if he ever asked me if I did, I'd even lie and say no. Sigh.

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    • 1mo

      Aw but who knows he might like you back too I think if he asks you, you should definitely say yes if you think he feels the same way too haha

    • 1mo

      After today, it seems like he might. I really like him, so maybe :)

  • No no your friendship should not ruin, u say him u like him

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  • Are you guys close?

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    • 1mo

      Yeah we kinda are

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